Internet ‘explodes’ after being overwhelmed with Chuck Norris facts
The Internet, long thought capable of handling anything after proving its ability to run Google, Facebook, Amazon, Youtube and Walmart programs simultaneously, suddenly crashed into oblivion on Friday with the explosion of “Chuck Norris Facts” that erupted.
Actually, that’s just one of those “Facts” making the rounds after the world learned it had lost Norris, an honored author, longtime martial arts champion, superstar of television and film, devoted father, husband to Gena, a Democrat who turned conservative when that party went too far, and humble comedian.
Norris wrote hundreds of columns that appeared on WorldNetDaily, explaining his life values, talking about those people like Ronald Reagan that he knew and more.
He’s known for his charitable works, teaching thousands of children the martial arts and giving them goals in life, and a hundred other good works.
But what he is KNOWN for are the “Chuck Norris Facts.”
Those are statements that seem impossible.
This is a hilarious montage of Chuck Norris jokes.
If you think about it, he really was the first 80’s action hero and pretty much started the genre of 80’s and 90’s action movies. pic.twitter.com/zK81wkczGs
— Don Keith (@RealDonKeith) March 20, 2026
But posted online was a montage where it was revealed:
- That the boogeyman checks under his bed for Chuck Norris.
- That Chuck Norris’ reflection won’t even look him in the eye.
- When Chuck Norris gets in the water, the sharks get out.
- When Chuck Norris goes hiking, the grizzlies look out for him.
- Chuck Norris wears a hat to protect the sun.
- Medicine takes Chuck Norris to feel better.
Here are more “Facts.”
RIP Chick Norris:
FACTS about Chuck Norris:
1. Chuck Norris doesn’t do push-ups…
He pushes the Earth down.⸻
2.When Chuck Norris enters a room,
he doesn’t turn the lights on — he turns the dark off.⸻
3.Chuck Norris counted to infinity.
Twice.⸻
4.Death once had a… pic.twitter.com/9KuwhevkVG
— Brian Krassenstein (@krassenstein) March 20, 2026
Others are that he doesn’t do pushups, he pushes the Earth down.
When he enters a room he turns the dark off.
He counted to infinity. Twice.
On meeting Chuck Norris, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said he would no longer need his security detail.
When Prime Minister @netanyahu met Chuck Norris: “Now that you’re here, I don’t need my security people anymore.” pic.twitter.com/HTXqFkO9rn
— Dr. Eli David (@DrEliDavid) March 20, 2026
And he can stop a chainsaw with his bare hand.
Chuck Norris could stop a chainsaw with his bare hands.
May his memes live forever! pic.twitter.com/3xNtjvIl74
— Don Keith (@RealDonKeith) March 20, 2026
He was considered a national security asset, with then-candidate Mike Huckabee explaining he would secure the border with “Chuck Norris.”
Forcing everyone in the office to watch the ad from 2008 where Mike Huckabee recited Chuck Norris facts. pic.twitter.com/0e9YgHVteJ
— Blake Neff (@BlakeSNeff) March 20, 2026
Glenn Beck joined with the note that shortly after Norris’ death, “The Grim Reapter was found dead.”
The Icon, Chuck Norris, has passed away.
Rest in peace, my friend. I’ll see you in Heaven.
Also, in breaking news, the Grim Reaper was found dead after attempting to take Chuck Norris to the afterlife. pic.twitter.com/jCcbkIWdjJ
— Glenn Beck (@glennbeck) March 20, 2026
Even in his filmed fight scenes, humor never was very far away. In one scene, he broke an opponent’s nose, fixed it, and then broke it again because it looked better that way.
The iconic Broken Nose scene from Walker, Texas Ranger is peak Chuck Norris
He breaks the guy’s nose, resets it, then breaks it again because “it looks better the other way.” Absolute legend. Classic 90s action gold.
RIP Chuck. pic.twitter.com/rzaP7Ep1Ey
— Alec Lace (@AlecLace) March 20, 2026
He told one of his own “Facts” during a cameo during “The Expendables 2.”
