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Give Jerry Jones an Emmy for Landman

Photo: Emerson Miller/Paramount+

I’m going to be frank right up top: Landman is none of my business. The Television Academy seems to have an allergy to Taylor Sheridan, and so I’ve been able to limit my exposure to his prolific output to my colleague Kathryn’s coverag of it. But now I’m seeing clips of his newest show all over social media and hearing them infest the sports podcasts I listen to while I worry about the Bills’ chances in the NFL playoffs. Everyone’s talking about this scene of Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones completely knocking a Landman cameo out of the park. And so, for the good of us all, I’ve decided to put together this FAQ.

Why am I hearing that Jerry Jones was great on Landman?
Because Jerry Jones was legitimately great on Landman.

Jerry Jones, the owner of the Dallas Cowboys?
Yep!

Jerry Jones, who is 1,000 years old and built his giant football stadium with an oversize scoreboard that hangs too low and aligned said stadium incorrectly so the afternoon sun blinds the players as they play and also refuses to hang blackout curtains that might mitigate this issue?
He’s 82 years old, but yes.

And he was on Landman, the new Taylor Sheridan show with Billy Bob Thornton about (one assumes) Texas and oil and business being conducted while wearing a ten-gallon hat? 
Jerry appeared on the January 5 episode, titled “WolfCamp.”

Surely this was a three-second cameo in which Jerry plays himself and shakes Billy Bob Thornton’s hand in a crowded party full of Texas bigwigs and says, like, “Hey, Billy Bob Thornton’s character, you did a real good job on that Landman business deal,” in order to communicate that BBT’s character hangs with the high rollers in his industry?
Some of this is right, but not the parts you think.

What then?
Jerry played himself, essentially: Jerry Jones, the owner of the Dallas Cowboys and also an oil-and-gas man. And he showed up at the hospital bedside of Jon Hamm’s character — who had apparently Landmanned too hard and ended up in the hospital — and proceeded to deliver a monologue that by all rights should get him a Guest Actor Emmy nomination come this summer.

Go away. 
I will, but first you have to watch the clip.

Go AWAY!

I refuse to watch this.
I don’t want this to be true any more than you do. The NFL’s most despised owner, who has been making crazy decisions about the Cowboys for so long that you can’t remember a time when America’s Team wasn’t a cause for laughter and derision, turns out to be the one sports figure who can lay down an effective dramatic performance on TV.

And you saw this how, if you don’t even watch Landman?
If you must know, I was listening to the Bill Simmons podcast —

Oh, for God’s sake.
— because I wanted to hear what people were saying about the Bills-Broncos game!

And they went off topic …
I’m as surprised as you are. Yes, in the middle of “Guess the Lines,” either Bill or Cousin Sal mentioned how Jerry Jones was great in his Landman cameo, which felt like a bag of letter tiles had just got dumped onto a table, like in that Sneakers scene I love.

Okay, Bill, rein it in.
That’s all it was! Then I started seeing the clip all over Twitter and Instagram. There he was, eyes glassy with tears, voice cracking, delivering a monologue to Hamm’s character about how, a long time ago, he made the decision that he wanted to work with his kids and doing so has made all the difference.

Wait, how has that made all the difference?
Look. In the Taylor Sheridan universe, deciding to become an oil-and-gas baron and then purchasing America’s most storied sports franchise so you can run it as a vanity project is actually a heartwarming endeavor if you do it with your kids and not in a battle against your kids. Don’t think about the specifics, man — just watch this old guy act! The way his composure nearly gives out at the words “not just Thanksgiving and Christmas.” The way he manages to wring pathos out of “I’m pretty proud of the stuff we’ve done with oil and gas.”

You’re sick.
Maybe! But I’m watching the (alleged) sundowning (allegedly!) old man hold court opposite Oscar winner Billy Bob Thornton and Emmy winner Jon Hamm, playing a Texas oil version of Marley’s ghost for these two (I’m assuming) ruthless business moguls. And for five ungodly seconds, I’m thinking, I’m so glad that guy got to run his oil-and-gas and football businesses with his kids. And that shit is evil, but it’s also the work of a guy who can, inexplicably, act.

Ria.city






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