‘Grey’s Anatomy’ star Sarah Drew met husband leading worship at Christian youth camp
"Grey's Anatomy" star Sarah Drew found lasting love long before she found Hollywood fame.
Drew opened up about meeting her husband while leading worship at a Christian youth camp nearly three decades ago. The actress, who has been married to Peter Lanfer for 24 years, credited their shared faith and strong partnership with helping her navigate the highs and lows of Hollywood. Drew and Lanfer married in 2002 and have two children.
"He's been my steady rock really and safe haven – since way before I had any success in this industry," Drew told Fox News Digital while promoting her upcoming movie, "Jimmy."
"And we have been real partners in parenting and in being humans in this world together," she added. "And I think anytime one of us is feeling shaky, the other one is always able to provide a safe harbor and some real like rock-solid strength for the other. So, I do think probably he's my greatest grounding force."
Drew described the entertainment industry as an unpredictable business that can celebrate an actor one moment and discard that person the next, explaining why she refuses to let Hollywood determine her self-worth.
"I think that it's very easy for Hollywood to tell you who you are. And what I mean by that is, they love you one second, they've forgotten you the next. You're gorgeous one second. They're tearing you to pieces the next. You're working all the time one second, all of a sudden, you're not working anymore, and you don't know what's going on. You never know when you're gonna work again. There is no stability anywhere."
Drew said the industry's constant uncertainty makes it difficult for actors to find a sense of stability in their careers.
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"There is no place to be grounded in Hollywood. It just doesn't exist," she explained. "We are players to the whims of whoever is making the thing at the certain time and whoever's decided who's interesting or not, and I can't do anything about that."
"If I were not sure that my identity was firmly rooted first as a child of God, whose total identity is so much bigger than just who I am as an actress, if I wasn't rooted in that truth — and I know that truth to my cellular level and in my bones — I could so easily get caught up in the highs and think I'm God's gift to the Earth and then fall so miserably into I am absolutely worthless based on how Hollywood has decided to value me at any given time," she added.
Drew said her faith has helped her maintain a strong sense of identity beyond her career, reminding her that being a child of God, a wife, a mother and a friend matters more than her success as an actress.
Drew stars in "Jimmy," a biographical drama scheduled for nationwide theatrical release Nov. 6. The film follows actor James Stewart's military service, his struggles upon returning to Hollywood and his eventual comeback in the 1946 Christmas classic "It's a Wonderful Life," directed by Frank Capra.
Drew stars as Hedda Hopper, one of Hollywood's most influential and feared gossip columnists.
"18 months before we started shooting, Aaron Burns …reached out to me and told me that he'd gotten the rights and had a script for this movie, ‘Jimmy,’ that he was gonna make about this incredibly important time in Jimmy's life. And I've always been a huge fan of Jimmy Stewart," she said.
Drew said Burns told her he wanted her to play Hedda Hopper, but she didn't know much about the gossip columnist. Burns told her about "this formidable and complicated person." Drew said she doesn't "generally get the opportunity to play roles like this, so I said yes before I got off the phone, before I read the script."
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The "Supernatural" star's Christian faith has also influenced her decision to turn down acting opportunities. While Drew isn't opposed to exploring difficult subjects onscreen, she said she has rejected projects that she believed lacked a meaningful message.
"I have turned down jobs because I'm like, I don't know what we're supposed to walk away from this feeling," Drew explained. "I don't see any hope. I only see cynicism. Then I'm not interested."
Drew said she has always been drawn to stories that offer something meaningful rather than leaving audiences feeling hopeless.
"I just don't understand choosing something that is only going to make people feel darker or more devastated or more hopeless, like those kinds of things," she said. "And I think that that does very much stem from my faith and from my sense of the story that sort of bubbles through my life and has all through my upbringing. And through my adult life and as a parent and as a friend and all of these things, is that I want there to be hope associated with everything that I touch or am a part of – something that you can really like look toward as a beacon of goodness in some ways."
That philosophy also plays a central role in how Drew evaluates potential projects, a process she said often involves conversations with her husband. Rather than focusing on the prestige or financial rewards of a project, Drew said the couple first considers whether the story is one she wants to tell.
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"It almost never is about what I might get paid, how fancy the project is, what network it's going to be on," she explained. "Those things are absolutely secondary to the first question, which is, 'Do you want to tell the story? Is this story that you think is going to resonate with people?'"
"I find that the stories that I'm drawn to are the ones that help people feel less alone and where someone can see themselves in a story," Drew said. "They can pick a redemption arc or a restoration arc and feel a little less alone. And they might laugh and cry and think on their way through the story of it, but at the end of it, they're like, 'Me too. I've also been through something like that. I know what that feeling is, and I feel a little less burdened and a little less alone because I have this opportunity to have this cathartic experience in a way that made me feel seen.'"