After 25 Years, Colby Donaldson Is Ready to Finish What He Started on 'Survivor 50' (Exclusive)

The bugs and humidity in the jungles of Fiji don't seem to bother Colby Donaldson. The Survivor veteran is walking around barefoot in the pre-game to the milestone 50th season, looking just at home as he prepares to face 23 other returning players. At 51, the Season 2 finalist seems more excited—and perhaps more introspective—than we’ve seen him since he first arrived on the beach 25 years ago.

For a generation of fans, Donaldson is still that quintessential All-American face of the franchise, but his legacy has long been tied to a single, million-dollar decision: choosing to take Tina Wesson to the end of The Australian Outback, and losing by one vote. While he still stands by that choice, the Texas native arrived for the game this time having done his homework. In fact, he’s been "studying the film" of his past mistakes, in hopes of fixing the "absence of social game" that led to his downfall in prior seasons.

"I had to painfully go back and watch All-Stars and then Heroes vs. Villains, and what I recognized and realized was that there were times where I didn't respect the game, and I was embarrassed by that," he exclusively told Men's Journal while on set for Season 50. "The producers knew I wasn't having fun. They knew I wasn't cooperative with them in interviews, and my game got blown apart."

Rather than blaming the edit, he points the finger at himself. "Instead of rallying and persevering in the way I do in my everyday life, and have for decades, I chose a different route and that disrespected the game, and I don't want to go out like that," Donaldson said. I don't want that to be my final season, and that doesn't have anything to do with the fans. That has to do with me and how I feel about it, and why I'm so excited to come back and get another shot."

He added, “I can assure you, I will not make the same mistakes this time. I’m much better equipped to handle final jury.”

Below, Donaldson further breaks down his preparation for the milestone season and why he’s banking on a whole new approach to finish what he started.

Men’s Journal: It’s been a minute! How does it feel to be back?

Colby Donaldson: It’s been a minute. I never thought I'd be back. And yeah, I'm more excited this time, probably, than I've ever been. Which is weird, really. And that certainly wasn't the case the second and third time I played. A ton of excitement the first time, but yeah, I was the first one to call casting and throw my hat in the ring on this.

Men’s Journal: Oh wow. You were like, "I'm ready to go."

Colby Donaldson: Yeah. And I didn't know who the casting director is now, so I had to go through multiple degrees of separation to even find his name and number. And I called him up, and I said, "Jesse [Tannenbaum], you don't know me. This is my name—Colby Donaldson—and I'm sure you're getting bombarded." This was right after [Jeff] Probst announced it was going to be a returning player season. And I said, "I'm sure you're getting bombarded and inundated with people right now, and I'm sure you're swamped. But I just wanted you to know I'd like to throw my hat in the ring, and if there's any chance, just know I'm ready to go today." And this was last summer, actually. He said, "Colby, no, I'm not getting bombarded. We hadn't even started casting 49 yet, so you're a little early."

So yeah, and then the producers joked with me about it the other day here in pregame—just the fact that I was the first. I didn't realize it at the time, but I was the first one to reach out, and that's to say that: one, I didn't know 16 years ago that the show would make it to 50. I didn't know if I'd physically be able to go. I didn't know if things in my life would allow me to go. And I sure am not going to assume that I could do it five years from now. So I sort of looked at it as, if I ever have a window to do it, this is going to be it for me, right? And the truth is, I didn't even know when I reached out to casting and told them I wanted to go—I wasn't completely clear of my reasons. I didn't know why I was compelled to go. So then I've spent the last few months, during the entire casting process, honing in on why it was important for me to come back.

It's twofold. One, to repay my debt to Survivor. I was 25 the first time I competed, and I was in a very impressionable age and era of my adult life, and it changed everything for me. There's no way I could have known that that would happen, because when I sent in my very first application on VHS tape—by the way, you know you're old school when your audition tape goes into casting in an envelope on a VHS tape—but when I sent that in, it was less than midway through Season 1, and the show had not become the juggernaut that it would ultimately be. It was not on the scope and scale that it later became. So all of us on the sophomore season had no idea what we were getting into, and it wasn't because of me or any one person; we were just part of this thing that was about to explode.

