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News Every Day |

The new place to complain about your boss: LinkedIn

Stefanie Costi knew the pressure was mounting for her boss.

As a family-law attorney in Australia, Costi was used to tense situations. Trials were always stressful at the firm, but leading up to a major case's court date, last-minute tasks added to the strain. One day her boss was standing in his office trying to organize some files when he had an outburst. "Here, you fix it!" he shouted, she recalls. He threw the case file at her head, she jumped away, and it hit a bookshelf, bursting open and scattering papers and folders across the floor, she says. Costi stared at her manager in disbelief.

Costi recalls that behavior like this was all too common at the firm. Managing partners like her boss routinely belittled employees. One even put up a sign in the hallway that said "No whining about the long hours. If you can't cope, we'll replace you in a heartbeat." Costi says multiple colleagues described having panic attacks.

She reported her boss' behavior to HR but found those managers dismissive and ineffective. Eventually she decided she'd had enough and left the firm. Then some time after she landed at another firm, she decided to share her experiences on the platform where she may find a future employer: LinkedIn.

"Once upon a time, there was a bright young lawyer. She was bullied at work. It ruined her confidence," her post began, before revealing, "That lawyer was me." Costi's vulnerability stood out amid the job listings, team camaraderie, and humblebragging. It garnered more than 1.2 million views and nearly 10,000 likes. Many of the more than 1,500 people who commented on the post (and the thousand who messaged Costi directly) shared their own stories of toxic bosses and workplaces.

Costi was overwhelmed by the response. "It hit me hard how many others are suffering in silence," she says. She began posting more stories about toxicity at her former firm and shared advice on how to handle workplace bullying and harassment. She changed her LinkedIn title to The Anti-Bullying Lawyer.

Today the 34-year-old has more than 80,000 followers. A few times a week she publishes a post — often several hundred words — and a selfie in which she's holding up a whiteboard with a handwritten summary of that post, like "A toxic boss will use a performance improvement plan to control you, not to help you." A toxic boss, she writes in one post, will "shower you with praise when you meet their expectations but withhold recognition" and "exploit your fear of failure to push you beyond reasonable limits." Each post typically gets thousands of comments (most empathetic, some disparaging) from workers around the world.

Costi is far from alone. Amid a fracturing social-media landscape and the decline of company loyalty and other evolving tensions between employees and employers in the wake of the pandemic, LinkedIn has grown looser and weirder, more personal and more combative. To some, the professional networking platform has become a dating site; to others, a comedy club. Now a new type of LinkedIn influencer has also emerged, one who instead of touting how to maximize your productivity and get the best out of your workplace shines a light on the darkest corners of work.

This growing cadre of influencers and their followers share advice on identifying, navigating, and escaping toxic workplaces. Posts from professionals telling stories about their "awful," "horrible," and "terrible" bosses abound. They tend to see human resources as an extension of corporate dogma meant to reinforce company policies. "There's nothing human or resourceful about HR in a toxic workplace," Costi writes in one post. "Why HR Isn't Your Friend in Uncovering Toxic Work Cultures," begins a post from a Canadian career coach with nearly 200,000 followers. Instead, they see a better path to healthier workplaces in forming a community of empathizers on LinkedIn, where workers can share their stories and commiserate.

The HR professionals I talked to, meanwhile, were alarmed by the uptick they'd seen in posts about bad bosses and noxious office behavior. They caution that if workers bypass HR and take complaints to LinkedIn, they risk doing more harm than good.


Workplace toxicity — a broad term encompassing infighting, intimidation, belittling, and other affronts — harms the productivity and mental health of employees across the workforce. In a 2023 survey from the American Psychological Association, 22% of workers said they had experienced mental harm at work, and the same percentage of workers said they had experienced harassment. The APA said that in the 2024 version of the survey, 59% of respondents indicated their employer "thinks their work environment is a lot mentally healthier than it actually is." A 2024 report by the human-resources software provider HR Brain said that 37% of workers suggested they experienced a toxic workplace daily and that 32% identified their boss as a primary source of stress and anxiety.

"Toxic behavior in the workplace is an ever present issue with the power to significantly undermine company culture, team morale, and performance," says Joe Galvin, the chief research officer of the executive coaching firm Vistage. "The rise of remote and hybrid work has blurred traditional boundaries, making it easier for toxic behaviors to slip by unnoticed." Email and messaging is more common with remote workers who otherwise might just talk out a problem in person at the office, Galvin says.

Toxic behavior in the workplace comes in all shapes and sizes. Costi connected me to several colleagues, clients, and followers who had experienced a toxic workplace.

Beverly (who asked me to use a pseudonym for fear of retribution) was an up-and-coming lawyer at another firm in Australia. One day she approached a senior partner for advice on what it takes to excel and be promoted at the firm. "She invited me into her office and asked me to close the door," Beverly recounts over email. "She tried to convince me that I couldn't succeed in her practice area" and pressured Beverly to watch graphic footage from one of her cases, "including a prison gang rape in an effort to scare me off." Afterward, Beverly says, "she warned me that she would sue me for defamation if I told anyone about her actions and threatened to make my life difficult at the firm."

