Melissa Auf der Maur, former bassist of Hole and Smashing Pumpkins, details time in Chicago in new book

A beer bottle, a brazen drunk act and Billy Corgan forever changed Melissa Auf der Maur’s life.

“I would never have believed it then if you’d told me that, one day, Billy would have more influence on my life than anyone other than my parents,” she writes in her book, “Even the Good Girls Will Cry: A ‘90s Rock Memoir,” released March 17 (hers and Corgan’s shared birthday).

Across 400 pages, the bassist best known for her roles in Hole and The Smashing Pumpkins discusses her time and travels in one of the most pivotal decades of rock music.

For her, it all began on July 23, 1991, when The Smashing Pumpkins played an early show in her hometown of Montreal. Auf der Maur, a budding musician and cassette tape DJ at the time, was in the crowd, transfixed. Her inebriated roommate Bruce, however, was not a fan and hurled a beer bottle at Corgan’s guitar, leading to a fight between the two men and an embarrassed Auf der Maur apologizing to Corgan “on behalf of Montreal.”

The exchange kicked off a fast friendship and mentorship. Corgan, whom she lovingly referred to as her “spiritual cowboy,” would go on to recommend Auf der Maur to his ex-girlfriend Courtney Love in 1994 for a five-year gig in Hole before poaching her to join the Pumpkins for a short stint in 1999-2000. (Afterwards, Auf der Maur went solo and then eventually quit music in 2011 as she welcomed her daughter, River.)

Coming back to Chicago Tuesday night for a conversation about her new book, held at Salt Shed’s Three Top Lounge as part of Chicago Humanities Fest, was a full-circle moment for Auf der Mar. Not just the Corgan connection, but “I always believed Chicago is the coolest next to Seattle,” Auf der Maur told the Sun-Times in an interview before the event. “Not to mention Touch and Go is my favorite label from the ’90s,” she added of the local imprint.

Though Auf der Maur never got to spend a ton of time living here (the Pumpkins played 190 shows in that one year), Chicago was very much an impactful part of her story. “You’re the only city that gets its own chapter other than Montreal,” she joked with the crowd, reading from the part of the book that details Hole’s memorable concert at the Metro in October 1994. It was on the “Live Through This” tour, at a devastating time that Love was mourning the near-simultaneous losses of her husband Kurt Cobain and previous Hole bassist Kristen Pfaff, and the media was swarming around the band waiting to pick up on any clickbait moments from the live-wire, grieving widow.

ABC News sent a five-camera professional team to shoot the Metro gig, and for her, watching it again on YouTube “illuminated everything for me,” Auf der Maur told the Sun-Times, “in terms of what the world wanted from Courtney or was projecting on Courtney and what our band represented.”

It’s the only outside material Auf der Maur used to write her book besides her own memories, sharp from documenting everything during that decade of touring. Also an erstwhile photographer, she would shoot one roll of film each day, with many of the candid images included in “Even the Good Girls Will Cry.” In September, a companion photo book, “My ‘90s Rock Photographs,” will also be released alongside a touring photography exhibition that will begin in Toronto.

Writing her memoir, said Auf der Maur, came at a time when she had “enough perspective, emotional healing and emotional objectivity on a situation” that swirled with addiction, death, changing tides in culture and a pervasive fight by women to be part of the scene. Part of her mission, too, as she told the book tour crowd, was to “reframe Courtney and all misunderstood women for all time.”

The passages about Love and her daughter, Frances Bean Cobain, are some of the most harrowing in the book, though the Hole front woman and others profiled, including Corgan, Drew Barrymore (who was dating Hole guitarist Eric Erlandson) and Dave Grohl (Auf der Maur’s ex) gave their blessing. In recent weeks, Barrymore has had Auf der Maur on hertalk show and Corgan invited the bassist to appear on his podcast,“The Magnificent Others.”

“It was the happiest reunion ever. Drew, Courtney and Billy — all three of those people lived tough and tense lives, and all in one month it was literally hugs and ‘I love you’ to all of them, making for some happy ’90s endings,” Auf der Maur said.

Love, in particular, has been piping up quite a bit in Auf der Maur’s social media channels, with some veiled comments leading many to think a Hole reunion could be in the works. “There is no answer,” Auf der Maur confirmed. “But she’s got that new record coming out, so if she does go out on tour and wants to do things, I’m open to conversations.”