And explode it did. And so it completely changed the trajectory of my life at a time, again, when I could pivot, I could maneuver. So I didn't go into Survivor expecting to then have a career in television and have this incredible chapter of doing all the things that I did as a direct result of Survivor. But now, after 25 years from the first time I played, 16 years from the last time I played, and I'm in my 50s—so this is a time of reflection for me anyway. When I reflect back, I can't help but really notice the significance that Survivor has played, and it's permeated so many other aspects of my life, even after getting out of television, moving back to Texas, getting back to doing what I was doing when I first applied.

So there's a bit of a full-circle element going on here, and I don't think it escaped Probst and the producers. When they began talking with me to consider me for this season, I’m more like that 25-year-old that sent in that first application than I was the second and third time I played. And I think that's more intriguing for them as a player in this game.

Men’s Journal: You're more hungry for it. There aren't any ulterior motives.

Colby Donaldson: I'm here to play the game and I'm here to have the adventure and the experience. Probst always says the game is the lure, the experience is the takeaway. And that's true. It's not all about the million bucks or the grand prize. That's a big part of it, and certainly it motivates me as well. But there are other factors, too, that I look forward to, and I'm excited about playing it again. And also, as a competitor, you always want to know if you still have the edge, if the tool is still sharp, right? And quite frankly, I didn't do so well my second and third outings. So part of me wants to come back and finish the way I started. I was very proud of the way I played the first time in Australia, 25 years ago, even though I didn't win. And I know those closest to me, and even fans, were very proud of the way I played and the way things worked out.

Men’s Journal: I mean, people were naming their kids after you.

Colby Donaldson: Well, look, Sharon, that actually weighed into this. I don't spend a lot of time thinking about that because I don't like the self-centered aspect of that, but I have to acknowledge it and I have to recognize it. I told Probst this on our very first call, when the producers and Probst interviewed me for Season 50, I said, "Man, there's a real part of me that wants to go back and make those Colbys proud and make their parents proud they named them Colby." And I don't think I did that the last time. So for me, that's a big component, and I've given myself permission to acknowledge that I was a part of a very big thing at a very big time, and it has given me a lot in 25 years. So I would have said yes to coming back just out of gratitude and appreciation and respect for the game, without question. And look, as the interviewing process began for Season 50, I'm still a huge fan of the show and a student of it, but there were some seasons that I missed. So I had to go back and start studying.

Men’s Journal: Did you go back?

Colby Donaldson: Yeah, you have to. If you're preparing for competition, you've got scouting reports. You've got to watch film. But that's twofold. One, you have to watch it on your opponents, but if you're doing your diligence, you also have to go back and watch it on yourself. So I had to painfully go back and watch All-Stars and then Heroes vs. Villains. And what I recognized and realized in watching it back after all these years was that there were times where I didn't respect the game, and I was embarrassed by that.

Some of it was so subtle, I don't know that a lot of people would pick up on it as a viewer. The producers knew. The producers knew I wasn't having fun. They knew I wasn't cooperative with them in interviews and all of that. My game got blown apart on day two because my alliance was ripped apart, and I had no shot, really. But instead of rallying and persevering in the way I do in my everyday life, and have for decades, I chose a different route and that disrespected the game. I don't want to go out like that. I don't want that to be my final season, and that doesn't have anything to do with the fans. That has to do with me and how I feel about it, and why I'm so excited to come back and get another shot at it.

Men’s Journal: It seem like you're going in with a really good attitude.

Colby Donaldson: Unbelievable. I am determined to make the little sphere around me better and more positive. It’s a question of improved attitude every day. And look, Sharon, I'm not as strong as I was when I was 26. I'm not as fast. I'm not going to compete in challenges the way I did; there's no way. I'm not out of shape, but I ain't 25. There are just a lot bigger, better athletes now than there were back then, and certainly, they will be on this beach. I'm okay with that, but I bring in a ton of life experience that I didn't have at 25 or 32 or however old I was in those subsequent seasons. It's an asset. That's a tool, and it's a way. to navigate this game. There's no question my social game will be exponentially better than it ever was the first three times I played. And it cost me, Sharon. There's no question, again, in that reflection and having to go back and study film, it probably cost me a million bucks the first time, and it no question had an effect on the outcome the second and third.

Men’s Journal: You can't hate the first time. I mean, that was so iconic.

