Matthew McConaughey's Tequila Pantalones is (sigh) alright, alright, alright
Welcome back to FTW’s Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage (or food) that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey.
There’s no hotter trend amongst celebrities than creating their own flagship liquor. And in that subset, there’s no spirit hotter than tequila.
Everyone from George Clooney to The Rock to Guy Fieri has thrown their hat in the ring when it comes to baking and distilling agave. This has led to some hits, some misses and what I can only assume are truckloads of money, given the sheer amount of music, movie and other stars in the lineup.
This was too much for Matthew McConaughey to pass up. Admittedly, he didn’t sound entirely jazzed about the product — he’s quoted in the press release accompanying the booze’s debut as saying “the world doesn’t need another celebrity tequila.” But the world didn’t need a Vince Vaughn season of True Detective either and McConaughey had executive producer credits on that, so here we are.
Anyway, Tequila Pantalones, from McConaughey and his wife Camila, is distilled in the same place as Tres Agaves. Does it bring anything new to the table, or is it just a cash grab? Let’s find out.
Pantalones tequila reposado : B
The smell off the top of the pour is sweet and salty. There’s enough agave there to let you know you’re dealing with a tequila, but enough fruit, spice and … a little butter (?) to let you know it’s a decent one.
That sweetness is the first thing that hits your lips. It lingers throughout the sip, making it the headline even after it’s cleared your throat. That brings a certain softness to the whole affair. You’d think that would be to counteract a harsh, boozy burn but, nope. There’s the obvious warmth of an 80 proof spirit, but nothing that would make you wince.
As such, it’s pretty solid as a sipper or a shooter. It’s a mellow reposado that isn’t especially complex but brings elements of the barrel aging that got us here. There’s a little vanilla, some oak and just enough tropical fruit to reward you for sticking with it.
It’s not gonna wow you, but you’ll enjoy each sip. At $45 per bottle, that’s a decent value. Maybe not perfect — I’d like it a lot more at $10 cheaper — but you won’t be disappointed.
Would I drink it instead of a Hamm’s?
This is a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I’m drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That’s the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm’s. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I eat Pantalones tequila over a cold can of Hamm’s?
Yeah, I’d mix in a glass or two before moving on to beer. It’s tasty enough as a sipper or in a cocktail.