I live in the UK and my parents are in Australia. It's hard to care for them as they age, but I'm not uprooting my family.

• Eighteen years ago I moved from Australia to the UK and built a life for myself there.
• My parents are still in Australia and caring for them as they age from afar has been difficult.
• I love my life in the UK and don't plan to uproot my family.

I grew up in a small sugarcane farming community in rural northern Australia. It's the kind of place where there are more cane toads and crocodiles than people. My teenage years were spent fantasizing about escaping the quiet humdrum town where nothing happened, for an exciting life in a big city where you could go out every night of the week. World travel was also high on my agenda.

True to my word, I was out the door and on the first flight to the UK once my savings allowed. London was an ideal base with its cheap flights to Europe allowing for frequent trips to my dream destinations of Italy, Spain and France, and an easy to secure working holiday visa for young Australians, which also meant a strong Australian expat community in the city.

I had no idea that the handsome English stranger I met in a bar in central London would be my future husband. It's the reason that, 18 years later, I am now a permanent resident of the UK, raising two young boys who speak with British accents and have no idea what Vegemite is. I have so much to be grateful for in this life I've built on the other side of the world, but the price I am paying for that is becoming more painful as the years roll on: not being there for my parents as they get older.

The distance helped me fulfill my dreams

In the last two decades, I've ticked off many of my life goals, mainly thanks to my big move. With my husband, I've traveled to more than 60 countries, even quitting our jobs for six months to visit far-away places like Uzbekistan, Kyrgyzstan, Bhutan, Oman and Georgia. Together, we've trekked the Himalayas, surfed in the Philippines, and motorbiked through Vietnam. We own our own house, and I've built a rewarding media career, cutting my teeth on business magazines as a young journalist in London.

Things are getting complicated

While I wouldn't change any of it, this life I've built on the other side of the world has started to feel bittersweet. My mom and dad are now 71 and 80 respectively, and while we make the long, expensive journey to Australia to see them each year, it's becoming more apparent with each trip how fragile their health is. With my father in particular, I've become painfully aware that we may only have a few years left to spend time with him.

I knew when I married my husband that this would be something I eventually would have to deal with if I chose to settle in the UK with him, but I put it to the back of my mind, and focused on how happy we were to be building a life together. We still are, but as my parents' vulnerability increases, so too does my guilt for not being there to support them.

For example, both my parents have regular doctor appointments, and need to travel to the nearest city which is a 90-minute drive away. This used to be no issue for my dad, who until recently, was a very dependable long-distance driver. But his mobility has been severely impacted in recent months, and he can no longer drive that far. My mom has not driven long distances for some time, so now they both rely on favors from friends to drive them to and from their appointments. It's not a small ask, as it's a whole day commitment for that person.

Medical issues aren't the only thing I worry about

Their town also recently experienced severe flooding, which saw my parents' whole backyard and downstairs area inundated with water. Going through the damaged items and cleaning up after the water receded was hard for them, both physically and mentally, and again, they had to rely on the kindness of others, this time neighbors. I did what I could from nearly 10,000 miles away. I completed their online government financial assistance applications for them, and I managed to find a volunteer delivery service to drop them off fresh, hot meals. All of this was helpful, but I still wasn't there to physically help them, and that made me feel like I'd abandoned them when they really needed me.

I don't know what the future will bring, but I do know I'll be in the UK

My husband, boys, and I are going to stay with them for three weeks this summer, but I will have to regroup with my sister to work out what support they now need, and how we will facilitate that, as while she lives in the same state as them, though she's still a half day of travel away. Organizing outsourced services is the only way I can realistically help, as I can't cut myself into two.

So while I realize that the years are passing quickly and that time with my parents is precious, I won't be moving back home. Our boys are settled into school and daycare here in the UK, and I also have my husband to think about, as he recently lost his dad and needs to support his mom.

If I had known 18 years ago how this would feel, would I have canceled that first date with my husband? Not a chance. The life we have together is precious too, and that is something to feel proud of, not guilty.