Have you ever bit into a lollipop and thought, “Man, I wish chewing this sucker made the bones in my jaw vibrate at the precise frequency of Ice Spice’s ‘Baddie Baddie’”? No? Well, it seems someone has—specifically, someone working at Lava Tech Brands, the company that just released the most baffling product of 2026 (granted, it’s only been a week): Lollipop Star, a lollipop that uses bone conduction technology to make lines like “I was just poppin’ my shit” echo through your brain the second you bite into it.
As bizarre as the whole “tiny speaker inside a blowpop” concept is, arguably the most concerning aspect is Lava Tech’s apparent belief that the primary method of lollipop consumption is biting. I mean, who bites into lollipops? Psychopaths, that’s who. Yet if you want your $8.99 worth, you’re gonna need to stick the Lollipop Star to the very back of your mouth and chomp down with your molars like you’re testing the structural integrity of your jaw. Again: psychopaths.
Of course, each Lollipop Star comes preloaded with a specific artist, flavor, and general “vibe,” like a candy-themed NFT that dissolves in your mouth instead of bankrupting you. Peach gets you Ice Spice, blueberry gets you Akon, lime gets you Armani White. There’s no way to mix and match, which means if you want Ice Spice you must also want peach, and if you don’t, that’s between you and God. Think of it like a wine pairing, except the wine is sugar, the sommelier is an Indian technology company, and the “notes” you’ll be tasting are musical ones.
The tech itself is bone conduction, which is a real thing used in headphones and hearing aids and is generally not housed inside candy. The electronics live in the stick, the sound travels through your teeth, and—according to people who tried it at the Las Vegas tech fest CES—the result is less “concert in your head” and more “yes, music is occurring somewhere in my skull,” at least if you’re in a quiet enough room. If not, then chances are you won’t hear shit. But hey, it’s the thought that counts.
Is it necessary? No. Is it good for the planet? Also no, considering the lollipops are single-use only. Is it even a particularly satisfying way to listen to music? No, a hundred times no. But, I quote the rep from Lava Tech Brands describing the product’s catalyzing motivation: “Why not?” And I guess I don’t have a good rebuttal to that one. Why not bite into a lollipop like a psychopath? Why not convince multiple celebrities to lend their voices to the inside of an artificially flavored hard candy? Why not spend nine bucks to have this undeniably novel (albeit certifiably stupid) experience at least once? But either way, it’s hard to imagine a world full of repeat customers.
It’s not a snack, not a speaker, and not quite merch; really, it feels most like an edible prank someone convinced a venture capitalist to fund. But I suppose that, at $8.99 a pop (pun intended), Lollipop Star isn’t particularly asking for loyalty—just curiosity, a working jaw, and a consumerist mindset. Hooray, innovation!