Colby Donaldson: Well, it was. It was awesome. And also, look, I worry that some of these incredible players, but one-timers, that are coming back—what I hope they realize is, regardless of how they finish, you cannot replicate your first experience on Survivor. I was on record for years saying it's a game that's truly meant to be played once because there's a degree of naivety that's so charming about it. It's so exciting when everything's brand new and it's a first time and you have no idea what's coming next. When you go back and play again or play a third time, you already know those things. So you're trying to discover that charm, and you're trying to have that same adventure, and the mistake a lot of people make is trying to replicate it. You can't. But that doesn't mean it still can't be just as exciting; it's just going to be different. And you have to find different ways to pull that value out—to pull that fun and that excitement and, most importantly, that fulfillment out. It has to be fulfilling, and that's up to you as a player to make it that.

Men’s Journal: And some of these players played so recently that I don't know if they've had the perspective.

Colby Donaldson: Yes, you hit the nail on the head. I couldn't agree more. I don't know that it's possible, and it's not their fault. They’re victims of their circumstance, which is those that are returning almost immediately. Just think about this: they've been to Fiji, they've been to this climate. They know everything there is to me without question. And I'm sure there are other old-timers that would tell you this too: this is the mildest, most benign environment I've ever played in.

Men’s Journal: Interesting.

Colby Donaldson: I haven't put on bug spray since I got here.

Men’s Journal: You're adapting.

Colby Donaldson: I don't wear shoes anywhere I go. Now, part of that is adapting, but also, Sharon, there's a little bit of psychological warfare that has Ponderosa going. It's going great, because there's no doubt everyone's paying attention. They're hyper-aware of everything that happens around them, and when they see me or a guy like Ozzy [Lusth] walk around everywhere barefoot like it's nothing, they're thinking about it. They see the fact that everyone's reaching for bug spray; they're so annoyed with the bugs in tents right now. They've never been on a beach in Panama when you have no-see-ums and sand fleas and chiggers and ticks and all those things—most of which I grew up with in Texas. So this doesn't bother me on any level, in any way. And I dare say my daily work life now at 51 is tougher than anything I'll do on this beach. This is a vacation for me. The elements are nothing.

And the 26 days is nothing. That's the other thing. It's a compressed game. Now, make no mistake, I'm not the guy that's going to sit here and say, "Oh, we had it tougher back in our day." The game is decidedly more difficult in many factors, in many ways. It's played at such a pace and such a clip—a speedy clip—that old farts like me are going to struggle to keep up. There's no question. And whereas we used to be able to relax at least for a couple of days until Tribal Council once you had voted someone out, those days are gone. It began to evolve and change even the second and third time I played, but you could still bank on having at least a day to decompress and take a breath. Now it's literally moment to moment, and that's okay, as long as you embrace it. Again, there's no way I could succeed playing a game that I've played previously. I have to adapt my game just like you have to adapt in the game moment to moment.

Men’s Journal: How do you feel about the rest of the old school players, some of whom you've played with before?

Colby Donaldson: So the old-school players that are here, it's an interesting lot. There are what, four of us from Heroes vs. Villains? You've got Stephenie [LaGrossa Kendrick], Cirie [Fields], [Benjamin] Coach [Wade], and myself. Coach was on the Villains. Cirie was definitely not in the alliance that Stephenie and Tom Westman and I were in. So even though Cirie was a Hero, we didn't have an opportunity to really play together or connect much. Now I regret that, and so part of me is very excited to see Cirie here, and I hope I get to play with her, because I think there was a missed opportunity.

She's a legend. Look, Cirie is probably the biggest legend on the beach here because she's so masterful at not just this game, but she's gone on to play other games. She has what it takes to do well in these types of competitions. Call it what you want. She may not dominate in challenges, but it doesn't matter; she finds a way to make it to the end almost every time. And so I think that puts a big target on her, but I for one look forward to hopefully getting to work with her, as I do Coach.

I think Coach should have been on the Heroes. I can guarantee you, when he sits in this chair, he will tell you he should have been on the Heroes beach last time. He'll probably also refer to himself in the third person and definitely call himself the Dragon Slayer at some point. But that's all what we love about Coach. There's no question. And look, Coach is in my vintage. He's in his 50s now, as is Cirie. Stephenie's not far behind. So I think we all have a different perspective than we did when we were younger. I think we all still take the game seriously, but hopefully, we all don't take ourselves as seriously.

