I don’t like my daughter – it makes me feel like a horrible mum but she’s taken the joy out of parenting
A MUM has caused controversy after revealing she doesn’t “like” her daughter, thanks to her “passive aggressive” behaviour.
The woman explained that her “sweet little girl” has been “replaced by a brooding, know it all, passive aggressive roommate”.
She added that she knew something was wrong because a lot of her mum friends have been “upset that their kids are leaving/ left for college”, while she is “looking forward to it”.
“I’m tired, she exhausts me,” she added in the Reddit post, which was titled: “I don’t like my 18-year-old daughter”.
“She has taken the joy out of parenting,” the woman concluded, adding that her remarks make her “feel like a horrible mother”.
And people in the comments section were divided as to whether the woman was wrong or right in the way she was dealing with things.
“Sounds like some toxicity on the parents part too, ya know?” one wrote.
“My mum didn’t like me from early teens through adulthood,” another added.
“She finally did a lot of self reflective work and has made efforts to just love me back.
“It breaks my heart to read this because I wasn’t a bad kid, and my mom hurt me a lot.
“When I decided I was done trying it came out as passive aggressive.”
“There a lot of women who grew up in your daughter’s shoes, and it’s a really painful place to be when your mum can’t accept you growing from their little doll to a women with thoughts and opinions.
“I recommend some counseling to come to terms with the change and work toward loving the person she now is.”
“A perfect parent can’t always raise a perfect child,” a third commented.
“No child is perfect and their personality is genetic.
“Sure they pick up things from their parents but that’s not the only thing that makes them who they are or how they act.”
However, others insisted they were similarly “passive aggressive” as teenagers, and have changed their ways since they’ve aged.
“I am confident my mum felt this way about me…and now I’m 31, a mum myself, and talk to my mum 2-3 times a day…and I pray my daughter isn’t as awful as I was at that age!!” one wrote.
How long should kids be on screens?
Dr Amanda, who's a parenting expert and child psychologist gave a general guide for parents who wish to limit screen time.
Age 1-3 years old
How long: 5 minutes per year of life in one sitting
Dr Gummer says: “If you are really hoping your child will learn from the screen time they have then one rule of thumb is that on average children can concentrate for 5 minutes per year of their life (i.e. 15 minutes at age 3).”
Age 1+
How long: 1 hour per day
Dr Gummer says: “For younger children we feel that around 1 hour per day is a sensible limit to aim for on a regular weekday.
“Once you add together time on mobile devices, TV, computers and other devices with screens this may not seem like much (and remember children may get screen time at school).”
Age 2+
How long: 2 hour per day
Dr Gummer says: “Various sources including the American Academy of Paediatrics recommend no more than 2 hours per day (for children aged 2 and over).”
Children of all ages
Over two hours a day is excessive usage
Dr Gummer says: “A recent study saw some detrimental effects in teenagers that used more than 3 hours per day of screen time and consider this ‘excessive usage’
“Just continue to be a supportive mom, give space when needed, and love her through her figuring out who she is…and she’ll come back like a boomerang hopefully like I did!”
“I was a ‘good kid’ and never got into any trouble, but I know I gave my mom a hard time anyway,” another added.
“She said a few years ago that she remembered looking forward to Thursday night every week because that’s when a show we both enjoyed was on and it was the one hour each week we would spend together without arguing.”
“Yup same… my poor mom had to see a psychiatrist and probably cried everyday,” a third commented.
“I was out of control, but now in my mid 30’s and we text constantly and I visit her with her 2 baby grandkids like everyday.
“Hang in there!”