Mick Jagger spotted at The Oval as England find satisfaction elusive on day two of must-win Fifth Ashes Test
MICK JAGGER was here at The Oval, celebrating this week’s 80th birthday — and he wasn’t the only Englishman finding satisfaction to be elusive.
After a day of attrition, then jubilation, then intense frustration, England were left rueing their misfortune for the second time in a week.
Do not tell Ben Stokes that old chestnut about fortune favouring the brave.
Because England have played all of the daring cricket during this Ashes series, yet they have been repeatedly kicked in the wotsits by Lady Luck.
Had Steve Smith been run out on 43, after some magnificent work from sub fielder George Ealham, Australia would have been 194-8 and facing a serious first-innings deficit.
Yet Jonny Bairstow, and somehow it’s usually poor old Jonny, was judged to have disturbed the stumps before the ball was in his gloves, with Smith just short of his ground — and Australia’s escapologists carved out a slim lead.
Having been the victim of that controversial ‘stumping’ at Lord’s and been stranded on 99 not out before the Mancunian monsoon swept in at Old Trafford last weekend, Bairstow was deeply unfortunate again here.
Still, we are set up for a fourth gripping finish of a compelling series, as England aim to level these Ashes and the Aussies attempt to wrap up a first triumph on these shores since 2001.
The sliding-doors moment of day two of the Fifth Test arrived when Smith darted back for a quick second run but was foxed by the greyhound-like ball retrieval of sub fielder Ealham.
Haring in from deep midwicket, Ealham — son of former England all-rounder Mark and grandson of Alan, a famously outstanding fielder of the 1970s — made an outrageous pick-up and throw.
England thought they had another Gary Pratt moment, when that demon sub fielder ran out Ricky Ponting at Trent Bridge during the classic 2005 series.
Smith dived but started to walk when the big-screen replay showed him an inch short of his ground, only to be reprieved when third umpire Niton Menon decided Bairstow had gone too early.
After a forensic TV investigation into the positioning of the bails, nobody could decide whether Smith should have been in or out.
But the Aussies made much of their reprieve, Smith adding 29 more runs in a half-century partnership with skipper Pat Cummins which brought the tourists back from the brink.
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After Bairstow finally pouched Smith, scurrying back to take a fine catch, No 10 batsman Todd Murphy started hooking speed merchant Mark Wood for sixes as the Aussies carved out a 12-run lead.
For the fourth time in five Tests, England squandered a position of significant strength — and for the second time in less than a week they were left feeling hard done-by.
They had the Aussies eight down with 55 to win at Edgbaston, only for Stokes to drop rival skipper Cummins, who led his side to victory.
At Lord’s, England collapsed from 188-1, before the great Bairstow controversy, and then in Manchester the heavens rained on their parade after three days of dominance.
Here, the drama of the afternoon contrasted sharply with the torpor of the morning as the Aussie duo of Marnus Labuschagne and Usman Khawaja played Mogadon cricket — Ozzzzzzzzzball up against Bazball.
Labuschagne scored nine from 82 balls — the slowest Australian innings on English soil since before the First World War. And the poets in those trenches could have written some wonderfully bleak lines about it.
Labuschagne carried his bat as a policeman carries a taser. As a deterrent, to be used only in the last resort.
In the first hour and 45 minutes of the day, Australia scored just 35 runs.
They lost only Labuschagne. The rest of us, the will to live.
His deathly vigil was finally ended by a stunning grab from Joe Root, diving to his left at first slip off Wood.
Just before that moment, dark clouds were hovering and it felt like an instance of ‘bad play stops light’.
England bowled extremely well but the Aussies seemed to be playing for a draw, despite having bundled their opponents out for 283 shortly after tea on day one.
At one point there had been 16 maidens in 23 overs.
Still, straight after lunch, the match was ignited by that great Ashes arsonist Stuart Broad.
First, he trapped Khawaja for a 157-ball 47. In his next over, a Broad beauty had Travis Head caught behind.
Mitchell Marsh had just survived a decent leg-before shout when he launched Broad over his head for six.
But then Jimmy Anderson joined the party, forcing Marsh to chop on — England’s royal and ancient bowling duo giving their team the advantage.
Alex Carey also went ‘six and out’, following a maximum with a horrible heave to cover off Root.
Mitchell Starc perished trying to hook Wood and the Aussies had managed just 71-5 in the afternoon session.
Then came Smith’s reprieve and some feisty batting from Cummins and Murphy.
Finally, Murphy was leg-before to Woakes and, as Cummins attempted to hit Root over his head for six, he was caught on the boundary by an athletic Stokes, showing moves like Jagger himself.