Men’s Journal: You respect the game, but you're having fun.

Colby Donaldson: No doubt. I think you hit the nail on the head. I think you can count on the old era players—and let's throw Jenna Lewis[-Doughtery] in here too, because she's the OG from Season 1. I think you can almost take it to the bank that we are going to have fun. We're here to have fun, and that doesn't mean we're going to lay down and let some newbie take the game, but we're going to make sure we have fun, because I think a lot of us have the perspective. And with that comes the realization that maybe we didn't have enough fun the last time.

Men’s Journal: And especially in a returning player season, you're like, "Listen, I've had the experience where I'm a new player, and I had the experience where maybe it didn't work out." Is this is an experience where you could just have fun?

Colby Donaldson: I think so. And I think by having fun, it will translate to success. I really do. I’ll also tell you I'm not one of these that's coming into this as a vintage player and saying we're going to take out all the newbies. I'm actually super stoked to get to know them quickly and figure out who in not just the New Era, but just some of the brand-new players... I'd love to figure out a way to play with one or several. One, because I could definitely gain some knowledge from them and I could use their help in a lot of ways, but also I think, referring back to that life experience we talked about, I think I could be an asset to them—a balance. I think I could help them navigate the game and navigate some of the other players, and maybe have some objectivity and see and hear things that maybe they're not seeing and hearing because they're too hyper-focused on where the hidden idol is or what the next challenge is going to be. I just think there are certain things... there are many things in this game that are out of our control on any given season, but you can bet your ass on Season 50, there are going to be even more elements that are complete surprises and that are different than we've ever encountered. And so the idea of trying to predict that, to me, is wasted energy, and it's ridiculous.

Men’s Journal: Speaking of the new players, some of them have a few people from their seasons coming in with them. Thoughts on that?

Colby Donaldson: Well, if we're referencing people coming in in groups, then that would mean the biggest target is on those of us from Heroes vs. Villains. There are four of us. So we hope there's a workaround for that, because I would venture to guess Cirie and Stephenie and Coach feel the same way. We are targets because we're considered a foursome, even though we're not. I haven't spoken to any one of them in 16 years. Haven't seen any of them in 16 years. So it's not as though we vacation together or we're close or tight. My tight friendships are with Ethan [Zohn] and Tom Westman and Tina [Wesson] and Boston Rob [Mariano]—none of whom are here.

But if you put our foursome there and you go, "Okay, well, we're going to put a target on them," then you also have to look at the players like Angelina [Keeley] and Mike White and Christian [Hubicki], who come from a season. Any one of those would probably be a target individually, but you combine them together, there's no question. And out of those, I think Angelina probably is going to have her work cut out for her. I think she's going to have a target on her, and rightfully so. She's a hell of a player, but she's got a lot of people concerned.

I think your Season 48 crew—I mean, what Kamilla [Karthigesu] and Kyle [Fraser] did is still probably the best gameplay I've seen in the history of the show in terms of how they navigated their way through that game. Unbeknownst to everyone, being so tight and keeping it quiet and then springing at the last minute—even how the last Tribal Council went—it was all awesome to watch. They're both here, and he won. How can you say they don't have a target to break them up?

And then you go with Kyle, and so you now have to put Dee [Valladares] in there as another winner. Winners... look, here's the deal: you have people with a mindset that you keep the winners around because they're shields and no one's going to vote to give them the money again, so you can take them all the way to the end and you end up beating them because nobody wants them to win. Well, look, I was on a season where we gave Sandra [Diaz-Twine] her second win, and you could not have convinced me prior to Heroes vs. Villains that I would vote for Sandra. Really, I didn't have respect for her game until I played with her.

Probst always says it: you can call the shots all you want from home on your couch watching the show, but you have no idea what it's like when you're in the game, in that moment. Even as a former player, you can't watch another season and go, "Well, that was a bad move; I would have done this or I would have done that." You have to be on the beach, living it moment to moment, and seeing the players and how they play the game. And so when you're faced with that final decision at Tribal Council, it not only is weighed by how they've conducted themselves and how they've played the game to get where they are, but it also has to do with the two other people that are sitting next to them. Of course. So only a fool says taking a winner to the end with you as a shield is a smart play, because Kyle will end up winning this thing again, or Dee will end up winning this thing again. You watch. I think it's foolish to allow those two or any winners to make it far enough in the game to strike. And so for my money, there needs to be an early target on them.

