I uninvited my fiance’s work colleague from our wedding, he thinks I’m jealous but a six word remark sealed their fate
A WOMAN who uninvited one of her fiancé’s colleagues from their wedding has revealed why she did it.
After spending the best part of the year carefully planning the big day, the 29-year-old woman confessed her husband-to-be’s ‘work wife’ has cast a shadow over the whole thing.
They’ve been working together for 30 years and are pretty close, she admitted on Reddit.
In fact, they spend a lot of time messaging each other, leaving the wife-to-be feeling like a third wheel in her own relationship.
But things took a turn for the worse at the couple’s engagement party when she overheard her partner and his ‘work wife’ talking.
She apparently told him that he could “always marry me instead,” leaving the woman stunned.
That’s when the bride-to-be decided not to invite her to the wedding.
“At first, I was honestly relieved he had a good friend at work, especially since his job can be demanding and a bit isolating,” she wrote on Reddit.
“I tried to be the cool, understanding partner who wasn’t bothered by how close they were.
“But over time, their bond became… well, it became something I just don’t know how to handle.”
The bride added that their relationship isn’t always appropriate, with them often talking late at night and sharing inside jokes.
“She knows things about him that I sometimes don’t, and it stings to realise how much he turns to her for advice and laughs instead of me.
“My fiancé reassures me that they’re just friends, that she’s his work wife, and that it’s no big deal.
‘But it feels like she’s gotten so close that I’m sometimes the one on the outside looking in,” she added.
The work wife even took issue with the wedding venue when she found out where it would take place, as well as the flowers because “he’s never liked bright colours”.
And her qualms with the big day didn’t end there; she even told the bride her future husband wouldn’t like her dress because she “knew his style”.
The bride said she tried to laugh it off, but her little jabs hurt and left her feeling insecure about her relationship.
Things finally came to a head at the engagement party when she overheard their conversation and was once again left feeling left out.
After the party, she confronted her partner about the comment, but he brushed it off, saying his work wife was “just playing around”.
She said: “I felt like I was going crazy, like maybe I was seeing something that wasn’t there, but… how would anyone be okay hearing that from someone so close to their fiancé?”
That’s when she decided to uninvite her from the big day because she was getting too close for comfort, but her partner didn’t agree.
He hit back, stating that uninviting her now would “damage his reputation at work”.
Fellow Reddit users told the bride that uninviting her was the right thing to do, with some noting that their relationship sounded like an “emotional affair”.
One said: “Her comments are completely inappropriate, and your fiancé’s willingness to side with her and choose her over you is hugely concerning.
“I can absolutely predict on the day of the wedding she is going to try to insert herself into everything.”
And another agreed: “He sees the situation as having to choose between the two women. He already puts his co-worker on the same plane as his fiancée; which means he is not committed to the fundamental premise of marriage, which is to forsake all others.
“He has zero concept of emotional boundaries and needs some schooling.”
Four red flags your partner is cheating
Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating.
They start to take their phone everywhere with them
In close relationships, it’s normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
Aaron says: “If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful.”
“You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don’t want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it’s an easy way to get caught out,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren’t there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify.
“To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven’t walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating,” warns Aaron.