We did a Halloween candy draft and someone picked Candy Corn

How does anyone pick candy corn?

Halloween is upon us and it’s a holiday everyone can enjoy without too much angst or argument.

SO LET’S ADD ANGST AND ARGUMENT TO THIS THING!

It’s time once again for our Halloween candy draft, a yearly tradition where we compete over selecting the best candy draft classes, argue over our decisions, and agree as a company to make fun of David Fucillo’s undying love of Candy Corn.

If you saw our candy draft last year you know we were struck by absolute anarchy. A lack of discussion prior to the draft led to a mass Reece’s situation where every variant of the candy was selected, with our staff being split 50/50 on whether they were different candies or the same. So this year we had a clear rubric that only four Reece’s types would be allowed (Pumpkins, Cups, Mini Cups, Pieces), and with Skittles only regular and sour were allowed.

This was your classic fantasy football-style snake draft. So keep that in mind as you see the pick order. Here is how our four round draft went down.

James Dator

1. Twix
2. Haribo Gummy Bears
3. Starburst
4. Mr. Goodbar

My aim in this class was to have a solid draft that equally focused on offense (candy) and defense (chocolate). I’ll show my work here on why I characterize candy thusly.

See, true candy (predominantly fruit-based) is a tastebud bomb. It’s there to excite, offer a little razzle-dazzle, do what nothing else can achieve. Chocolate on the other hand, is your defense. It’s always there, always reliable, and you when you just “want something sweet,” but can’t put your finger on it, then chocolate is there.

Twix was always going to be a high pick for me. Knowing Reece’s was going off the board at pick No. 1 meant I wasn’t going to settle for a lesser-form of the peanut butter based candy, and decided to lock up what I consider to be a top-tier chocolate. It’s sweet, crunchy, chewy. It checks all the boxes.

I zagged a little on my second pick, and admittedly Skittles going one pick before thew me into a bit of a frenzy. Nevertheless, I’ll happily accept the top-tier gummy bears on the board to be an elite choice.

Three was just value. If you see Starburst in the third round, you take it.

Now, a lot of people might hate on Mr. Goodbar, but I think it’s a supremely capable chocolate bar that offered a nut component my draft was lacking.

I’m not going to pretend I nailed this draft or gloat about what I did. Instead I’ll just say I didn’t have a single bad pick of the bunch and quite literally nobody would get a bag of my draft choices and be unhappy.

Mark Schofield

1. Reese’s Mini Cups

2. Skittles

3. M&Ms

4. Skittles (Sour)

Picking fourth, I’m feeling fairly good that I’ll get at least one of my top four, which is one of the four agreed-upon varieties of Reese’s: Pieces, Miniature Cups, Regular Cups, and Halloween-themed. A bit worried that Pieces fall to me, my least-favorite of the group, which might require a shift in strategy.

And somehow, the mini cups have fallen to me. I can honestly stop drafting right now, these are my absolute favorites in the entire candy universe and I’m absolutely fine with how the rest of this draft plays out.

But grabbing Skittles in the second round? My candy Number Two on my personal candy big board? I’m totally crushing this draft in my personal opinion. At this point I’ve got three other candy options I’m looking at: Starburst, Sour Patch Kids, and Three Musketeers. Give me one or two of those and I’m totally content.

Jared grabbed Sour Patch Kids with his pick in the second round, so that stings a bit, but we forge on. We can slide regular M&Ms into that Sour Patch Kids slot, and we’re okay with getting two of the three.

James snipes me by picking Starburst right before I’m on the clock, so we shift gears and go with regular M&Ms in the third round. A solid, safe third-round selection.

Still, with Fooch on the clock twice before I’m up again, I know at least one pick will be his annual selection of candy corn, so I feel pretty good about Three Musketeers falling to me in the fourth round. Feel like that slid to me a year ago.

And Fooch goes with candy corn right after the M&M pick, so we’re in a good place. Krackel and Peanut M&Ms go of the board to Kyle with his two picks, so feeling pretty good.

But at the last minute, a change of heart. We’re going with sour Skittles, because missing out on the Sour Patch Kids, I wanted a sour flavor profile, and we get that by doubling up on Skittles.

So Reese’s mini cups, Skittles (two ways) and M&Ms. A candy haul to be proud of.

Kyle Thele

1. KitKat
2. Milky Way
3. Krackel
4. Peanut M&Ms

Every year the candy draft comes down to two types of strategies – flashy and guaranteed to be too sweet; or hard working, in the trenches classic candy that can be consistently snacked on from Halloween through New Years. I feel great about most of my draft, getting KitKat in the first round set the table and finishing with Peanut M&M’s is what championships are made of. But I’ll admit, I panicked in the second round. Did not prepare for the snake draft and reached on Milky Way. It’s a strong candy that is always welcome, but would have been a stronger pick later in the draft.

Jared Mueller

1. Snickers
2. Sour Patch Kids
3. Smarties Lollipops
4. Reese’s Pieces

Getting the second pick made things somewhat easy as I wasn’t going to select the second Reese’s option. Snickers are solid, feel like they have some protein or something in them and they always satisfy. I knew I wanted to go sour or fruit for my second pick, I like offsetting things, so my favorite movie candy made sense there.

In the third round I was proud to read this reaction to my selection: “jared with a stunner.” If you don’t know what Smarties Lollipops are the picture is below but it is important to share the why behind the selection. While I cover the NFL and love it, baseball was my first love and I always got a lollipop (we called them suckers) when I went to my older brother’s games before I could play. Little Jared loved those darn things and they still hold a special place in my heart with fond childhood memories. If you haven’t had one, you probably won’t like them. If you did as a kid, you will love them like me.

Reese’s Pieces in the fourth round was a freaking steal.

David Fucillo

1. Reese’s PB cups (regular)
2. Nestle Crunch
3. Candy Corn
4. Hot Tamales

All I have to say is the candy corn haters can suck it.

JP Acosta

1 . Reese’s Pumpkins
2. Peanut Butter M&Ms
3. Hershey’s
4. Airheads

So I had the first pick in the draft, which meant I had to wait a long time to make my next picks because we’re doing a snake draft I had the last pick in every other round. A good spot, not my intended position but we move nonetheless. The first choice here was obvious; Reese’s Pumpkins are the best Halloween candy, full stop. This was like picking the franchise left tackle first overall, a no brainer if you ask me. My second round pick was also leaning on peanut butter with the Peanut Butter M&Ms, so I decided to double down on the richness of the chocolate and add Hersheys, which I think is good value in the third round. I knew with my final pick I wanted something with some fruit, a little spice in the chocolate-based draft I put together. UNFORTUNATELY, the establishment told me I couldn’t draft Wild Berry Skittles (what happened to the game I love). Instead, I went ahead and drafted Airheads, an Acosta family staple. Growing up, we always had Airheads and got so many one year we had enough candy to last us into February. I intended to grab Sour Patch Kids with this later pick, but it went earlier.

Despite the board not falling the way I hoped, I still think this draft was very good. Best in the class, if you ask me.