I’m a BBC star & Team GB hero who survived a TERRORIST attack – but nothing compared to having to hide painful secret
RETIRED Team GB and Jamaica hero Michael Gunning survived the Manchester Arena bombing – and says the trauma led to him revealing his biggest secret to the world.
The 30-year-old swimmer – who competed at two World Championships – said the therapy he received after the horror attack at the Ariana Grande concert in 2017 led to him finally coming to terms with his sexuality.
Months later, Michael unexpectedly came out as gay on reality dating show The Bi Life, aged 23 – during a summer off from training.
As part of the programme, he went on his first ever date – and admits his feelings of guilt following the terror attack “really put my life into perspective”.
Londoner Michael went on to team up with Olympic gold medal-winning diver Tom Daley for his BBC documentary Illegal to be Me.
It explored how gay athletes face extreme prosecution in some of the world’s most homophobic countries.
He was speaking to The Sun this week as part of his campaign for water safety ahead of the summer.
The athlete is working with the Government, as well as Swim England and the Royal Lifesaving Society in a bid to break down barriers around learning to swim.
“Everyone deserves to have the access to learn that skill because it can save your life ultimately,” he said.
‘Massive relief’
Michael is no stranger to challenges, with our chat veering into his personal life.
“It was just a massive relief,” he said of finally coming out on the reality show. “It was a very organic thing.
“To be honest, I didn’t even really know what the show (The Bi Life) was going to be about, apart from dating different people.”
The programme, which went on to have three series, was hosted by drag Queen, Courtney Act, a friend of both Michael and Tom’s, and filmed in Barcelona.
Michael said: “Growing up as being gay, I suppressed my sexuality for so many years because I didn’t want to be further different.
“I was already different because I was one of few people of colour in swimming, I didn’t want to be further different with my sexuality.”
He added: “I guess it’s a journey for everyone and there’s no right time to come out.
“Everyone must just be them self and feel comfortable and supported in doing so.”
I guess it’s a journey for everyone and there’s no right time to come out.
Michael Gunning
He met Tom, who is also openly gay, in 2014 after joining The London Aquatics Performance Programme.
“Tom’s been a massive inspiration to many, and was a massive part of my coming out journey,” he said.
But Michael ultimately pinpoints the guilt he felt after surviving the Arena bombing – which saw 22 people killed, including children – with realising there was a “missing piece” in his life and career.
“That really put my life into perspective,” he said. “That was a catalyst to me having therapy and speaking to someone for the first time.
“I knew that the missing puzzle piece in my career was me being authentically me. So I just decided to come out and just be myself.”
Terror attack
Recalling the attack itself, Michael said it was his first concert and he was a “massive fan” of Grande.
He and his friend he estimates were little more than 200 metres from the blast.
“I think at the end we heard this massive noise and at first I thought there might have been a surprise or someone appeared out of somewhere,” he explained.
“But suddenly everyone was screaming and running past me. A very traumatic experience.
“I just remember running with everyone else. One of the reasons why I went to therapy was because I felt so guilty in not helping others that night. I’m such a giving person.
“That night I just ran with everyone else.”
He said returning back to his life afterwards was a struggle, adding: “I went back to training, but there was a mental block there.”
The Manchester Arena bombing
The Manchester Arena bombing on May 22 2017 saw 22 people killed at an Ariana Grande concert.
Carried out by extremist Salman Adedi with help from his brother Hashem Adbedi, it was the deadliest act of terrorism and the first suicide bombing in the UK since the London bombings on July 7 2005.
The perpetrator detonated a homemade explosive device – containing triacetone triperoxide as well as nuts and bolts – in a backpack in the venue’s foyer.
In 2020 his brother was tried and convicted for murder and attempted murder and conspiracy.
He was sentenced to life in prison in August that year, with a minimum term of 55 years, the longest ever imposed by a British court.
A public inquiry in 2021 found that “more should have been done” by cops to prevent the attack.
MI5 also admitted it acted “too slowly” in dealing with Salman Adedi.
Shortly after the bombing, Michael decided to switch from Team GB to representing Jamaica in an effort to inspire more people from the Caribbean.
He would compete in the 200m butterfly and 200m freestyle at the World Aquatics Championships in 2017 and 2019, as well as the 2019 Pan American Games.
He finally hung up his goggles two years ago as arguably the fastest male swimmer in Jamaican history and the only member of the national team who was openly gay.
“Most athletes don’t want to go into the spotlight again,” he said. “I think for me I have got that bubbly personality, I have got something to share.
“When I decided to retire I knew I wouldn’t be stepping away from swimming completely.”
