I was a Playboy bunny & the sex was robotic hell – Hef has a 5-step seduction method but a teen boy would have more clue
CRYSTAL Hefner, Hugh Hefner’s last wife, has opened up on the ‘robotic’ sex she endured when living in the Playboy Mansion.
The Playboy bunny, 38, met the millionaire – who was known as the ‘Godfather of the sexual revolution’ – when she was just 21 and he was 60 years her senior, at a Halloween party in 2008.
Five years later, on New Years Eve 2012, Hugh tied the knot aged 86, with Crystal, his third wife, who was 26 at the time, in front of family and a few close friends, in the iconic Mansion.
But now, Crystal, who was married to the lothario for almost five years until he died in September 2017, has opened up on what really went on behind closed doors at the Mansion.
In her book, Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself, she spilled all on her time at the Mansion, including the “odd and robotic” sex Hugh required of her and the other girls around at the time.
Crystal wrote: “This was a well-oiled and well-practiced sequence of events. One that went the same exact way every time.
“Picking some girls from the party and bringing them up. Changing into the uniform for the job: silk pyjamas.”
Not only did the girls have to wear sexy pyjamas as their uniform, but Crystal also detailed Hugh’s five-step seduction method, which even a teenage boy could compete with.
She penned: “The dimming of the lights. The music. The porn. Passing the pot. And then the sex.”
She claimed that contrary to popular belief, the bedroom antics at the Mansion were never “fun” or “sexy”.
The blonde beauty added: “Hef was just going through the motions of something that had once been fun and sexy. Or maybe it was never fun and sexy.”
And whilst it turns out that group sex was the norm for Hef, Crystal claimed that she actually preferred this to having to have intercourse with him alone – what she called their “little blue pill nights.”
She claimed that her husband at the time required medication and music to perform, so she would turn on the same Madonna song, Dress You Up, each time to ensure “no other music [would] be contaminated by this place” for her.
But this isn’t the first time Crystal has opened up on sex with Hugh.
Facts you didn't know about the Playboy Mansion
Girlfriends vs Playmates
Rumour has it that Hugh Hefner would have two to a dozen “girlfriends” living with him at a time. These girlfriends are not to be confused with Playmates. Each girlfriend had their own room, but one “special lady” was named as girlfriend number one and stayed with Hef in his room. Each girlfriend received a $1,000 (£760) weekly bonus “allowance.”
Hef’s Wild side
The Playboy mansion was home to a private zoo. It was one of very few private residences that actually has a zoo license. Hefner was a fan of birds. Among his collection – many of which roamed the grounds – were peacocks, macaws, flamingos, toucans and ducks.
The Elvis Legend
Within the mansion was a secret room, called “The Elvis Room.” Legend has it that the King himself, Elvis Presley, had a little slumber party in the room with up to eight eager bunnies.
Previously, Crystal sat down with Howard Stern, a broadcaster and media personality, and painted a less than idyllic picture of what really went on with her and her Playboy husband.
“I’m not turned on by Hef, sorry,” she laughed after saying sex with the most famous Playboy in the world lasted “about two seconds”.
It was never fun and sexy
Crystal Hefner
But when Hugh passed, after the funeral, Crystal told People: “I am heartbroken. I am still in disbelief…He was an American hero. A pioneer.
“A kind and humble soul who opened up his life and home to the world. I felt how much he loved me. I loved him so much. I am so grateful.
“He gave me life. He gave me direction. He taught me kindness.
“I will feel eternally grateful to have been by his side, holding his hand, and telling him how much I love him.
“He changed my life, he saved my life. He made me feel loved every single day.”