Tottenham are just famous for being famous, like Gemma Collins – they should not be part of Premier League’s Big Six

SHOULD Son Heung-min end up lifting the Europa League trophy for Tottenham, it will only start the argument —  not finish it.

Win their first silverware since 2008 and some will claim Spurs are back among the Big Six, others may say English football’s ultimate fancy Dans never went away.

All while it’s a reasonable shout to suggest they should never have been in it in the first place.

Spurs did well to overcome Eintracht Frankfurt in the last eight. A cracking achievement, given how hopeless they are on the home front this season.

Monday night’s soulless surrender to Nottingham Forest came just four days after a stirring victory in Germany.

The European quest is impressive of late and hopefully they’ll go all the way and bring the trophy back next month.

If they do, it will finally end an agonising wait for glory stretching back 17 years — about the same time as it takes to walk from the ground to Seven Sisters Tube.

The 2008 League Cup final success over Chelsea is a fast-fading and flimsy claim to historical fame.

Because that came almost a decade after they had bagged the same trophy. North London’s original football club have never been serial winners.

Tottenham try to play aesthetically. They have employed a few skilful  players — David Ginola, Glenn Hoddle, Paul Gascoigne. But, ultimately, they are famous for being famous — like Gemma Collins.

So what exactly is it that makes so many people within the game class them as members of the so-called Big Six?

And in an age of fluid wealth, when clubs can be transformed overnight with foreign investment, maybe it’s time to dismiss the  idea of an elite enclave.

Defining the size of a football club has no universal measure.

It’s genuinely surprising that as football lurches towards total automation, some smart-arse has not conjured up a Stephen Hawking-style algorithm to calculate it to ten decimal places.

Capacity of ground multiplied by number of honours, then dividing that by length of time between trophies is one possibility.

Money in the bank, times international players, minus number of losses squared, all over position in the league table?

Football today bears no resemblance to the 1980s. Back then it was easier to work it out as money didn’t muddy the equation so much. Life was simpler.

Along with Manchester United, Liverpool, Arsenal and Everton, Tottenham were in a league of their own. It’s not so clear-cut now.

Behind the competition

They have a lovely, big ground.  Stamford Bridge is tiny by comparison — but Chelsea are now by far the most successful club in London.

Newcastle are awash with Saudi cash and winning this season’s Carabao Cup means they have won as much as Tottenham since 2008. Aston Villa are waking up from a decades-long coma.

They entertained us in the Champions League this season and are fighting hard to get back in it.

Manchester City were poor neighbours of United for donkey’s years. Eddie Large was their most famous fan.

Yet this season is a write-off, even though they may yet win the FA Cup and qualify for a 14th successive campaign in the Champions League.

They have billions locked away in their Arab owners’ vaults  and have amassed four Premier League titles on the trot. The Etihad isn’t the biggest mind.

Resentment

There’s been just two seasons since 2010 when Spurs finished outside the top six. Yet they are 16th and every match at their enviable new ground is tainted by resentment towards the ownership.

They will lose more league games this season than they will win.

Even if Son does get his hands on that Europa League trophy, three cups in 26 years is hardly massive. Relegated Leicester have won bigger things — the title and FA Cup — in the past decade.

It’s mind-bogglingly complex working out  who is the biggest and the best.

Maybe it’s easier switching the sums around and instead of going mad deciding who is in the Big Six, work out who isn’t. The Tottenham conundrum is much simpler then.

MARESCA CAN’T WIN

ENZO MARESCA copped it from some fans for not joining in the post-match celebrations of Chelsea’s win at Fulham.

Even though he had just been booked for overdoing it on the touchline when Pedro Neto smashed home the winner moments earlier.

There is a palpable distance between the Chelsea supporters and the reserved Italian.

I’ve yet to hear them sing his name and there is a feeling that whatever he does, they will never completely warm to him.

With Chelsea trailing at half-time on Sunday, Maresca was forced to take the long walk past the away end at Craven Cottage and was roundly labelled a “w*****” by a noisy minority.

I don’t blame him for not wanting to attend the post-match party and salute those who, 45 minutes earlier, were giving him such stick. It seems he cannot win, despite having just won.

Meanwhile, over at all-but-relegated Ipswich, boss Kieran McKenna’s name was lustily cheered when read out before they were thumped 4-0 by Arsenal. It seems he cannot lose, despite losing a lot.

ROCKET’S LAUNCHED

LEAST surprising result of the week is Ronnie O’Sullivan’s demolition of arch-adversary Ali Carter at snooker’s World Championship.

The Rocket rocked up to the Crucible, typically out of form and playing the wounded animal, claiming he would be lucky to  pot even one red ball.

A crushing 10-4 triumph later — having won five frames in   succession — and O’Sullivan is in the balls, as they say. And into the last 16.

He is someone who changes his mind on a daily basis whether or not he wants to pick up a cue. But he has seven world titles dating back to 2001.

O’Sullivan  turns 50 in December — and  there is a serious belief that he will be enjoying his eighth world crown, having surpassed the haul of his other great baize nemesis, Stephen Hendry.

ENI’S WRIGHT JIBE IS JUST WRONG

THE BEST broadcasters choose their words carefully.

Eni Aluko has not with her surprising attack on Ian Wright for “dominating” punditry in women’s football.

Ex-Chelsea star Aluko says:  “If we had a situation where there was an equal opportunity for broadcasters and coaches that there is in the women’s game  but that’s not the case. I can’t dominate the men’s game.”

No, she can’t but maybe that’s for individual reasons rather than sexism. Kelly Cates and Gabby Logan will be sharing the biggest presenting gig in football with Mark Chapman on Match of the Day from next season.

That’s two women and one man hosting the country’s flagship highlights show  covering the biggest men’s league in the world, with a vast audience.

Genuine question . . . am I missing something here?