Gen Z is feeling nostalgic for a life they never knew

• FX's hit show "Love Story" offers a nostalgic glimpse of 1990s New York romance.
• Gen Z's fascination shows a longing for pre-Internet simplicity and connection.
• Nostalgia-driven trends have risen as Gen Z seeks comfort and inspiration through analog moments.

Early in FX's hit show "Love Story," an extraordinary scene takes place.

John F. Kennedy Jr. rolls up on his bicycle to meet Carolyn Bessette for their first date. She's strolling out — she tells him he could've called the restaurant to let her know he was running 20 minutes late.

It's a simple moment, but one that feels unthinkable today, when they might have exchanged dozens of logistical texts, or she would've sent frenzied back-and-forth messages with friends debating if he's ghosting her or not. As a late 20's dater in New York City, it was like watching a slightly alien, distorted version of my own reality: A New York City with some of the same long-standing restaurants and subway stations, but marked by a very clear absence — not a phone in sight.

While not the Stone Age, the '90s low-tech life is part of the show's appeal to other Gen Zers and me. Since many of us don't remember the '90s — if you look across the Hudson to Brooklyn in the series, you can see me being pushed in a stroller — it's all a beautiful fantasy of an analog life we'll never know.

Clay Routledge, a psychologist who has written about and researched nostalgia and leads the Human Flourishing Lab at the Archbridge Institute, said the bittersweet feeling can transcend our own memories. In his research, he's seen younger generations report high levels of nostalgia for a pre-Internet past they never inhabited. Art, photos, movies, books, and TV shows can help create a collective nostalgia — look no further than Gen Zers devouring shows like "Friends." It's comforting; we use it to reassure ourselves or to find inspiration and wisdom, Routledge said. That's true even when we reminisce about moments that we haven't lived through.

"It turns out people can do that not just from their own memories, but from sampling the shared cultural memories and experiences in a variety of ways, from talking to people, talking to older generations and hearing their stories, to watching TV or film," Routledge said.

The obsession with "Love Story" — which has broken streaming records for FX's limited series and already sparked lookalike contests — might also be a sign of the times. We turn to nostalgia when the present seems uncertain; in a time riddled with AI anxiety, skyrocketing costs, and increasingly online social lives, it makes sense that Gen Zers might seek solace in a '90s New York that's more Kodak than iPhone.

"One common theme that comes up a lot is feeling overwhelmed or distracted or pulled in lots of different directions with these technologies," Routledge said. Moments like that first date of the leading couple show a level of intentionality and trust that's harder to come by in a world awash with technological options and choice overload.

"There seems to be a real thirst to make things more human-driven and less augmented by technological assistance. And again, I don't think that's because people are like, 'Oh, the technology is bad,'" Routledge said. "It's more like, at some level, we want to get to the point where the technology is almost in the background, and it can be human to human again."

What nostalgia tells us about how Gen Z hopes to shape the future

As often happens with any generation, Gen Zers are soothing their anxiety with consumption — the plastic headband Bessette wears, for example. Nostalgia and analog-based products and marketing have exploded over the last few years, and "Love Story" is no exception. Ashley Bauchman, a 34-year-old producer and creator in Los Angeles, sees a sublimation of Gen Z's desire for community. Buying a headband means feeling like a part of a group, but it's still an imitation of the real thing.

"When I find myself spiraling on, 'oh, I should buy this thing, or I should get these clothes, or I need to revamp,' one of the main things that works the best is just taking a pause and thinking to myself, when is the last time I hung out outside with one of my friends?" Bauchman said.

She's noticed that among some of the Gen Zers she encounters online, there's a tendency to be almost self-isolating, opting to "protect their peace" or go to bed early rather than socialize. To be a part of a community or adopt a more analog lifestyle, you have to be willing to inconvenience yourself a bit.

Of course, no headband will throw Gen Zers back in time, or scrub away cellphones. Externally, the economic factors that allowed New York City denizens to live downtown or afford more nights out are far gone. In 2000, the median gross rent was $705 in New York City, which would come to around $1,288 in 2024 dollars. That's well below the actual median gross rent of $1,811 in 2024.

The Gen Zers who love to fixate on a pre-Internet past don't want to throw all technology into the Hudson. The ravenous response around the show might instead point to a certain hunger from the next generation of adults. Look no further than the rise of analog bags, anti-social media events, and the Gen Z desire to pick up tactile hobbies.

"A lot of young people are saying the future we want is a future where technology is present and continues to make our lives easier, but where we are more present, where we're not just passively staring at screens, where we're actually engaging in the world," Routledge said. "So it seems to me that Gen Z is more motivated to not reverse digital technology, but to build the future in which that technology takes a backseat."