Area Man Knows When He Not Welcome In Children’s Museum

INDIANAPOLIS—Dusting off the kinetic sand from his hands as he walked with his head held high toward the exit, 34-year-old area man Benjamin Schrock reportedly told visitors and staff of Discovery Zone Children’s Museum on Tuesday that he knows when he’s not welcome. “I’ve been around the block, but never in my adult life have I experienced so many hostile glares when simply trying to splash in the sensory water playground, make Spirograph art, or dig for fossils in the dino tub,” Shrock said with an audible lump in his throat as he recounted being made to feel “strange” and “othered” when he spent an hour milking a cow statue’s rubber udders in the interactive barnyard exhibit. “That sign saying ‘All are welcome’ above the front desk? Rich. It’s funny how a place ostensibly meant to spark curiosity could be so ignorant toward an adult man who happens to enjoy hands-on activities designed for learning through play. Once I get back the ziplock bag full of quarters I paid for my ticket with, trust me, I will gladly be on my way. Now if you’ll excuse me, I believe I’m owed at least one turn on the big fire truck.” At press time, Shrock said he was dismayed to report feeling even greater undue hostility after he was removed from a bouncy house at the indoor inflatable play center.

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