I'm giving my kids the 90s childhood I grew up in: unstructured play outside and supervised screen time

• My kids and our neighbors' kids play outside every afternoon.
• Watching them engage in unstructured play reminds me of my childhood in the 90s.
• They are not only having fun, but also growing and learning.

In a time when screens dominate children's attention, I couldn't be happier that my kids have found a different way to spend their days — playing outside with our next-door neighbors nearly every afternoon.

Watching them run around in our front yards reminds me of my own childhood in the '90s, filled with rollerskates, scraped knees, and endless imagination.

Our front yard has truly become a hub of childhood fun. Almost every day, you will see at least five kids running around outside on our street — two boys and three girls — ages 4, 5, 7, 7, and 8. Most afternoons are spent roller skating, scooting on scooters, playing hide-and-seek, throwing a ball, and just getting old, good, and dirty.

There's something magical about watching them engage in simple, unstructured play.

They are learning to resolve conflicts without adults

Recently, the kids discovered a neighborhood cat and immediately took it upon themselves to care for it. They brought the cat water, laid out a blanket, and even built a little enclosed area using a baseball net and soccer net to make the cat feel at home. They asked us to contact neighbors to see who the cat belonged to so it could go home to its rightful owner after they were done nurturing the kitty. Their kindness and teamwork in this small act demonstrated the values they are learning through play — empathy, problem-solving, and cooperation.

One of the most inspiring aspects of their playtime is how they resolve conflicts over what to do. With five unique personalities, disagreements naturally arise. One child may want to host a frontyard fashion show, while another prefers a game of catch. These differences sometimes lead to arguments among the children; however, these disagreements help them learn to take turns, make compromises, and give everyone an opportunity to enjoy their preferred activity.

Their ability to negotiate and collaborate without adult intervention (most of the time) is a testament to the social skills they are developing through these outdoor adventures.

They get limited and monitored screen time

On spring 2024, my husband, my two next-door neighbors, and I began having organic conversations about parenting and technology on our front lawns. Already noticing screen time's negative effects on our children, we all decided to read Jonathan Haidt's "The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness."

The book, which explores how technology has contributed to a mental health crisis among children raised on digital devices, has many great takeaways. One of the book's core messages that truly resonated with all of us is that the decline of free play and the increase in screen time have severely harmed children's social and emotional development.

As millennials, we remember being children who could play outside with neighbors with little to no adult supervision, making up games, playing tag, and generally working on our social skills with our peers. The book suggests that kids need more unsupervised play to develop independence, problem-solving skills, and social competence.

We want our kids to have the childhood we had

We all agreed that we want our children to grow up experiencing life outside, playing with neighbors the way we did — running, exploring, making mistakes, and learning to navigate conflicts together. It's about giving them the space to figure things out with one another rather than being absorbed by screens. Don't get me wrong, our children still get screen time, but it's limited and monitored.

Other neighbors often stroll by, smiling as they reminisce about a time when front-yard play was the norm. Every now and then, other neighborhood kids join in, turning our little patch of grass into a lively, impromptu playdate filled with laughter, negotiation, and the kind of childhood moments we all cherish.

In a world where children are often glued to tablets and video games, and the art of face-to-face interaction is fading, I feel incredibly fortunate that our little group of front-yard friends is embracing the kind of carefree, outdoor play that defined so many of our '90s childhoods.

Watching them play outside almost every day is a reminder that the best childhood moments are often the simplest ones.