The Ultimate Guide to Mom Stereotypes: Which One Are You?

Even after almost two decades of momming, I don’t know if I could fit my parenting style into a box. Sometimes I’m the chill, laid-back mom — and other times, much to my kids’ chagrin, I’m the exact opposite. It just depends on the circumstances (and the kid!). I feel like I’m a constantly-changing kaleidoscope of parenting styles, because raising children is nothing if not a lesson in rolling with the punches, amiright?

But people love to put labels on things, moms included. Back in the 1960s, psychologist Diana Baumrind first put parenting styles into three categories: you were either authoritarian, authoritative, or permissive. Then in Amy Chua’s 2011 book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, she coined the term “tiger mom” — a way to describe her own super-strict upbringing. Since then, America has been obsessed with micro-labeling every possible type of mother, from Silky Mom to Scrunchy Mom to Pink Tote Lid Mom. What’s next — Bedazzled Mom? Vegan Cheeseburger Mom? Gum-Stuck-To-The-Bottom-Of-Your-Shoe Mom? The options, it seems, are endless!

Here, we’ve broken down some of the various parenting styles. Can you see yourself in any of these stereotypical moms?

Tiger Mom

The mom who started it all — thanks, Amy Chua! The Tiger Mom’s superpowers are her ability to sense someone slacking off from miles away, and to make her kids feel overwhelmingly guilty for doing anything other than studying. If you’re a Tiger Mom’s kid, you’re not just a child — you’re a future Nobel Prize winner or Olympian or, at the very least, a neurosurgeon. And if you’re not? It’s probably because of the B+ you got on your homework that one time, which makes you both a slacker and a disappointment.

Almond Mom

What’s that you’re eating? A lettuce leaf? Then you’re fine — at least in the eyes of your Almond Mom. These moms want their kids to be anything except overweight, and they’ve got the diet plans to prove it. Dessert? Not on these moms’ watch! Unless it’s sugar-free, fat-free, and fun-free, of course. Just go drink some water, honey, it’ll make you feel full!

Elephant Mom

If you’ve seen an actual mother elephant, you’ll know she’ll protect her calf at all costs — and a similar parenting style is how the Elephant Mom gets her name. Elephant Mom prioritizes her kid’s happiness and wellbeing over everything else: academics, athletics, relationships. If they don’t feel comforted or supported, well, the well-meaning Elephant Mom will fix that … whether her kid actually needs her to or not. Wanna quit the team you signed up for after just a few practices? Go for it. Wanna live in the basement ’til you’re 30? She’ll bring down Pizza Rolls when your friends visit.

Silky Mom

The Silky Mom started her Silky-Momming journey from the moment she chose a medicated hospital birth. She’s going to use every possible modern convenience to make having and raising kids go as smoothly as possible. Screen time? Absolutely. Disposable diapers and paper plates? You bet. No natural home remedies for this mom; just hand over the antibiotics and Tylenol. The employees at McDonalds and Starbucks know her by name.

Crunchy Mom

On the opposite end of the spectrum of Silky Mom, we find Crunchy Mom … wearing her baby in an organic fair-trade cotton sling, of course, and swilling kombucha while simultaneously making her own baby food (likely from the pesticide-free produce she grew herself). Plastics, antibiotics, and vaccines are a hard no for Crunchy Mom, but she swears there’s an essential oil that will cure whatever ails you. When her tiny tot grows older, there’s no heading off to kindergarten; Crunchy Mom prefers to “unschool” so her kids won’t be indoctrinated by those pesky public school opinions. And there’s probably a placenta in her freezer.

Helicopter Mom

Like her style’s namesake, Helicopter Mom hovers around to swoop in at a moment’s notice to protect her kid from any type of threat — real or perceived. She oversees every tiny aspect of her kid’s life, because in her eyes, the moment she loosens her grip is the moment she loses control … and she knows best, right? After all, kids, who else will argue with your teacher for better grades or your coach for more play time? Who else will call your friend’s mom to “work things out” when you and your bestie get into an argument? Who else will bubble wrap you before you go to the playground?

Sherpa Mom

Meet the mom who’s always carrying the family’s load: the Sherpa Mom! (If you’re unfamiliar, a sherpa is a mountain guide who helps carry hikers’ supplies into the furthest reaches of the Himalayas.) The Sherpa Mom is at the beach — with the Bogg bag loaded with towels, extra towels, sunscreen, pool toys, reading materials, dry clothes for later, snacks, a first aid kit, baby wipes, an epi-pen, and lord only knows what else — simultaneously schlepping a full-sized sun umbrella, a cooler, and several small children. But it goes beyond the physical. The Sherpa Mom also carries the load of the household chores, the full duty of remembering all the dates and appointments and permission slips, and the carpools. Nobody else in the family needs to lift a finger, literally or figuratively. Why should they, when Sherpa Mom is there to shoulder the burden on their behalf?

