Inside world of child incels seen in Adolescence sparking ‘war on women’ pandemic – with secret codes & rape obsession
WHEN crossbow killer Kyle Clifford brutally murdered his young ex-girlfriend Louise Hunt, her mum and sister last year, it was a horrific, senseless attack that left many asking ‘why?’
What could drive a young man to carry out such an angry, extreme act of violence against three innocent women? A break-up wasn’t enough surely, so what possible explanation could there be?
Digging deeper, police and prosecutors discovered monster Clifford had accessed violent misogynistic content online less than 24 hours before, including up to 10 videos of controversial influencer Andrew Tate.
While it would be far more palatable to explain the cold-blooded killing away as a one-off or rarity, access to dangerous content is creating an increasing problem.
In 2021 incel-obsessed gunman Jake Davison killed five in Plymouth, and Gabrielle Friel, an ‘incel follower’ obsessed with mass murder received a 10-year sentence after amassing weapons in preparation for a terrorist attack.
Just last week the charity Everyone’s Invited released a list of over 1,600 UK primary schools where pupils – some aged just five – submitted anonymous accounts of sexual harassment and abuse, including rape.
The complex issue has also been thrust firmly into the spotlight recently in the highly-acclaimed Netflix four-parter, Adolescence.
The show highlights the negative influence social media can have on some teenagers, with 13-year-old Jamie Miller, played by Owen Cooper, stabbing his classmate Katie to death after seemingly being radicalised by extremist online content.
And it’s an issue experts fear is becoming widespread, with misogynists using social media, message boards, emojis and memes to influence young men online.
Speaking exclusively to The Sun, sociologist and Cardiff Metropolitan University lecturer Dr Ashley Morgan says: “This TV programme shows us it could happen in any town in the country, that a 13-year-old child could stab somebody else to death.
“…There probably isn’t a town in Britain where a child has not stabbed somebody. There’s no obvious deterrent. How do we address that?
“There’s [now] this idea of very extreme reaction to things that in the past perhaps there would have just been a scuffle, or fight.
“Young men have got access to considerably more graphic violence and porn than they ever have before.
“I think there’s a lot of de-sensitisation… There is also a considerable dislocation between reality and fantasy. People care far less about reality [and are increasingly] living online.”
A disturbing reality
The world of toxic masculinity, incels and the ‘manosphere’ is a complex one.
Put simply, toxic masculinity is a negative set of beliefs and behaviours expected of men, including suppressing emotions, other than ‘acceptable’ ones, such as anger or rage.
The manosphere meanwhile is an umbrella term used to describe a group of misogynist online communities increasingly prevalent on social media platforms such as TikTok.
This includes incels, meaning involuntarily celibate, who are upset about, and blame women, for their lack of sexual activity and success with the opposite sex.
As University of Kent social psychologist and gender and sexism expert Dr Hannah Zibell explains: “They share a male supremacist view of the world – men are seen as naturally dominant and superior to women.
“It is also common for members of the manosphere to think of themselves as victims of an oppressive feminist system that has taken away the rightful place of men in the world.”
In Adolescence, this is shown through Jamie swaying between open self-pity, anger and hatred of women, and was seen in the real-life case of Kyle Clifford, with the judge describing him as a man “soaked in self-pity” who held women “in utter contempt”.
Dr Zibell adds: “Adolescence is a realistic, nuanced portrayal of a common reality, where young boys are radicalised by the world they grow up in and online spaces, depicting the complexities of what can lead to violence against women and girls.”
‘Secret’ emoji language
Another element of Netflix’s most recent offering grabbing attention is the use of seemingly innocent emojis as an undetected ‘code’ used online.
Detective Luke Bascome, played by Top Boy’s Ashley Walters, is seen being educated by his teen son on what certain emojis really mean.
On the show for example, the seemingly innocuous kidney bean emoji is used to imply Jamie is an incel.
In real life the red pill – and the dynamite emoji – is also often used by incel communities.
This stems back to the film The Matrix, to convey that you’re someone who can see the world is not what it seems – in this context, meaning women are an issue, and feminism’s gone too far.
The ‘100’ emoji is also used when referencing the incel idea that 80 per cent of women are attracted to 20 per cent of men.
However the emojis used are constantly changing and evolving, to avoid detection from tech companies, and experts advise parents should be warned not to take everything at face value.
Dr Zibell comments: “It helps if parents are aware of what emojis mean to their children so they can better understand what their children are communicating and be on the lookout for problematic content or interactions.”
Nine-year-olds watching porn
The first incel forum, called Alana’s Involuntary Celibacy Project, was actually founded by a woman in 1997 in Canada, as a place for anyone who struggled with involuntary celibacy – but the space has since evolved.
Dr Zibell says: “Over time, these spaces changed into communities for mostly men who espouse extremely misogynistic ideas about women and society.”
And there’s certainly increasing cause for alarm. A 2022 study by the Centre for Countering Digital Hate (CCDH) for example warned on one major incel site there was a post about rape published every 29 minutes.
Additionally, according to a Sky News study, 55 per cent of Year 10 students it surveyed, aged between 14 and 15, had seen sexually explicit or violent content that was inappropriate for their age.
The impact is being felt within our schools, with the majority of teachers surveyed by Everyone’s Invited confirming pupils under nine were watching pornography and using misogynistic, violent and sexist language at school.
