Woman Worries Being Maid of Honor in Friend's Wedding Will be 'Kiss of Death' After Seeing a Massive Bill

A woman was left confused and with a massive bill after her friend seemingly lied about what was expected of being maid of honor at her wedding.

Taking to Reddit’s popular “Wedding Shaming” forum, a woman said that it was getting “complicated” and expensive to stand up by the bride on her big day.

She explained that despite initial hesitations, she agreed to be the maid of honor. Now, she’s worried if might be the “kiss of death” for their friendship.

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In her post she said that she had “a long history” with the bride. However, they’re “at very different places in life.”

She admitted to being “somewhat hesitant” after her friend asked her to be a part of her wedding party but said that she ultimately agreed after the bride insisted that she was looking for a “non-traditional” maid of honor. The bride reportedly didn’t even want a bachelorette party.

After agreeing to accept the role, the Redditor said that she still planned on putting some sort of party together for the bride. However, what she didn’t expect was that another woman would step in and start to organize something.

“Fast-forward a couple months, and suddenly another friend of hers ‘would love to help out with the bachelorette’. Mind you, this friend is not even part of the wedding party, and they’ve known each other for almost two years,” she wrote, adding that the woman “took it upon herself to create several vision boards and shopping lists for the event.”

The party rapidly got expensive, with the maid of honor saying that she was expected to pay $700 “on top of what I’ll be paying for my MOH dress and a wedding gift.”

“I’m currently in school and the only one [in] the group that doesn’t have a full time job. My friend seems really into the whole thing and now I’m wondering — why the big speech about being a ‘non-traditional MOH’ if this is what she wanted all along? Does she not notice that her friend is over stepping? It feels like a competition at this point,” she wrote.

While she didn’t want to steal attention from the bride or come across as “bratty,” she was worried about how to get the other woman to stop overstepping.

Concluding, she wrote, “I’ve heard that being the maid of honour is like the ‘kiss of death’ for many friendships, and I’m starting to see why people think that.”

Taking to the comments section, other Redditors were split on the situation.

Some came out in support of the original poster.

“It continues to completely baffle me how some people expect this of their wedding parties, you’re asking someone to stand up with you and celebrate your special day, not shell out nearly a grand for a party about someone else and a dress they probably won’t wear again,” one wrote.

They continued, adding, “OP, if this was a true friend they would be sympathetic to your situation and limitations. Have you brought this up at all with your friend?”

Others were less sympathetic, saying that the bride’s other friend wasn’t overstepping by throwing the party.

“Anyone is allowed to offer to throw the bride a party as a gift. It’s not something the MoH must do. And since bride seems to be going along with it, she doesn’t mind. Maybe she’s happy someone offered so that you didn’t feel obligated since she told you not to worry about it,” one person wrote.

They did commiserate with the maid of honor, saying that the woman was taking it too far with the hefty price tag.

“You need to put a stop to this now. ‘Friend, I appreciate your trying to do something special for the bride, however I have not budgeted for an extravagant party on top of my other wedding commitments, and I imagine I’m not the only one who finds $700 extra a hardship. I can afford to contribute $XYZ to this party and that is all. If you want to have a party that the group has to share the cost on, I believe we need to scale this down and find out what the group budget really is if you’re hoping for strong attendance,’ ” she proposed saying.

While another person wrote that she did not have to go to the party if she couldn’t afford it, they added that she was “obligated to handle the situation with kindness and grace — probably patience too — and to speak up early so as not to let expectations of you snowball.”