Kristi Noem takes heat after bagging a massive elk & Keely Hodgkinson's sexy new speedsuit is a talker
'Nightcaps' is a daily column that catches you up on the biggest sports, news and culture stories you may have missed while pretending to do work at your desk. It runs Monday-Friday on OutKick.com.
We did it, friends. We made it to fall.
Now, I know Joe Kinsey tried to convince you in this morning's Screencaps that preferring autumn to summer is some sort of psy-op. That pumpkin spice is the devil's cocaine.
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But, respectfully, that just sounds like the opinion of someone who lives in northern Ohio. For those of us suffering in the ungodly heat and 400% humidity of the American South, sweater weather can't come soon enough.
In fact, today is the first time in nearly a month (26 days) that the temperature hasn't surpassed 90 degrees.
I mean, it's still 85. But baby steps.
Fun fact: just last week, the largest heat dome on planet Earth was centered right over my home state of Tennessee. I'll let this guy tell you all about it:
In other words, it's been miserable.
Man, I'm doing so much whining you'd think I was Caleb Williams pulling a hamstring.
Point is, I am positively giddy about dropping temperatures, changing leaves, fall hiking and not drowning in a vat of my own sweat. Hell, I might even burn a pumpkin candle — just to get all the haters riled up.
Speaking of haters, welcome to Tuesday Nightcaps, where Kristi Noem is taking some online heat for killing an animal. (Not her dog this time, thank God.)
But first, we're talking running fashion.
Buckle in, kids, and let's do this thing.
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Keely Hodgkinson — an Olympic middle distance runner for Team Great Britain, in case you didn't know — turned some heads at the season-ending Athlos meet in North London on Friday. That's because, while all the other runners were decked out in their standard tiny bottoms and tanks, Keely rolled up in an all black, full-body catsuit.
Excuse me, it's a "zero-distraction speed suit," according to Nike.
But, respectfully, it was a little distracting. Just check out the aerodynamics on that thing!
I personally feel a little vindicated by Keely's look. In the handful of distance races I've done, the "serious" runners always say to me, "How do you run in leggings?!" As if I might as well tape concrete blocks to my feet while I'm at it.
And my answer is always the same: how do you NOT run in leggings?
See, the way my thighs are set up, running long distance in a pair of shorty shorts would just mean punching a one-way ticket to Chafe-town.
Granted, I'm just a casual neighborhood runner — not an Olympic sprinter. So what do I know?
This reminds me of that time a couple of years ago when Nike debuted its Team USA track and field kits for the Paris Olympics. The internet freaked out over the "sexist" designs meant to sexualize female track and field athletes instead of equipping them with comfortable and appropriate attire to compete.
Turns out, though, what actually happened is that Nike offered the women about 20 different combinations of a uniform — with tops and bottoms of various lengths. The ladies even had the option of wearing the men's kit if it would make them more comfortable.
It just so happens, though, that nearly all the female athletes chose to wear the tiny bikini and sports bra combo. So the outrage was entirely overblown. As social media outrage tends to be.
I digress.
Keely is having none of those front-wedgie-inducing underwears. And I don't blame her one bit.
She won the women's 800-meter event wearing that catsuit, by the way. So she might be onto something.
It's been a rough year for ol' Kristi Noem. First, she was ousted from her role as DHS Secretary. And then came those um... unflattering photos of her husband.
Kristi got knocked down. But in the spirit of Chumbawamba, she got up again.
And now, she's bagged a massive elk on an archery hunting trip in Wyoming.
I can't show you the picture of her and the actual elk because Instagram has deemed it too graphic for embeds. But you can see the gigantic animal she harvested here if you're interested.
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You really have to toe the line with hunting content on Instagram. You can post all the dead fish photos you want, but as soon as you show a mammal down, it becomes a whole thing.
Last week, I posted a cute little video of NASCAR driver Chase Briscoe talking about his 4-year-old son's love of hunting on OutKick OutDoors. Instagram finally allowed it, but it got shadow banned on YouTube and removed from TikTok for "violating community guidelines."
Annoying.
Predictably, Kristi has gotten plenty of hate in the comments for harvesting this big, beautiful bull elk. And yes, probably from the same people who have no problem grabbing a Big Mac from the McDonald's drive-thru. Because as long as you don't have to actually see the dead animal you're eating, you can delude yourself into believing you have the moral high ground.
Kristi put the critics in their place, calling them "ignorant and uninformed."
"Of course this beautiful animal will nourish our family and many others we will share with," she wrote.
"These majestic animals are incredible and I’ve so loved learning their ways from my father, sharing memories in the mountains with him and my brothers and now my friends."
Kristi concluded: "Shame on you who desecrate and don’t understand the stewardship responsibilities God has given us. Go to a store and shop for anything that hasn’t been harvested and you will find bare shelves and your family will starve."
Anyway, who wants elk burgers?
Let's open the mailbag.
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Last week, we talked about how some losers (unsuccessfully) tried to cancel Ella Langley after some old photos resurfaced of her deer hunting in Alabama.
Gary B. writes: The state of NJ has such an over population of deer that the hunting season has been extended. They are destroying the ecosystem. The season starts October 3rd and me and my brother are tracking a massive buck on his property in the southern Pine Barrens. His son got a large buck last year and hopefully that trend will continue.
As far as the WNBA, basketball in general sucks. The game went south when they added the 3 point line. Basketball used to almost be as physical as football or hockey. You had to control the paint it was an inside game of strength. Now they shoot soon as they cross the half court line. The only basketball I watch is college hoops in the month of March. That's awesome but then again college sports are in my opinion better then the professional level mainly because of the intensity of the crowd . Texas and Ohio State proves my point.
Nikki S. writes: Love Ella and all the hate only shows she’s "made it." Unfortunately that’s the world we live in today. And btw pretty sure the majority of Ella’s fan base was raised where hunting and fishing were both recreation and a source of food.
Steve B. writes: The idiot who thinks hunting is a moral problem, has never gone to a slaughterhouse or feedlot to see how his porterhouse steak is actually created.
John G. writes: I have the pain and joy of watching this teams since founding when Wilson was the coach and his son was the QB. Been thru the the perfect season. Also attended their first game in now named Hard Rock stadium when the team was owned by the "Garbage Man".
So I have seen the highlights and low lights.
They will be back maybe not this year but eventually. I just hope they don't capture Detroit's record.
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Amber:
Listen, if you're gonna tank, TANK.
None of this 6-11, 5-12 crap. I'm expecting a full buy-in from team personnel: No. 1 draft pick or bust, baby.
If you've never seen a massive silverback gorilla have a medical checkup, now you have.
They are putting a whole lot of faith in that anesthesia.