I see the boys’ faces when they’re constantly told how men are violent, and I’m scared we are pushing some of them further towards people like Tate
Secondary school teacher
Dr Zibell adds: “More and more young men and boys think that feminism has gone too far or done more harm than good to society.”
Speaking to The Sun, one inner city secondary school teacher agreed.
He says: “When we talk about feminism and patriarchy, we’re seeing push back on that from boys recently.
“It’s not every boy, but the real fear is not knowing what they’re watching at home – you don’t really know what they’re thinking.
“I think there’s always been an expectation among young boys to be and act a certain way, but social media now amplifies it.”
He also revealed he sees more and more pupils turning to the likes of controversial Andrew Tate as a role model – an influencer who in 2023 was charged in Romania with rape, human trafficking and organising a crime group to sexually exploit women.
According to a YouGov survey that same year, one in six boys aged six to 15 had a positive opinion of Tate.
The teacher adds: “I see the boys’ faces when they’re constantly told how men are violent, and I’m scared we are pushing some of them further towards people like Tate.
“I don’t think parents are switched on at all, it’s pretty depressing.”
It’s a concern echoed by singer Sam Fender, who recently argued young, working class men who are “made to feel like they’re a problem” were being driven towards Andrew Tate videos.
Speaking to The Times, he said: “They’re being shamed all the time and made to feel like they’re a problem. People preach to some kid in a pit town in Durham who’s got f*** all and tell him he’s privileged?
“Then Tate tells him he’s worth something? It’s seductive.”
What to do if you're worried about your son
If you suspect your son may be engaging with incel content, it can be hard to know what to do. Here are some top tips shared by Safer Lives Online on their site to help you navigate such a complex topic...
- Recognise the signs: If your son is involved in this movement, he may express frustration about his inability to form romantic or sexual relationships. He might have negative views of women, often blaming them for his lack of success. He might spend a lot of time online, engaging with forums or social media platforms that support these views.
- Have an open and non-judgmental conversation: The most important thing you can do is start a conversation. Try to approach the topic with empathy, showing that you care about his well-being.
- Challenge negative beliefs: If your son begins to express views aligned with incel ideologies, gently challenge those ideas by asking him to think critically.
- Encourage healthy social connections: Sometimes, incels feel isolated because they don’t know how to make friends or talk to others. Helping him find spaces where he can connect with people who share his interests can help improve his confidence.
- Seek professional help: Speaking to a therapist, counselor, or psychologist can be a valuable step in helping him navigate his feelings.
- Report harmful content: Harmful content is anything online which causes a person distress or harm. For more info on where to report harmful content, visit UK Safer Internet Centre here.
For more info, visit Safer Lives Online here.
‘Young men are suffering’
Earlier this month former England manager Sir Gareth Southgate spoke out against “callous, manipulative and toxic influencers” in a speech, hopefully raising awareness for more positive male role models for young people.
He said: “They willingly trick young men into believing that success is measured by money or dominance, that strength means never showing emotion, and that the world, including women, is against them.
“Young men are suffering. They are feeling isolated. They’re grappling with their masculinity and with their broader place in society.”
Young boys are often insecure about their own masculinity and lack positive role models… The manosphere can exploit these insecurities, amplify them and also provide a scapegoat
Dr Hannah Zibell
But what makes young boys in particular vulnerable to this sort of content?
Dr Zibell says: “During adolescence, children are often very insecure and may struggle with their self-confidence, self-loathing, and also mental health issues.
“Young boys are often insecure about their own masculinity and lack positive role models of what it means to be a man. The manosphere can exploit these insecurities.
“Believing that men are superior to women can give young boys confidence and a sense of power.
“Feminism is seen as the villain that ruined society; girls and women who do not behave the way they should become the problem, all of which can fuel anger towards them and feminists.”
A ‘war on women’
A recent psychological study revealed some young boys display feelings of aggression when they believe their masculinity is being challenged, and boys as young as ten already feel a sense of ‘manhood’ they need to protect.
Of course, thankfully most young boys will not go on to kill or commit crime, but there is still the fear harmful content is fuelling violence towards women.
In Isla Vista, California, in 2014, incel Elliot Rodger murdered six people and injured 14 before killing himself, leaving a 137-page manifesto outlining his desire “to punish everyone who is sexually active”, and to bring about a “war on women”.
Before taking his own life, the killer had posted a video saying he had “never even kissed a girl” and claimed his actions were “a day of retribution”.
In 2021, gunman Jake Davison, 22, killed five people including his mother and a three-year-old girl in Plymouth, Devon, before turning the gun on himself.
According to an inquest, he was said to have been fascinated by mass shootings, serial killers and incel ideology, and bereaved families urged the government to take action against incel culture.
Dr Zibell adds: “The manosphere normalises gender-based violence and in some instances even celebrates it… [Dehumanising] women and reducing them to sexual objects who are naturally inferior to men.
“All of this can lead to violence against women being seen as justified and normal, and potentially lower the threshold to committing violence against women and girls.”
Open communication
But in the digital age, what can parents do?
In heartbreaking scenes shown in Adolescence Jamie’s parents are seen bereft, wondering what more they could have done to prevent their son becoming a murderer, and if it was their fault he’d grown up that way after spending hours locked away in his room online.
Dr Zibell adds: “It helps if people are aware of the kind of content their children are seeing online and openly communicate with their children about this.
“Limiting social media access is often counterproductive, since children can also be shown this type of content by their peers.
“It is also important for parents to think about which gender roles they themselves are modelling to their children.”