My cuckold thrill has got me into a financial mess
DEAR DEIDRE: BEING cuckolded is my ultimate thrill, but it’s got me in a financial mess.
I’ve now found myself responsible for bringing up two children who aren’t mine – both conceived when my wife slept with other men, with my agreement.
I’m 42 and my wife is 38. We’ve been together for seven years.
Since I first became sexually active, I’ve always enjoyed being cuckolded.
In fact, knowing the woman I’m with is sleeping with other men – or even better, watching her do it – turns me on far more than regular sex.
Sometimes it’s the only way I can get aroused.
But most women I’ve been with have either refused, or tried it and found it distasteful.
Eventually, I went on a cuckholding site, where I met the woman who is now my wife.
She embraced my fetish with great enthusiasm, happily taking several lovers and frequently inviting me to watch them.
But she wasn’t always careful – again, partly my fault, as I preferred her to have unprotected sex – and twice got pregnant.
She now has a four-year-old girl, and a two-year-old boy.
Of course, I agreed to support the children, even though they are not mine.
But now times are tight and I’m struggling to afford our living costs. I’m starting to resent paying for children I didn’t father or want.
My wife says I agreed so I can’t complain – and she’s right.
Now, it seems that everyone is happy, except me.
Yet I can’t leave. I’m the only real dad the children have known.
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DEIDRE SAYS: You’ve been happily indulging your cuckolding fetish for many years, but are now reaping the consequences of your unconventional lifestyle.
While you did agree to your wife having unprotected sex with other men, you’re not the children’s father and therefore on paper are not responsible for them.
But these children have had no say in this arrangement and have grown up believing you are their dad.
They love you, and so while you may not be their biological father, the bond you have made and can strengthen in the future could be as valuable as any father/ child relationship.
Of course you or your wife could contact these men and ask them to fulfil their legal responsibilities to provide for their children, but would you really want them involved in your family life?
You can talk through your concerns with Family Lives (familylives.org.uk).
Sex and relationship counselling could help.Contact Tavistock Relationships (tavistockrelationships.org) to arrange an appointment.
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