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Mary, Joseph and Muriel the mule battle Cushing’s and foot abscesses in pantomime with a difference

A female Joseph, a male Mary and a veterinary star travelled to Bethlehem with a mule just before Christmas – having to deal with a couple of foot abscesses and PPID (Cushing’s)-related issues en route.

Reuben and Sarah Whittaker, who run RW Equine Vet covering East Sussex and Kent, thought their idea to run their December client evening as a pantomime at Queens Hall Theatre, Cranbrook, was a splendid one – until shortly before the performance.

“I’d never been on stage before and was suddenly terrified!” Sarah told H&H. “We hadn’t really had time for a proper practice, so we rented a village hall a couple of days before, and not everyone could make it – but on the night, everyone really enjoyed it, and the clients did too.”

Reuben and Sarah, who set up the practice in 2018, told H&H they have always aimed to make their client evenings as interesting as possible, such as one in which they dissected equine guts, spreading the whole area out on a table to help understanding of colic.

“We always do a Christmas one; we used to rent a hotel’s wedding room and greet everyone with prosecco and canapes, and once we went to the Sternbergs’,” Sarah said. “Then Reuben and I came across the Cranbrook theatre, got chatting to the guy who runs it and found out they would hire it out.”

Initially, the plan was to have PowerPoint presentations on the theatre’s big screen – but then the plan changed.

“One night, we’d had a couple of glasses of wine, and we started thinking we could make it really interesting, and make it into a panto,” Sarah said.

Initially, Reuben was to play Joseph and Sarah Mary, but a few weeks later, their roles were reversed, so Reuben appeared on stage complete with fake blonde plaits and a pillow under his robes, while Sarah sported a fake beard to play her husband’s husband.

Their alternative Christmas story started in a familiar way, with pregnant Mary needing to get to Bethlehem, but as the donkey was apparently poorly, they enlisted the help of Muriel the pantomime mule, aka vet nurse Katie and practice manager Clare, and office administrator Jane as the star who lit the way.

“Muriel was a bit older; as it was based on caring for older horses, so she was drinking a lot of water as she had Cushing’s, then she was limping across the stage with a foot abscess!” Sarah said, explaining that as each ailment was found, a screen came down with information, and a vet appeared in a cameo role to explain how to treat it.

“Then the screen went up and we went back to being silly,” Reuben said.

The Whittakers’ 10-year-old twin sons also joined the cast as elves

There was more unplanned mayhem when Sarah’s sister got herself locked out of the Whittakers’ house in the village, while the sausage rolls were still in the oven, so Reuben had to make a dash for it between scenes, through the streets still dressed as pregnant Mary.

“We did worry that people might think it was a bit weird but nearly 200 came and everyone said it was such a laugh, they all seemed really to enjoy it,” Sarah said.

One vet was still on call, as the practice prides itself as one of the remaining independent vets that provide their own out-of-hours cover, but the staff are all keen to repeat the event next year.

“They want to do it bigger and better next Christmas,” said Reuben.

Sarah joked that she needs 10 months to recover first, but Reuben added: “I’ve already started writing it!”