3 Movies That Would Have Been Better If Jennifer Coolidge Was In Them
You know that thrill you get when your favorite actor strolls across the screen? You had no idea they were in the movie and suddenly there they are, wanting to eat a hot dog real bad.
That’s the affect Hollywood royalty Jennifer Coolidge has on her rabid fans. You throw this babe in your movie or show and it’s suddenly got the star power that’ll get people watching. (Am I laying it on a little thick? Sure, but we’re talking about our hopes and dreams right now. There’s never such a thing as “too much.”)
While Jennifer Coolidge has made plenty of movies better for having been in them, there are still more than suffered without her on the cast list. Life would have been better if she was in these three movies:
Titanic (1997)
Jennifer Coolidge would play the perfect character to distract Cal from his bloodthirsty revenge for Jack stealing Rose away from him. She’d use her feminine wiles–probably at the fancy first class dinner table–to seduce him. Of course she’d also be seducing the captain as well, since he’s more her speed. Would she gone down with the ship for him, though? Hell no. Jennifer gets a cozy spot on the first lifeboat.
Jurassic Park (1993)
We all know how flirtatious Jeff Goldblum was in Jurassic Park, spouting wisdom with his shirt unbuttoned. Now imagine Jennifer Coolidge there, too. She’d be a good match for him. Maybe she could play one of the scientists on the project who makes him question everything–all while having a flirt-off.
The Matrix (1999)
Imagine Jennifer Coolidge on Neo’s crew. She’d totally rock a leather trench coat and sunglasses. Plus, that crew of ultra-serious cyber nerds could use a little levity. Cypher probably never would have betrayed them for a VR steak if it meant he could spend eternity with Jennifer Coolidge. I know I wouldn’t.