Free Range Mom

If you’re looking for the Free Range Mom, you might find her doing any number of activities: checking her email, reading a book, doing the laundry. Know what you won’t find her doing? Hovering over her kids. In fact, she may not even know where they are, since she hasn’t seen them in a couple hours. They took off into the woods, but she’s sure they’re just fine. She doesn’t come from a place of selfish neglect; she just thinks kids should be free to learn life lessons on their own, even if those lessons are hard, by navigating the world independently. (Go ahead, toddler, stick your fingers in that outlet — you’ll learn not to do it again.) No coddling for Free Range Mom!

Dolphin Mom

Coined by psychiatrist and scientist Dr. Shimi Kang, the term “Dolphin Mom” is a mother whose parenting style can be described like the body of a dolphin: firm, but flexible. She has a middle-of-the-road approach, knowing when to back off and when to dive in and help. She’ll let her kid learn a hard lesson on their own, but be there with hugs and support in the aftermath. Given her balanced parenting style, Dolphin Mom probably has the smallest chance that her kid will end up complaining about her from a therapist’s couch someday.

Scrunchy Mom

She’s not quite silky, and she’s not quite crunchy — so she’s Scrunchy Mom! Scrunchy Mom will make sure her kids are vaccinated and won’t hesitate to get them antibiotics if they need it, but she’ll use essential oils for non-emergency situations. She co-sleeps, but lets her kid watch the iPad for a few minutes when they get into bed. She buys BPA-free cups, but cleans her bathroom with bleach … ’cause kids are nasty, and sometimes those nontoxic cleaners just don’t cut it.

Martyr Mom

Oh, you need some laundry done? Martyr Mom will do it … as soon as she can get up from the toilet, because, you know, she’s got this stomach virus. It’s probably because her immune system was vulnerable thanks to lack of sleep, from all those late nights she spends whipping up things for PTO bake sales and writing out meal plans for the week. “But don’t you worry about me!” she says. “It’s not like anybody else does!” Martyr Mom suffers for the sake of her family, putting everyone else’s needs before her own; she takes one for the team, but she makes sure everyone knows it, proclaiming her exhaustion and selflessness to anyone who looks remotely like they’re listening.

Gentle Mom

Her kid might be throwing an epic tantrum in the middle of Target, but the Gentle Mom doesn’t deal with it through gritted teeth or with hissed threats. She’s probably down on their level, trying to make eye contact, telling them in hushed, sympathetic tones that she understands why they’re frustrated (as people swerve around them with their carts, doling out generous amounts of side-eye). Gentle Mom’s sole mission is to — tenderly and respectfully and with the patience of a saint — get to the bottom of anything that’s bothering her kid. You’ll never hear her raise her voice, and an exasperated “Just! Get! Your shoes on!” is not in her parenting vocabulary.

Pink Tote Mom

What started as a teenager posting a TikTok about an argument with her mom ignited the birth of a new parenting type: the Pink Tote Mom. The Pink Tote Mom is having a bad day (or a bad week, or a bad year) and she will absolutely be taking it out on her kids. Even the tiniest perceived transgression will spark an outsized — and outraged — reaction. All moms have their moments of misplacing their anger occasionally, but the Pink Tote Mom has it down to a science. ARE YOU STUPID?!? No, you just have a Pink Tote Mom.

Lawnmower Mom

The Lawnmower Mom is sometimes also known as the Bulldozer or Snowplow Mom — because in all cases, she’s an expert at clearing all obstacles out of her kid’s path before they ever have to encounter any unpleasantness. Need your saxophone for band class but forgot it at home? She’ll leave work to deliver it before the bell rings. Struggling with your science project? She’ll stay up until 3 a.m. doing it for you. Not sure you’ll get into college? She’ll rig your application.

I don’t know about you, but I think I’ve been guilty of being all of these moms at one point or another. Am I more of a Scrunchy Dolphin? A Gentle Sherpa? A Silky Elephant with Pink Tote moments here and there? I recognize pieces of myself in nearly every description. Do we really need to slap a label on the way we love our kids? Motherhood is a wild ride of twists, turns, and tantrums — and even if we don’t all approach those things in the same way, we’re all just doing the best we can with what we’ve got.