Michael aspires to be a TV presenter, and produced a documentary last year on Sky Sports called Beneath the Surface in which he “was able to shine a light on different athletes’ journeys”.
‘I saw people crying and it really moved me’
Another goal is to increase awareness of water safety, as well as the uptake of swimming lessons, particularly for people of colour.
The latest research by Swim England indicates that a significant number of children are being taken out of swimming lessons before they achieve competency.
Specifically, over 70% of kids are withdrawn before they master crucial skills like treading water or floating, according to the body’s Love Swimming campaign.
Michael said: “I’ve been having meetings with Parliament, with Swim England and with the Royal Lifesaving Society.
“We’ve got another meeting at the end of this month. I did reach out to our local MP Liam [Conlon] from Beckenham, and obviously I want to meet him and just see what more support we can get.
“More swimming lessons, more education in schools, in the community and I think now’s the time. I’m going to keep pushing until we see that change.
“Being a swimmer I’m probably biased when I say everyone should go swimming.
“Everyone deserves to have the access to learn that skill because it can save your life ultimately.”
Michael says a big part of the problem is the under funding, particularly in poorer communities, where pools are closing or families simply can’t afford the lessons.
“I used to swim at Crystal Palace and that was such a great pool but it’s a shame so many pools across the UK are closing down,” he explained.
“What worries me is it affects the underprivileged communities, the people with disadvantaged families that can’t afford to drive 40 minutes to take their child swimming when they’ve got other kids to look after.”
In 2023, he collaborated with Swim England and Speedo, and worked alongside Olympic swimmer Adam Peaty and Paralympic swimmer Ellie Simmonds to travel to different schools for talks and to provide pop up pools.
He said: “Lots of young people of colour have said my parents don’t want me to swim because it’s too dangerous, they don’t want me to drown.
“But actually, that’s the reason why you should be learning.”
Michael was hit hard by the death of 15-year-old Izaiah Smith, who drowned at a lake in Beckenham Place Park earlier this month.
Coming from the same area, he said it’s “deeply affected the community”.
“I grew up in Beckenham, I went to Beckenham Swimming Club, which is less than five minutes away and had so many incredible years there, I learnt to swim there and kind of went through the pathway,” Michael said.
“I didn’t even hear the story, I was walking around the park – I saw the flowers, had no idea what had happened. I just saw people crying and it just really moved me.”
‘We are living in very tough times’
Michael also won the Pride Award at the Attitude Pride Awards in 2019 for his efforts to raise LGBTQ+ visibility around the world.
He said: “In the LGBT community, especially with everything happening in the US, we are living in very tough times this year.
“Lots of people are seeking out help now more than ever.
“One thing I’ve been good at is not putting any pressure on. I put so much pressure on myself when I was younger to perform, to be a certain way, to fit into a certain box, I’m not going to do that anymore.”
Part of that includes looking after your mental health, and doing things when they feel right – which can be different for everyone, Michael said.
Since his first ever date on The Bi Life, he said he’s only been on one more.
“I’ve not been in a relationship,” he said. “Since retiring I’m definitely looking more at exploring that and going on more dates.
“But since that dating show, I’ve not really dated. Last year was the first time I got myself out there.
“I’m always doing things for a goal, with helping people and it’s just not been at the top of my priority. I definitely would like to find someone.
“As much as I’d love to be in a relationship, it’s okay not to be in a relationship at the age of 30, and I just want to try and change that for people.”
Tragic teen Izaiah Smith drowned
Teenager Izaiah Smith got into difficulty in the lake at Beckenham Place Park, south London, and disappeared on April 4.
Cops rushed to the scene at around 3pm, with an urgent search launched for the 15-year-old.
The London Fire Brigade, Met Police, an NHS incident response vehicle, and a police helicopter swarmed the area.
Specialist teams recovered his body at around 10.40pm later that day.
The teen was taken to hospital where he was tragically pronounced dead.
Flowers have been left in Izaiah’s memory on the railings opposite the lake.
A tribute on a GoFundMe page set up by his family said “his bright future was tragically cut short in a drowning accident, leaving an irreplaceable void in the lives of all who knew him”.
It continued: “A rising football talent, he poured his passion into sports, striving daily to grow both on and off the field.
“His legacy is one of love, perseverance, and the joy he brought to every moment and everyone.
“We have been deeply comforted by the outpouring of love and support during this unimaginable time.”
Izaiah was a pupil at Kingsdale Foundation School in West Dulwich and played football for Dorking Wanderers, as well as being part of SEDA Football Academy.