Jeremy Clarkson breaks silence on deaths of beloved animals at Diddly Squat Farm where he saw partner cry for 1st time
HIS crazy stunts on Top Gear and The Grand Tour were often world firsts, and in the upcoming series of Clarkson’s Farm we’ll see another one – Jeremy crying actual tears.
The petrolhead-turned-agriculturalist and his girlfriend Lisa Hogan focus their efforts on rearing pigs, only to watch the tragedy of them perishing in large numbers.
Though he’s fearlessly navigated some tricky situations in his broadcasting career, the new series shows Jeremy looking utterly and bereft.
He said: “It was just a heartbreaking time.
“I’ve never, ever seen Lisa cry — not once, ever since that all started and was unfolding. It was terrible.
“It is weird, because you love them and you help birth them and you feed and nurture and care for them. I mean, you don’t say, ‘Let’s buy some pigs and hope they die.’
“I’ve always liked pigs. My mother always used to buy me toy pigs every Christmas and birthday into my twenties, and I thought it would be fun to have them — then they all just died in alarming numbers.
“It was absolutely horrific at the time, and we had another calamity with them just the other day, but by and large they’re now going OK.
“We’re getting more robust now, though — we’re a bit stronger at dealing with it.”
The new, eight-part series of Clarkson’s Farm arrives on Prime Video next week — and the first two outings were huge hits for the streamer.
Jeremy’s fellow farm helpers — including trusty sidekick Kaleb Cooper — are all back, along with Lisa running the farm shop.
‘Get Henry hoover on your blackberry hedges’
But there’s a big change this time because, after the council forced him to shut down the on-site cafe and restaurant where he planned to sell the beef produced on the farm, Jeremy decided to reduce the number of cows he had and instead buy some pigs for breeding.
As with so many of his attempts at farming, he isn’t entirely successful, but even his constant critic, Kaleb, admits he does a pretty good job.
And anyone who sees him and Lisa reduced to tears in episode four would see he certainly had his heart in it.
Speaking at the official launch of the show at Diddly Squat Farm yesterday, Jeremy said: “On this show I don’t have to pretend to be someone else.
“You see, on The Grand Tour, Richard Hammond isn’t as stupid as he’s made out to be, and I’m not as bombastic as I’m made out to be, and James May isn’t quite as boring as he’s made out to be.
It was absolutely horrific at the time, and we had another calamity with them just the other day, but by and large they’re now going OK
“So you’re playing a caricature, you’re playing a role, and you’re there to provoke and be stupid. But here you haven’t got any of that, so we’re just ourselves.
“It’s incredibly relaxing — it is effortless. The TV side of it is a piece of cake, but the farming isn’t.”
But Jeremy reckons that it is more real than most shows because they couldn’t plan anything if they wanted to.
Jeremy said: “It’s genuine reality television, but it’s not hosted by someone in purple spectacles and a zany jacket. It’s absolutely real — what you see actually happens and none of it was planned.
“On The Grand Tour everything was planned — and I mean literally everything.
‘Absolutely real’
“It was like: ‘Richard, move your eyebrow THAT much.’
“But nothing is planned on this — I have no script and every single day we meet to do filming, we have a vague idea of what we need to do — like I need to redrill this field, for example.
“And I can actually guarantee we’ll do something completely different because the weather’s changed or a fence has fallen down, whatever it might be.
“And you never, ever know what you’re going to do.”
Jeremy is one of a long line of celebrities who’ve moved into this rural corner of Oxfordshire and earned themselves the nickname of “The Chipping Norton Set” in reference to the nearby town.
Among the most high-profile residents in recent years have been David and Victoria Beckham, Amanda Holden and Simon Cowell — though none of them have taking up farming as a serious career.
In contrast, Jeremy and Kaleb are rather proud of the fact that the TV presenter has a genuine farm, which he decides to exploit to the max in the latest episodes.
He says: “While I do love the trailer for series three, it does slightly give the impression that we’re now doing ‘hobby farming’, which we’ve tried to avoid.
“Kaleb is very keen that we showcase proper farming — and we do show proper farming.
“It’s not a little 20 acres, or a petting zoo.”
It’s absolutely real — what you see actually happens and none of it was planned
That doesn’t necessarily mean that Jeremy doesn’t adopt some unusual methods.
Viewers will see him getting a hovercraft to fly over crops to fertilise them in a bid to prevent creating tractor tracks which can’t be used for growing crops.
Jeremy also has ten goats which he keeps as living lawnmowers, but has only got males so they can’t breed, which completely bewilders Kaleb.
Probably the most hilarious scene is when Jeremy and Lisa try to prevent breeding pigs having a menage a trois by simulating mounting a female and feeding her biscuits to distract her from a couple she wants to mate with.
They succeed, with mixed consequences.
But the most bizarre moment comes when Jeremy sees the potential for jam-making from his extensive blackberry bushes, and uses a vacuum cleaner to pluck them from the branches when they’re ready to be removed.
Amazingly, the sucking strength is perfect for picking off the ripened fruit while leaving the unripened berries behind.
He said: “I had the idea at four in the morning — and it works. I’m the ideas man. Just you wait till you get Henry hoover on your blackberry hedges — it’ll change your lives.
“I could not believe it worked, but there you are.
“If you go blackberry picking, you spend hours and hours lacerating your hands and you look down and you’ve got, like, six. So the Henry hoover was just amazing.”
I think its a very heart-warming programme
Certain farmers have been more than a tad cynical after watching the programme.
Among the random moments they called into question was when Kaleb pulled a wheely in a tractor in one episode.
Jeremy recalls: “A farmer said that it would never happen, that a tractor would do a wheely.
“But it did happen and Kaleb will tell you it did happen.”
It’s difficult to comprehend how a show about farming could have the mass appeal it has enjoyed since it launched.
Last year it was the only programme among the top 40 most-watched in Britain which was only available to stream.
It’s an incredible achievement as the biggest shows tend to benefit from being viewed on-the-night with terrestrial broadcasters as well as their catch-up ratings.
It’s also why, even though the third series has yet to arrive on Prime Video, the streaming services bosses ordered a fourth which Jeremy and his crew are currently filming.
And he seems to understand why it has consistently huge appeal.
Jeremy said: “I think its a very heart-warming programme. I think it ticks every single box television should tick — it’s funny, it’s informative, and it’s charming.
“Watching this show is a very nice way to spend your time.”
- Clarkson’s Farm 3 is available on Prime Video from May 3.