A few times a week Stefanie Costi, who goes by "The Anti-Bullying Lawyer" on LinkedIn, will make a lengthy post about navigating workplace toxicity, along with a selfie in which she holds a whiteboard sign summarizing the post.

Eventually Beverly decided to leave the firm, but she remained concerned about the senior colleague. Beverly says she thought that if she stayed at the firm the colleague "would have harassed me outside of work," adding that she has started to share her story more and will often comment on Costi's LinkedIn posts.

Helen Pamely, an attorney in Spain, also turned to LinkedIn as a place to talk about toxic work culture and help others dealing with bad behavior at work. "People don't quit companies. They quit bosses," she wrote on LinkedIn recently. She now has more than 30,000 followers and posts often about the lessons she learned in her legal career. She says the community the legal-industry LinkedIn posters are building represents a "real turning point" for the industry.

"I'm in a unique position — no longer tied to a firm — so I can speak pretty openly about cultural and systemic issues others can't," she says. "The number of messages I receive thanking me for being that voice is overwhelming. The messages come from people of all levels of seniority." She adds that "real, positive change can only happen through honest and open conversations and helping people realize they aren't alone."


Costi says people are turning to LinkedIn because they aren't seeing results from channels like human resources.

"HR is often more about protecting the company's interests than supporting employees," Costi says. "Reporting toxic behavior can backfire, labeling you as a 'troublemaker' and potentially putting your job at risk. The sad reality is that many toxic bosses are untouchable, insulated by the very system that's supposed to hold them accountable."

Publicly airing grievances can erode respect within a team. Joe Galvin

For Costi, as she often advises on LinkedIn, what works is thoroughly documenting behavior. "Keep meticulous records of every incident, every conversation, every email," she says. "This isn't just about protecting yourself. It's about building an undeniable case that even the company can't ignore. If HR won't take action, you can use this evidence to escalate the issue, either through legal channels or by finding a new role where you won't have to constantly look over your shoulder." Costi says LinkedIn is a good place to find a community — though she does caution to avoid specifics like names or your place of work.

Not everyone agrees that LinkedIn is the right venue to tackle toxic workplaces.

"Publicly airing grievances can erode respect within a team and contribute to a negative work environment," Galvin says. "Leaders play a crucial role in fostering a culture of open, constructive communication and guiding employees to address concerns through appropriate internal channels. Regular check-ins, mentorship programs, and conflict-resolution strategies can help prevent issues from escalating to public social media."

Tim Glowa, the founder and CEO of HR Brain, says that "rather than venting online, reporting helps build a proper case while ensuring confidentiality and protecting your professional reputation," adding, "What you post online can follow you indefinitely." LinkedIn representatives declined to comment on the record about toxic culture and posting.

Some experts argue that HR can be valuable, and there are certainly cases where it makes sense to look into legal counsel.

Nicole Brenecki, an employment attorney in New York, says that airing your dirty laundry about work on LinkedIn might be OK if you keep it vague. "However, I would advise against publishing any factual statements regarding a specific company in the event there is litigation in the future stemming from the employee's allegations of a toxic workplace environment," she says.

Brenecki also notes why it might make sense to go to HR. If you're experiencing harassment, discrimination, or other bad behavior at work, the company likely prefers that you go to HR so it can handle the situation according to state employment laws. If you don't go to HR, the company could later be found legally liable for allowing discrimination or retaliation.

"If such a company does not maintain a properly functioning HR department, any violations of employment law, particularly intentional ones, will be their liability," she says.


Workplace experts say workplace toxicity ultimately won't be resolved by HR, the courts, or LinkedIn. They made the case for employees working out issues together and holding each other accountable.

"Technology has given us more convenient escapes from the vulnerability required to solve relationship problems," says Joseph Grenny, a cofounder of the corporate training company VitalSmarts who wrote the book "Crucial Conversations." "Our interpersonal muscles are atrophying, which accounts for some of the loneliness, alienation, and disconnection that characterizes today's world." He suggests that the answer might be found through tough, direct conversations with colleagues.

"An important predictor of your capacity to be heard is how psychologically safe the other person feels," Granny says. "If they believe your agenda is to hurt them, they will use their power against you. If they believe you care about their interests and concerns (as well as your own), they are far less likely to be defensive."

Costi argues that workplace toxicity is just too prevalent and that people don't feel safe going to HR or dealing with the issue themselves.

Last July, she founded a startup called The Rising Heard, which provides legal advice, coaching, and education to people who have experienced toxic workplaces. She plans to continue posting her whiteboard comments for all to see.

"I've faced trolling from those who deny the existence of such issues," she says. "While I've considered these warnings, I always respond with: Standing up for what's right might be risky, but staying silent in the face of injustice is a far greater loss."


John Brandon is a journalist who has published over 15,000 articles on social media, technology, leadership, mentoring, and many other topics. He has published two books including his latest, The Seven Minute Productivity Solution.

Read the original article on Business Insider

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