I tried 6 pairs of fake-bum pants on my rubbish, flat behind – I’d considered implants but £12.99 buy did trick instead
FROM the Kardashians to gym-obsessed Instagram influencers, there seems to be a big butt wiggling at you wherever you turn.
And for those of us who are not blessed in the backside — and can’t be bothered spending hours doing squats — it can be very demoralising.
Aged 44, and a busy mum to Ruby, 16, and Mabel, eight, I don’t spend hours agonising over my lack- lustre behind, but whenever I do catch a glimpse of it in the mirror, I wish it was more shapely.
Thankfully though, there is help out there in the form of padded pants, which give the illusion of a curvaceous bottom.
Online sellers including Amazon and Temu are awash with these stuffed knickers, some for less than £10.
Next week, underwear champion Marks & Spencer is releasing its own £15 butt-boosting briefs.
I decided to check some out to see whether they are worth investing in.
I’d never really realised I had a flat bum until my mid thirties when my mum made a joke about us having matching flat bums.
She’s passed now but I still think about what she said.
From that day on, I’ve been really self-conscious about my bottom. If anyone pays me a compliment on my appearance, I say, “Thanks, but I’ve got a really rubbish flat bum”.
I’ve always thought of it as the worst part of my body.
Around two years ago, I lost a lot of weight, around 11 stone. I’m a size 10 now and I can wear whatever clothes I want. I’ve got a great figure and nice boobs, but then there is my bum. It lets me down and I’m bitter about it.
I dislike my bottom so much I’ve genuinely considered implants.
I’ve had breast implants so I’m not afraid of having surgery if it makes me look better. I definitely wouldn’t rule it out.
The only reason I haven’t done it yet is because it is so expensive. But if these pants don’t work, I’ll have to start saving.
I’ve tried everything else. Bum-shaping leggings just don’t work on a bottom like mine.
They simply seem to squish it flatter rather than push it up to make it look peachy.
I know I’m not alone. There are those of us for whom a flat bottom is in the genes. My daughter Ruby often comments about hers.
But then I also have lots of friends who talk about “the mum bum” — it’s never the same again after pregnancy.
Or those whose weight has fluctuated and their bottom has paid the price.
For the sake of all women with unremarkable backsides, I’m willing to get mine out and put these padded pants to the test, here.
Hopefully, it will save me a fortune on implants.
BOTTOM LINE ON PADDED PANTS
Joyshaper, £19.99: 5/5
WOW! I actually have a bum.
Usually a dress like this would hang off me but it fits so much better and I feel far more confident in it.
The pants are lightweight and the extra boost is just the right amount.
If anything, they are more comfy than big knickers when you are sitting down, due to the extra cushioning.
The only downside is you can slightly see the outline of the pads through the dress.
Dersitty, £12.99: 1/5
I AM not sold on this pair. They feel a lot more restrictive but I think that’s more the material they are made from – polyester and elastane.
The pads aren’t as full and the undies aren’t that soft.
I feel quite conscious that the pads are there and I wouldn’t feel confident if I walked into a bar wearing these pants under this dress.
I want to turn heads but not for the wrong reasons.
MNSFA, £9.83: 2/5
THESE look so weird – as if I’m wearing some sort of apparatus.
There’s one long pad across both bum cheeks, rather than one oval pad per cheek. So there is a big gap between my skin and the padding in places.
The pants are low-rise whereas I like mine at my waist.
With the dress on, you can hardly see the padding, but if I went on a date and were to come home and get my kit off . . . well I wouldn’t. I’d feel too ridiculous.
RosinKing, £16.99: 3/5
OH NO! These look like hospital pants.
The knickers have no give, they’re so uncomfortable.
You would not be able to eat or drink anything in them.
However, no pain no gain, right? I have to admit, my bum does look better.
The knickers only have one pad rather than two separate ones, and the overall appearance of my bottom looks natural and fuller.
OK, I’m not Kim Kardashian – but this is as close as I’m ever getting.
Anghomi, £12.99: 4/5
I REALLY like these, they feel so comfortable and compact.
The pads sit in the right place. With them on, if I give my tush a squeeze, it feels almost like a real bottom – there is natural firmness to the padding.
You can see the padding through the dress but only just.
The padding gives a natural curve to the bottom, unlike some of the others.
My second favourite after the Joyshapers.