RIP Legend
The Expendables 2 (2012): Chuck Norris telling a Chuck Norris joke in a movie featuring Chuck Norrispic.twitter.com/lS63KbAZgu
— Cloudbet (@Cloudbet) March 20, 2026
The satire site The Babylon Bee was not to be outdone:
‘Fear Not!’ Says Chuck Norris To Calm Trembling Angels https://t.co/11xKJ4bgS2 pic.twitter.com/i8fwloytn6
— The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) March 20, 2026
It “reported”:
HEAVEN — A group of seraphim guarding the gates of Heaven was terrified yesterday by the sudden appearance of legendary martial artist and action star Chuck Norris, who passed into glory at the earthly age of 86.
“Fear not!” Norris reportedly said to calm the trembling angels after he arrived in a flash of bright light. “I bring you good tidings of great joy. I have roundhouse kicked my mortal coil to join you here in Heaven.”
The angels briefly appeared to kneel in his presence before Norris stopped them and urged them to worship God alone. “You must not do that!” he shouted at them. “I am a man. A fearsome, dangerous man, yes, but a man nonetheless. Worship God.”
Witnesses said Heaven was abuzz with Norris’s arrival, with everyone appearing to be on their best behavior to avoid getting on his bad side. “We all know not to mess with him,” said one heavenly resident. “We’re here in incorruptible bodies, but we’re all pretty sure he can still hurt us if he wants to. It’s great to have him here, honestly, but I have noticed that a lot of the ‘tough guys’ around here have suddenly gotten really quiet.”
Heroes from biblical times were eager to get Norris’s autograph. “I’m a big fan,” said King David. “Yeah, I took out Goliath with one stone and a sling, but come on… this is Chuck Norris. He’s on another level.”
At publishing time, tickets to an announced MMA fight between Norris and Samson had already sold out.
He picked Chuck Norris. Mistake. https://t.co/6uVNACLeQe pic.twitter.com/FyvxNYdCR8
— erias (@xerias_x) March 20, 2026
Some comments turned more toward the serious:
Donald Trump meets Chuck Norris at Wrestlemania VII in Los Angeles, California, March 1991.
35 years ago this week.
Rest in peace, Chuck. pic.twitter.com/DmT4u2FpBu
— johnny maga (@johnnymaga) March 20, 2026
I honestly thought Chuck Norris would live forever! pic.twitter.com/phY6mGH4xF
— Vince Langman (@LangmanVince) March 20, 2026
And Norris himself proved he, too, could be serious.
Chuck Norris was once asked why he’s a conservative and said he use to be a democrat but switched to the Republican party because the democrats got too far off the trail and lost all reality of what America stood for.
He was right.
RIP to the legendary Chuck Norris. pic.twitter.com/5ZeLDVhGBU
— Bridgett Fertig (@LightOnLiberty) March 20, 2026
Son Dakota Norris said, “‘Dad, it’s hard to find the right words for this, but I’ll do my best. You’ve been the man I looked up to my whole life. Your generosity, your kindness, your courage, your integrity, your strength, your discipline, and your faith in the Lord were just a handful of things I always admired about you. You lived your life with purpose and with love for all people.”
Six Million Dollar Man star Lee Majors took to Instagram to share his tribute. “We lost a dear friend @chucknorris today… and my heart goes out to his family. I know the millions of fans across the world are feeling this loss too, but for me, it’s deeply personal. I had the honor of working alongside him, sharing moments I’ll never forget. He wasn’t just a legend on screen he was a kind, strong, and genuine soul off of it.”
Dolph Lundgren said, “Ever since I was a young martial artist and later getting into movies, I always looked up to him as a role model. Someone who had the respect, humility and strength it takes to be a man. We will miss you, my friend.”
Expendables costar Sylvester Stallonen wrote, “Hey Chuck… maybe you can teach the good Lord a few karate moves — I know He’ll get a kick out of them. Rest easy.”
Jean-Claude Van Damme – also in Expendables 2, said, “Deepest condolences on the passing of my friend, Chuck Norris. We knew each other from my early days, and I always respected the man he was.”