Emme Grede was criticized for saying she's a "max three-hour mum" on the weekends in a recent profile.
Craig Barritt/Getty Images for Emma Grede
Emma Grede's comment on being a "max three-hour mum" on weekends sparked a heated parenting debate.
Grede's remarks highlight the challenges faced by ambitious working moms.
Business Insider spoke to four high-achieving moms. Some agreed with Grede, and one pushed back on her style.
Three hours was all it took to ignite the latest parenting debate.
When Skims cofounder Emma Grede, a mother of four, described herself as a "max three-hour mum" on weekends in a recent Wall Street Journal interview, saying that instead she focuses on creating "high-impact, core memories" with her children, reactions ranged from validation to outrage.
Grede responded, saying during an April 14 appearance on "Today with Jenna and Sheinelle" that she was "caught off guard" by the intensity of the viral response and that women entrepreneurs are "held to such an impossible standard both as parents, but also as businesswomen."
The author not only sparked a broader conversation about parenting styles but also highlighted the pressures working mothers face to be present at home while remaining ambitious at work — a balance that often feels impossible to get right.
The reality is that there is no universal formula for how much time you need to spend parenting your children. And yet, the expectation that mothers should somehow get it exactly right persists.
When Grede put a number on her own experience, it didn't just spark discussion; it forced a conversation many women are having privately. About trade-offs. About ambition. About the quiet recalculations of work-life balance happening every single day.
So Business Insider asked four working mothers to share how they think about time, presence, and managing competing demands of work and family.
Alex Otto, a marketing consultant and mother of 3, says she was raised much like Grede is raising her children.Alex Otto is a marketing consultant and mother of three.
Alex Otto
When you heard Emma Grede say she spends about three hours a day with her children on the weekends, what was your reaction?
I've actually lived that experience, but from the child's perspective. My mom was a corporate banker in the 90s, and she was probably away from home just as much.
What I remember is that most of our time together happened in the mornings and evenings, which are the busiest parts of the day. You're getting ready for school, winding down, doing dinner, and baths. So it made me think about whether those are actually quality hours.
I also immediately thought about the level of support she must have. To maintain a career like that, there has to be a very strong support system in place.
How do you personally define enough time with your children?
I honestly don't know how to define it, and I think I'm still figuring that out. I have three kids, and even though I'm with them a lot, I don't always feel like I'm giving each of them the undivided attention they deserve.
I think balance shifts depending on the season you're in. Right now, my kids are young and need a lot, so it feels like a constant juggle. I want a balanced life, and I don't think doing only career or only family is the answer, but I also don't know exactly where that line is yet.
How do guilt, fulfillment, and ambition factor into that balance?
My kids are incredibly fulfilling, but so is my work. I've gone back to school for my MBA, and that takes me away a couple of days a month, but it's also something that challenges me and fulfills me in a different way.
I think sometimes we don't talk enough about how important it is for moms to have things that stimulate them outside their children. Not just self-care, but real intellectual or professional fulfillment.
Do you think conversations like this help or harm working mothers?
They're incredibly important. This isn't just a "mom problem," it's something the entire family should be thinking about, including partners and workplaces.
The more we talk about how hard it is to balance raising kids, running a household, and building a career, the better. It also helps remind bosses and leaders, especially those who may be past this stage, how challenging it really is.
Crystal Foote, an entrepreneur of an ad tech company and mother of 2, sees herself in Grede.Crystal Foote is the cofounder of Digital Culture Group, an ad tech company, and is also a mother of two.
Crystal Foote
When you heard Emma Grede say she spends about three hours a day with her children on the weekends, what was your reaction?
I agreed with her. Schedules change day to day, and it's hard to balance everything when you're building something at that level. Who are we to shame a mother for building billion-dollar brands while raising multiple children? She's trying to do it all, and that's not easy.
How do you personally define enough time with your children?
I can't quantify it. Every week is different. I co-mingle my time… It's about making it work in real time.
How do guilt, fulfillment, and ambition factor into that balance?
I've had to make real sacrifices. I had a conference in New York the same week as my kids' spring break trip to the Bahamas. I couldn't cancel it. I had a panel, a sponsorship, and meetings with major brands. So I flew to the Bahamas for a few days, then back to New York, then back again. Did I spend every possible hour with my kids that week? No. But I'm also building something to provide for them long term.
Do you think conversations like this help or harm working mothers?
I think they help. These kinds of honest conversations don't usually happen. When women in leadership, like a CMO or a founder, speak openly about the reality, even if there's backlash, it helps normalize it. It stops everything from being framed through outdated gender roles and allows women to define success on their own terms.
Mandy Castillo, owner of a family-owned ice cream and dairy farm and mother of 2, rejects Grede's parenting style.Mandy Castillo, owner of Prigel Family Creamery, said she disagrees with Emma Grede's 3-hour weekend parenting style.
Mandy Castillo
When you heard Emma Grede say she spends about three hours a day with her children on the weekends, what was your reaction?
I couldn't feel more opposite from that. My kids are my favorite people, and I want to spend as much time with them as possible. Everything I do is either building something for them or figuring out how to bring them into what I'm doing so we can be together.
How do you personally define enough time with your children?
I don't think there is 'enough.' When you really think about how little time you have before they grow up and [then they] don't need you in the same way, it changes everything.
My oldest is about to turn 14, and I can already see how fast it's going. Every second I have with them is one less second I get. So for me, I'll take any opportunity I can to be with them.
How do guilt, fulfillment, and ambition factor into that balance?
It depends on the support you have at home. It matters. My dad was at everything growing up, and that's the standard I want for my kids.
At the same time, I think moms still carry a different kind of mental load. Even when both parents are working, there are things like day-to-day details and the "magic" of the home that moms tend to take on more.
I was building a business while raising babies at the same time. There were definitely moments where I felt like I was failing on both ends. I would take my kids everywhere with me, to work, to jobs, to everything, because I didn't have another option.
It's not that you don't want to be with your kids. It's that doing both at the same time is really hard.
Do you think conversations like this help or harm working mothers?
They help because there's no one right way to do this. Everyone's situation is different, from finances to childcare to where you live.
Talking to other moms who are figuring it out is encouraging. You won't get it perfectly right. You'll try, adjust, and keep going. What matters is building that relationship with your kids.
Ashleigh Coaxum, the owner of a stationery store and mother of 2, was impressed that Grede put a number on it.Ashleigh Coaxum is the owner of Paper Herald, a stationery store in Baltimore. She's also a mother of 2.
Ashleigh Coaxum
When you heard Emma Grede say she spends about three hours a day with her children on the weekends, what was your reaction?
I thought she was being realistic. It's hard to juggle being the CEO of your house and the CEO of your business. The fact that she can even quantify her time tells me she's intentional about it. There's time for play, and there's time for work.
How do you personally define enough time with your children?
I don't think there is "enough" time. I try to be mindful of the season we're in as a family. If my kids need more from me emotionally or socially, I adjust my schedule. I'm more fluid.
At the end of the day, your children are with you for life, so you don't want to shortchange them in the short term and have it impact them long term.
How do guilt, fulfillment, and ambition factor into that balance?
Ambition comes with a lot of sacrifice, and balancing it isn't easy. A village and a supportive spouse are so important to make it all work. And it also really depends on the season you're in with your children; all of those factors matter when it comes to balance.
Do you think conversations like this help or harm working mothers?
The conversation is a bit misplaced. People are doing the best they can. These kinds of takes might make for good sound bites, but they don't actually help parents figure out how to balance raising kids while also providing a stable life.