I'm a paypig who spent $1,800 of my student loan on my 'findom' fetish, but I don't regret it

• A college student spent about $1,800 from his student loan to fund his "paypig" fetish.
• He enjoys "doms" he finds on Twitter financially dominating him and pays them to humiliate him.
• The business student pays for Skype sessions with some doms and met one in real life to pay them.

This as-told-to article is based on a conversation with a 23-year-old college student in the UK who used money from his student loan to fund his financial-domination fetish. He spoke on the condition of anonymity to protect his privacy. Insider has verified that he spent a portion of his loan on "findom" with documentation. The following has been edited for length and clarity. 

I'm a 23-year-old college student in the UK who's also a "paypig" — someone who enjoys being financially dominated and sending people money for the sheer sake of being humiliated.

I got into "findom," or financial domination, about two years ago during the pandemic. I discovered it through Twitter after I saw some models post their wish lists on the platform. That was my first step into the world of findom. I had just received my student-maintenance loan — a loan to help with my living expenses — and that gave me a bit of spare cash. 

At first it involved just chatting to "doms," or dominant people, via Twitter direct messages and sending them money using Cash App. After a few weeks, I booked a Skype session with a dom who asked me how much I had, and that's how I got into spending my student loan.

She was a self-described feminist dom who I thought was attractive. The power exchange appealed to me. We exchanged messages on Twitter after I sent her money through Cash App.

A few days later we set up a Skype session

During the session, she called me demeaning and humiliating names, including "pathetic loser," and did a "wallet drain," which is when a dom empties your bank account.

I spent about £800, or almost $1,000, in that 30-minute session, and she called me a "good boy" after I sent her money. The next day, she sent me a video of her counting the cash I'd sent.

I felt a bit down after she drained my account, but at the same time, I enjoyed it because it excited and aroused me. I took a break from it after that because of how much I spent, but I ended up getting back into it — like a lot of paypigs seem to do.

I find doms, or "goddesses" as some like to call themselves, via Twitter hashtags including "#findom" and "#paypig." Along with the hashtags, they post pictures of themselves with captions detailing how they enjoy using men.

Most of them have their Cash App usernames in their Twitter profiles so that a paypig can send them a "tribute fee" before they answer any direct messages. What appeals to me most is when a dom posts something that plays into that power dynamic, such as how they get men to send them money.

Another aspect of findom I've tried out is 'cash meets'

"Cash meets" are when subs meet up with doms in real life to withdraw money from an ATM and give it to them. Doms will post on Twitter when they're available for cash meets in certain areas and subs can message them to arrange a time. 

I had a cash meet with the dom I had a Skype session with, and met her in a busy area where I live. I let her take my bank card and gave her the PIN so she could withdraw the cash. Initially we agreed she could take £200, but she told me she was taking £350, and I let her.

I have kissed their boots

She punched in the digits, took the money from my account, and made me count it before she patted me on my head in a degrading way and walked off. I enjoyed it, and did another cash meet in a less-public place where I bowed down and kissed her knee-high boots.

I participate in findom every few months. The last Skype session I had with a dom was about a week ago, and over the past few months, I've sent money to different doms. It's quite addictive, and I've definitely spent money when I shouldn't have. I've deleted Twitter a few times, but I've kept going back because of the thrill of it. 

I've kept it a secret from friends and family because it's not something I want them to know about. I'm a little worried about getting into debt, but when you're in the moment, sending them money, especially on a Skype session, you're under a dom's spell.

I've stopped doing Skype sessions for the time being so I can spend money on other things, but I struggle to see myself getting completely out of it. In total I've spent almost £1,500, or about $1,800, from student loan to fund my fetish, and I don't regret it.