How To Help Your Kids Through That Post-Holiday Back-To-School Slump
Winter break is a tricky thing. You’re wondering how you’re going to keep your kids occupied with all that time off, and then before you know it, you’re wondering how to make the transition back to school go smoothly (for us just as much as them!). As much as we love our kids, we might be ready for them to go back — but chances are, they aren’t so thrilled about the prospect. And can we really blame them? Anyone with a job has had at least a handful of occasions where they felt less-than-enthusiastic about clocking in, especially after a stretch of time off, so we know the feeling. Returning to school after winter break, going from all the downtime in the world to your typical busy schedule, can be hard for anyone … and it’s even worse if your kids aren’t the hugest fans of school to begin with.
“During these breaks, routines often change. Sleep schedules shift. Peer pressure, bullying, and the unpleasantries associated with the social hierarchy are on pause. Homework and class projects stop,” Dr. Leesha M. Ellis-Cox, MD, MPH told Motherly. “Kids may feel like they can finally relax and breathe without all the stress which can make it extraordinarily difficult to return to school and back to the literal grind.”
It’s never going to be completely painless, but you and your kids don’t have to dread it too much if you take a few simple steps to make sure everyone is … well, as ready as they can possibly be.
Get back into a routine.
If you’re like most parents (raises hand), your kids — especially if they’re older — have had a pretty lax bedtime routine during the break. They stay up later at night and sleep later in the morning, which is great because it gives us worn-out parents a nice break from the nagging and difficult wake-ups. However, the break is almost over, and not getting back into the swing of things where bedtime is concerned is going to make it really difficult when they suddenly have to be up and at ’em at the crack of dawn again. Having them go to bed progressively earlier each evening leading up to school, for at least a few days — and waking them up at the usual time, or at least close to it — will ensure that the back-to-school bedtimes and wake-ups are at least a smidge easier.
Have a countdown calendar.
Kinda like an advent calendar (although admittedly not quite as fun), a visual countdown to the start of school can help kids mentally prepare themselves so that it doesn’t feel quite as abrupt.
Give them something to look forward to.
Did your child get a new outfit or shoes for Christmas? Hype up how nice it’ll be to wear it to school and look really cool. Or grab them a special lunch box treat next time you’re at the grocery store. Or promise them an after-school trip for ice cream or a smoothie. If there’s a bright spot in their return to school, they’ll be less reluctant. It doesn’t have to be big; even the smallest gesture can be something to look forward to.
Prepare as best you can.
That first back-to-school morning after an extended break can be tough enough without scrambling like mad to make sure everything is in order. The night before, locate backpacks and make sure they’re cleaned out and ready to go (and that nobody has homework they forgot to do, or left a banana to rot on the last day of school). Have your kid pick what they’re going to wear, and lay it out — including socks and shoes, so nobody has to go on a last-minute finding frenzy. If your kid is the comfy-joggers-and-T-shirt type, you can have them go to bed in their clothes so they don’t even have to get dressed in the morning and can maximize every last moment of sleep. Have a plan for breakfast and for getting out the door on time. These small preparations will go a long way on a morning when everyone is dragging their feet.
Do some “brain refreshers”.
Having a “brain break” from academics is not a bad thing! But jumping right from mindlessly scrolling TikTok, playing games, or watching YouTube videos into the expectation of thinking critically, paying attention and absorbing information, and doing homework can be tricky. For younger kids, there are a ton of educational gaming apps that combine learning and fun; we like Khan Academy Kids: Learning! and fun games like Sushi Monster. For older kids — especially teens — it may be tougher to convince them they should watch/read/play/listen to something educational. Nevertheless, you can at least throw the options out there and encourage them to try; gorgeously-illustrated puzzle games like The Room (available on both Apple and Google Play) are engaging and encourage out-of-the-box thinking, and YouTube channels like Crash Course offer fun, quick lessons on science, history, logic, and more complete with fun Pop-Up Video-style factoids.
Set the tone.
Kids, like the little (and big!) sponges they are, will absorb the energies around them — so if we’re stressed out, anxious, and negative about something, chances are they will be too. “Parents always have the power to turn any ‘mood-ship’ around, from happy to unhappy and from unhappy to happy,” Jacqueline Pirtle, mindfulness and happiness coach and author of 365 Days of Happiness: Because Happiness Is a Piece of Cake!, told NBC News. Which is why it’s especially important for us to tackle the day with a positive mindset — and we’ve got some great tips for feeling more positive here.
Let them pick some tunes.
If you drive your child to school, let them have full command of the radio on the way. Even if they ride the bus or any other mode of transportation, blasting some tunes they love while they’re getting ready in the morning can be a much-needed mood booster.
Hear them out and validate.
You may not be able to fix the problem — the “problem” being that they have to return to school, whether they like it or not — but you can validate the fact that they’re bummed out about it. Everybody likes to feel seen! Validating kids’ anxieties, fears, and outright gripes empowers them to face challenges with resilience and confidence, knowing they have your support and understanding. Just let them know you get it; sometimes it’s hard for you to get going after a break, too. But be genuine, the health professionals at Kaiser Permanente advise: “Kids can often tell when adults mean what they say, versus when they’re just saying the ‘right words’.” Show that you truly understand — because who doesn’t?! — and instead of telling them to relax or stop worrying about it, simply allow them to vent and feel what they’re feeling. Then, if it feels right, you can go through the upcoming schedule to reassure them, or remind them of that treat they’ll have waiting after school.
Returning to school after winter break is never gonna be your kid’s favorite option. But since it’s something they have to do, it’s worth taking a few extra steps to make sure the transition is as smooth as possible — not only for them, but for us parents, too.