Are you a natural Traitor? The 7 qualities that make a good liar and how to spot the subtle signs you’re being played
ARE you confident, have great attention to detail and can stay calm when put on the spot?
If so, you’d make a great Traitor.
That’s according to two psychologists and behavioural experts who reckon the secret to winning the hit BBC show is subtlety and control.
“Good liars project self-assurance and remain calm under pressure,” Dr Lalitaa Suglani, a psychologist, therapist and relationship coach, tells Sun Health.
“They are also highly adaptable and rarely get flustered.”
Darren Stanton, a psychological coach, body language expert and self-professed ‘human lie detector’, adds: “The most successful liars are people with an excellent memory, but who keep it simple and as close to the truth as possible.
“They are confident, but not too vocal, and they try not to stand out too much.”
With The Traitors final looming, and Claudia Winkleman gearing up to crown the series three winner, we take a deeper look at the art of deception.
WHAT MAKES A GOOD LIAR?
- Confidence
- Attention to detail
- Good memory
- Control
- Adaptable
- Personable
- Calm under pressure
Darren and Dr Suglani agree that the number one trait for a successful liar is confidence.
But attention to detail is also a must.
“Good liars create consistent, believable stories that hold up under scrutiny,” Dr Suglani says.
“They also need to have an excellent memory to know what they’ve said and to whom,” Darren adds.
Being able to suppress nervous tics, voice changes and “micro-expressions” that could give the game away is also key.
“You need strong control, and to be able to look at how you need to behave based on who you are in front of,” Dr Suglani says.
“A good liar can then quickly adjust their story if challenged without appearing flustered.”
Darren adds: “The brain will always produce the evidence to support the belief.
“So if someone truly believes a certain reality is true, or they have mentally rehearsed something that is untrue into becoming ‘the truth’, then the brain won’t give off the leakage signals it normally would.
“The brain will think it must be the truth, and will produce signs you’re telling the truth, even if you’re not.
“That’s why people find it easy to lie and can be very convincing.”
And ultimately, good liars must be personable. If you want someone to believe you, you’ve got to get them to like you!
“You must build trust and rapport with someone if you want to manipulate them,” Darren says.
HOW TO SPOT ONE
The average person will tell three white lies in a normal 10-minute conversation, with men eight times more likely to lie than women, according to Darren.
“Men’s lies are often about power, status, and money, while women tend to lie more to protect the feelings of others, such as friends and family,” he adds.
But how do you spot who is telling the truth and who isn’t?
To win The Traitors, you need to play the long game. Balance subtle deception with strategic truth-telling to maintain credibility
Dr Lalitaa Suglani
“Liars will use grandiose language and overcompensate by giving too much detail,” Darren says.
“Disproportionate language – saying things like, ‘I swear on my house’ or ‘I swear on my mum’s life’ – are always red flags.”
Dr Suglani adds: “Liars often use excessive justification or repetition, over-explaining or repeating phrases to convince you of their story.”
Overemphasising honesty with statements like, ‘To be honest’, may also signal an attempt to compensate for dishonesty, as can pausing or stumbling over words.
“Liars may hesitate, stammer, or speak unnaturally as they fabricate details on the spot,” Dr Suglani says.
“Lying can also cause subtle changes in tone, pace or volume, so look out for clues in their voice pitch or speech patterns.”
That might have been why Traitor Armani got caught out early on in series three.
She stumbled over her words and became flustered and panicked when contestants, including her own sister Maia, came for her at the round table.
But it’s not just in what liars say, it’s about their behaviour too.
Avoiding eye contact or maintaining unnatural, prolonged eye contact are key signs of deception, according to the psychologist.
The 5 telltale signs your partner is cheating
By Lynn Kernan, Scottish Sun Features Editor
CATCHING your partner cheating is most people’s worst nightmare.
In a committed relationship, finding out one party has been seeing someone else in secret usually spells the end.
Experts say if you suspect your other half might be playing away, there are some telltale signs to watch out for.
And many of these are in the bedroom.
Amy Williams, CEO of Peachy, a leading adult toy store, says: “Changes in how a couple has sex can be early indicators that a partner is thinking about being unfaithful.”
The sexpert has shared her five top signs that could spell trouble..
- You’re having less sex than usual.
- Or your partner suddenly wants to have sex a lot more.
- They are focused on physical gratification rather than building an emotional connection
- They suddenly want to try out new moves in the bedroom.
- Something smells off – people smell different when they’ve been intimate with others (and it’s not just about perfume or aftershave).
“Also look out for body language mismatches,” Dr Suglani says.
“Someone’s nonverbal cues may not align with their spoken words (e.g. nodding while saying ‘no’), revealing internal conflict.”
Darren adds: “Three to five seconds of eye contact is standard, but people trying to sell a lie will overcompensate that.
“A person’s blink rate will also double and their pupils will dilate.
“It’s to do with the body’s fight or flight response because there is an emotional shift when we lie.”
Microexpressions – brief flashes of true emotions (like fear or guilt) – may appear on a liar’s face before they regain composure, Dr Suglani says.
And people often touch their nose, cover their mouth, or exhibit other nervous behaviours when lying.
THE SECRET TO WINNING THE TRAITORS
Knowing all of this makes it easy to see how Harry Clark won series two of The Traitors.
He manipulated his way to victory by using his charm and trustworthy nature to convince his competitors – particularly best pal Mollie Pearce – that he was a Faithful and walk away with the entire £95,000 prize.
His number one piece of advice for winning the show was to stay true to ‘normal’ self.
Harry said at the time: “Everyone always over-complicates it and that’s where they go wrong at the first hurdle.
“Once you’re chosen to be a Traitor, everyone goes, ‘How do I act like a Traitor?’ But you don’t act any differently, the best way to act is to be normal.
“People get in their heads, thinking, ‘I need to lie, I need to be a deceitful person’, but you don’t, you just need to be yourself and keep a little white lie until the end of the game.
“My best advice would be to go in there with true intentions to play the game and only see yourself as a Traitor once you’ve got the cloak on.
“As soon as you take that cloak off you’re just exactly the same as everyone else.
“It was so easy for me during the days because I was a Faithful.”
Darren, speaking in partnership with Slingo, agrees, adding: “The way to win The Traitors is to curb your ego and make things subtle.
“Don’t be too vocal or obvious, don’t stand out too much or put your head above the parapet. Less is more.
“The great manipulators in that show always convince people they aren’t like that.
“It’s also all about building trust and rapport. That is the key ingredient.
“You need to match and mirror the other person, and let them think they’ve come to their own conclusion when you’ve actually manipulated them into that.”
Dr Suglani, working with Fruityslots, says: “Build trust as early as you can, and be likeable. Form alliances and establish yourself as reliable to avoid suspicion.
“Also play the long game. Balance subtle deception with strategic truth-telling to maintain credibility.
“Reading the room and other people’s energies is also important, so pay attention to group dynamics and adapt your approach.
“And of course, control your emotions. Stay calm and collected, especially when accusations arise.
“Finally, subtly sow seeds of doubt among others to keep the spotlight off yourself, and know when to bluff.”