Men’s Journal: So in the early game with the challenges, are you going to try to go out there and be that sort of challenge beast, or play more low-key?

Colby Donaldson: To me, under the radar is playing from the bottom. And I don't want to play from the bottom. I literally want to play from the middle. First of all, my ego doesn't need the stroke of dominating the challenges. Second of all, I'm smart and humble enough to admit I will not be the dominant force on that beach in any challenge—whether it's a puzzle or whether it's endurance or strength. There are just too many weapons amassed for me to be the standout. But that's actually a strength of mine. I like operating from the middle where I'm not the fastest but I'm not the slowest; I'm not the strongest but I'm not the weakest. I may not be the smartest, but I'm damn sure not gonna be the dumbest. And so that's a space I'm now, at 51, comfortable operating in, and I believe that's where I'll be perceived. I'm not going to be perceived as the biggest threat on that beach. There's no way. By anyone. I would think the majority of players here would put me in the bottom half.

Men’s Journal: Maybe good for you, Colby.

Colby Donaldson: It's going to be great for me. You're exactly right. I can only hope that they have studied film the way I have coming into this, because look: there's newbies, there's young players that don't even know who I am, that didn't watch any of those seasons back then. Hell, two-thirds of the crew doesn't even know who I am because they weren't even born. There are players in this game that weren't born the first time I played. All-Stars was almost a throwaway; few people have seen that. Heroes vs. Villains more so. But again, it's to my advantage if they have. It's to my advantage if they've gone back and watched that because they saw a guy that just didn't do well.

Now the takeaway I have is—get a load of this: the first time I played, I made it 42 out of 42 days. I'm the only person on this beach who's ever competed 42 days, and I did so by dominating in the challenges. The third time I played, I also made it to the final episode—37 out of 39 days—but performed terribly in challenges in a lot of people's eyes. I knew early in that game things weren't going my way. I knew when my alliance got blown apart it was going to be tough. Then I knew I didn't have what we call the Survivor fortune on your side. I didn't have any luck, and you got to have luck in this game. I wasn't catching any breaks.

So I had to find a way to get through the game without luck and without the performance that I had relied on before, and I managed to do that in a very different manner because I was perceived by no one as a threat. They were picking off Heroes left and right around me, even after the merge. One, they assumed I gave up, and a lot of that was by design. I put off the attitude that I had completely succumbed to...

Men’s Journal: You didn't want to be there.

Colby Donaldson: Yep, yep. And so it was a strategy of mine, and I talked about it in my interviews, and it propelled me through the game. I also said in the interviews: "This will work for a while, but there will be a time where I have to win a challenge." The Villains were going to get rid of me at some point because the jury was stacking up with Heroes at that point, and so they knew they didn't want to face me in the very end. I knew there would be a moment where I had to perform, and I lost that challenge, and that was the big bummer for me in that season. It wasn't how things played out up to that point; it was that I couldn't execute when I needed it most—the final challenge. So again, that's part of the drive of why I'm back.

Men’s Journal: What do you think about these 49 players? How do you approach them?

Colby Donaldson: I think the Season 49 players that have literally just turned around and come back... no one knows anything about them. I think they're completely ripe for aligning. I think they're phenomenal targets to go and build relationships with because they're not going to have a lot of friends on the beach. They're lone wolves in a lot of ways, which is what I am. I don't go to the Survivor get-togethers and viewing parties—not because I’m in any way not proud of all that Survivor represents to me, but it's just never been a part of my life to do that. And so I don't have relationships with many people outside the game. And as I mentioned, the only ones I am friends with are not here. So I'm a bit of a lone wolf on this beach. I think those season 49 players are going to be the same way, and I think they're going to be looking for people to connect with and to ally with. And so to me, there's opportunity there with those two new players.

Men’s Journal: Who do you want on your starting tribe, and who do you not?

