Woman Says Her Fiancé Fought With Her Over a Simple Request About His Car, Others Warn It 'Should Be a Dealbreaker'

A woman was concerned after getting into a fight with her fiancé over his car. Now some are warning her that her “reasonable request” and his response should be a “dealbreaker” in their relationship.

Taking to Reddit’s “Am I the A–hole” forum, the woman said that she’d been living with her partner for six months. They had one “recurring argument,” which had to do with cleaning.

“He will clean but he does a sloppy job since he wants to just get the ‘chores’ over with. I am much more thorough with cleaning and I find myself picking up after him all the time,” she wrote.

They got into an argument relating to his cleaning his car, leaving her with some concerns.

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In her post, she wrote, “We are going on a road trip in a few days and will be taking his car. His car is very dirty…it smells bad and there is garbage everywhere. I asked him to clean up the garbage in his car which would take maximum half hour and even offered to help him and he said no.”

“His stance is that he doesn’t need to clean his car just because I asked him to. He kept arguing with me asking me, ‘if this is the hill I want to die on,’ ” she said.

After reading her situation, many people rushed to the comments section with advice and words of warning.

If you stay with him, you’ll be cleaning up after him the rest of your life,” one Redditor said, while another wrote, ” Why dont you ask him if this is hill HE wants to die on?!”

Describing him as “egotistical and stupid,” another person wrote that “cleaning up a car full of garbage before a road trip is an entirely reasonable request.”

Someone warned that “this should be a dealbreaker,” explaining, “This shows several red flags: laziness, weaponized incompetence, lack of caring about your feelings, willingness to put the responsibility of chores and mental loads onto you.”

“If you marry this man, this is who you are marrying and it will not get better. If you have children with this man, it will be 100% worse per child you have and you will also be taking on more of the work in other areas of parenting. This issue is way deeper than what he’s minimizing it down to,” they said.

Seemingly in agreement, someone commented that they always watch how people respond when presented with “reasonable requests.”

“Asking someone, especially someone you’re planning on marrying, to clean out their car in preparation for a road trip falls squarely into the ‘reasonable request’ category,” they said.

Continuing, they wrote, “So like, why? Why is he refusing to do something that is wholly reasonable? At this point, I’d be wondering how he’s going to treat your shared living space once you’re married. Is he gonna leave his laundry all over the bedroom and expect you to pick it up? These are questions I’d be asking myself.”

Another person responded very directly, writing, “Do you REALLY want to marry such a stubborn, filthy man, you’ll be cleaning up after, the rest of your life? Just sayin’…”