I'm a middle-class mother of 4. I start a holiday budget early and do a lot of research before buying presents.

• My first Christmas as a mom, I spent $150 on gifts for our almost 1-year-old.
• Now things are more expensive than 19 years ago, and we have more kids.
• I create a budget and ask for gift wish lists early in the year to determine my spending limit.

I remember my very first Christmas as a mother. We spent about $150 on our almost year old son. Toys were cheap and purchased in fits and bursts at Target and local toy stores. The rest of our Christmas money went to purchasing family gifts in a sort of Yankee swap.

Nineteen Christmases later, things look much different. The holiday I once loved has become an expensive endeavor. Gone are the days of shopping for others. Christmas is tough, especially with four kids to shop for and rising prices due to inflation.

Working as a special education teacher in Maine roots me firmly in a middle-class income bracket. After almost two decades of shopping for multiple kids and balancing the budget to make sure it is done equitably, I have found several ways to make Christmas work for my family without going into debt or breaking the bank.

I start planning early

Saving and creating a budget is vital when shopping for Christmas. When I was young, the grandmother who raised me put money away each month into the local Christmas Club at the bank. When Christmas came, she was set. For my family, it is tight all year, and every cent matters. I do my best to save, but that isn't always realistic.

Instead of saving, I start early. This means making sure to create Christmas lists in late summer or very early fall. Once I have the Christmas lists, I can work on my budget and figure out how much money I need to try to pull each month, and I can slowly chip away at shopping. Using Google Docs or apps like Wish allows my kids to provide me with links to their Christmas wishes.

I do a lot of research before buying

Another important step in creating a special Christmas is research.

Once I have my lists, I go online and search for the item. This allows me to find the best deals. Sometimes, I have to go in person, and sometimes, I order online. By researching, I am not only saving time but also money. I can organize which stores I have to go to and make lists so I can group gifts by store. This also cuts down on what I spend on gas.

I don't buy useless stocking stuffers

I have given up on buying knick-knack-type stocking stuff for my kids. This filler winds up gathering dust or finding its way to the trash. The things I buy for my kids are things they need and can use. I may buy cute socks or fancy lip gloss, nail polish, or other beauty necessities.

Just because things are useful doesn't mean they can't be fun. Hand warmers were a saving grace for my kids while waiting for the bus in the cold New England winters. Gum is a necessity for one kid who battles anxiety, and fidgets have become a must for another who often loses focus. My older kids get car air fresheners and body spray.

Sometimes, stocking stuffers are things I normally wouldn't buy, like expensive shampoos or soaps. Not only will my kids use them, but they also are bigger items that fill up the extra large stockings my mother-in-law knitted by hand for all four kids several years ago.

I find other ways to make extra cash for Christmas gifts

For me, this means working hard to find freelance writing opportunities. I have also taken seasonal work. Everywhere from Target to the Post Office to FedEx hires seasonal workers and usually at a decent hourly rate. Applying is often done online, and some interviews are held virtually, so picking up a new gig requires little time and effort.

For parents with little ones, some jobs even allow you to work from home, like I do with my writing assignments. This means I can make money from the comfort of my living room after my kids go to bed or even as I sit watching their sports practice. While taking on a second or third job can be tiring, it is just for a short while and helps save me from debt.

As a parent, I have often wished for Christmas to come once every two years. Since I know that isn't a possibility, I've learned to find ways to make filling under the Christmas tree a more affordable and less stressful endeavor. This allows me more time to focus on what is most important: spending the holidays surrounded by family and friends. That's what the season is all about.