Colby Donaldson: I hate to judge anyone. I've been asked this in interviews before—not today, but I'm saying in the past—about different players, and I've always reserved my judgment for those I've played with, because then I know. Like, I know what type of person Russell [Hantz] is because I've played with him, so it's tough to judge him without... however, there are a couple of threats and a couple of people that I don't believe I will trust in any circumstance. Q [Burdette] is one of those, and I just don't know that I could trust that guy. I think Angelina is going to be a tricky, sneaky player, and Kamilla is a wildcard. She is tough to read. She's incredibly smart; we all know how good she is at puzzles and a lot of different types of challenges. I think Kamilla is a wildcard. And I think this girl, Savannah [Louie], from the latest season is a wildcard. It'll be interesting to see what happens. But damn, is it gonna be fun. I mean, is this gonna be amazing or what? And then Joe [Hunter]... and so the two guys I'm super stoked to play with, even though I should be intimidated as hell, are Joe and Jonathan [Young]. I mean, Jonathan...

Men’s Journal: I haven't seen him yet, but I heard he's huge.

Colby Donaldson: If the camera adds 10 pounds, the beach in Fiji adds 40. This dude is a monster among men. He is like a comic book superhero. And I love it. I cannot wait to get on the beach with this dude and just watch him. I feel like I'm a fan. And Joe, too. Joe's a stud. I can't wait to connect with him. I think he's going to be a super easy dude to get along with. I also think—here's a little strategy for you—I think Joe and I think Jonathan, even though they're New Era players from very recent seasons (Joe's more so than Jonathan, and Joe's older than Jonathan), but I think they're old souls. I think Joe and Jonathan are going to wind up connecting with some of us old era players and I think there could be some alliances there.

Men’s Journal: You know how Joe played—very loyal. And that's kind of an old-school mentality, right?

Colby Donaldson: Kind of an old-school mentality. And he made it work with Eva all the way to the end. Didn't get many votes, but...and I think it'd be interesting to see how that weighs on Joe, right? Coming back for a second time, having sat through a jury interview and then seeing the votes come in and he only got one vote. This guy could have a burning fire in him that we haven't seen. We could get a very different Joe this time because of that.

Men’s Journal: My last question is: If you do get to the end again—you've been in this position before where you've had to explain your game and all that—have you even thought about that? Are you like, "Let me just get there, and then I'll worry about it later"?

Colby Donaldson: I'll worry about it later in terms of, like, what I'm gonna say to the jury and how I'm gonna play this. I think I'm much better equipped to handle final jury. I love the question, and I'll and I'll tell you this, if you'll oblige me just a second here, in going back and studying and looking at film, I obviously had to look at the bad seasons, but I had to go back and watch Australia again. What I found interesting, because you can imagine, in 25 years, I've been blamed a lot for giving up a million dollars for choosing Tina instead of Keith [Famie]. I still stand by that decision. The mistake I made was how I handled Jerri Manthey. And when I look back and this, this was a mistake I made in Australia. I didn't want to get rid of Jerri when we did, I was outnumbered by Keith and Tina–the majority ruled–and so we had to vote her out at Final Tribal. Jerri was hurt. We knew she was hurt. I had hurt her feelings. She was crushed because she was out of the game, but she also had her heart crushed a little bit because we had a flirty thing going on. I had an opportunity at that Final Tribal to make things right with Jerri, and she stood up there and asked me to explain my actions and several things. And because I didn't believe there was any way I could get her vote, I arrogantly chose not to answer her. It was one of the biggest tactical errors I've ever made, because not only did it cost me her vote, and I lost by one vote.

Maybe if I said the right thing in that Tribal Council, I could have gained her vote. But Sharon, what's worse is she ends up on the beach in Panama when we played All-Stars, and when she votes me out that night, she looks at the camera with my name on the parchment, and she said, "Is this a revenge vote? You bet your ass it is." So she was responsible for my outing the second time I played, and what happens? She shows up at Heroes vs. Villains. So I've got to contend with Jerri two more times. Now you talk about a fatal error. So that's that's how much I've gone back and studied the errors of my way. Because I had a chance to maybe salvage things with Jerri, or at least explain to her and help her understand that I wasn't trying to get rid of her. It's Keith and Tina, and maybe then she decides not to vote for Tina and votes for me. Who knows? We'll never know, but I can assure you, I will not make the same mistakes this time.

The interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Related: Emily Flippen Reveals Why She Almost Hoped 'Survivor 50' Wouldn’t Call Her (Exclusive)