Dear Abby: In-laws make themselves at home long before dinner
DEAR ABBY: How should I handle in-laws who show up three or more hours early for dinner and just sit at the kitchen counter? I have things to do; I don't have time to entertain them, and I can't persuade them to leave the kitchen. It really puts a damper on my final prep and last-minute cleaning. I don't want to be rude. They are nice people, but I can't handle this anymore. — ON DISPLAY IN ILLINOIS
DEAR ON DISPLAY: Not everyone likes to have company in their kitchen while they are getting ready to entertain. Does your husband know you feel so strongly about this? If he doesn't, let him know, because you may need his help to get the message across to his folks and siblings that you (BOTH) prefer they don't show up early. Of course, the alternative would be for him to entertain them while you prep.
There is a poem on this subject in my "Keepers" booklet. It was written years ago by a woman named Susan Sawyer and has appeared in my column. It is aptly titled "Stay Out of My Kitchen."
Please stay away from my kitchen
From my dishwashing, cooking and such;
You were kind to have offered to pitch in
But thanks, no, thank you so much!
Please don't think me ungracious
When I ask that you leave me alone;
For my kitchen's not any too spacious
And my routine is strictly my own.
Tell you what: You stay out of my kitchen
With its sodden, hot, lackluster lures —
When you're here, stay out of my kitchen
And I promise to stay out of yours!
DEAR ABBY: I am a sales associate at a business that sells sewing machines, vacuums and quilting fabric. I was hired to sell machines. Another employee, "Natasha," was hired to manage the fabric department. In crunch times, our duties overlap. We are paid hourly as well as a commission on the sewing machines.
Yesterday, I had an outstanding sales day. The store was packed with customers, and Natasha spent the entire day in the fabric department. This allowed me to focus on the sales floor. At the end of the day, we were both exhausted, and I remarked that I'd had a great sales day, briefly listing the items that I sold.
Today, the boss mentioned that I should not have bragged about my sales because Natasha was upset that she was stuck in the fabric department and unable to sell or demo any machines. It caught me by surprise. Did I do something wrong? — SALESPERSON IN TEXAS
DEAR SALESPERSON: Yes, you did. Your boss told you so. It's no wonder hearing you crow about your good fortune upset Natasha after a long, hard day. In the future, keep your lip zipped (or someone may sew it shut for you).
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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