I’m trying to embrace my pale skin as a fake tan addict – I had a breakdown but I’d save over £320 a year

LIKE millions of beauty buffs around the world, I’ve been religiously using fake tan since my early teenage years.

Growing up in the Baltics – and much like in the UK – the sun rarely makes an appearance but I’ve always felt more confident sporting a warm and bronzed look.

In my younger years there was pressure to ‘fit in’, fuelled by images on the front of magazines which featured so-called beautiful women on their covers.

In 1923 fashion icon Coco Chanel returned from the French Riviera with a sun tan and in 1929, Vogue infamously called for women to be bronzed. Even Harper’s Bazaar claimed that if you didn’t have a glow to your skin, you weren’t part of the rage.

Since then, the fake tan industry has exploded – in 2023, the self-tanning market was valued at $1.09billion worldwide, Fortune Business Insights reported.

In the UK, a staggering 16% of people have used self-tan in the past year, with 15% using gradual tanner, 10% using pre-tan accelerator, and 10% using tanning oil or lotion without SPF, Cosmetics Design revealed.

Although I’m an advocate for learning to rock your real skin and want to encourage women to embrace their natural beauty, I’m very much a hypocrite – I confess that I don’t even follow my own advice.

I’d been thinking of ditching my tan for a while – especially, as I recently swapped my bleached blonde tresses for a brunette mane which is more natural than fake.

But I could never find the courage until it was forced on me just recently.

I got a tattoo and was told I couldn’t apply tanning mousses for a week.

I was so addicted, I even began to question whether getting inked up was really worth ditching the fake tan.

Hooked on tanning since 15

I first tried a gradual tanning lotion when I was 15 – that’s what the popular girls at my school did and I longed to be like them.

And from then on, there was no going back. Oozing confidence and a glow, it felt like I was shooting up the ranks – and even boys started paying me attention.

As trivial as it may sound, up until now my dependence on fake tan has been real – even if it was a short weekend getaway, I’d take a small bottle of the lotion with me.

There would be some days where I’d skip the gym cause I didn’t feel tanned enough and couldn’t bear the thought of other fitness lovers seeing what my skin really looked like underneath it all.

Some girls fake tan before a special event, a wedding or a date – but I covered myself in the dark mousse even if I didn’t have anywhere to go.

Whether my skin was bright orange or resembled a fresh loaf of tiger bread, it didn’t matter – at least I wasn’t pale like a ghost.

My pals would often say they simply couldn’t be bothered with the upkeep or the stained bedsheets – but I was never one of them, and my life has been controlled by fake tan for more than a decade.

But I took the plunge and went fake tan-less for several days.

From having a meltdown to switching up my wardrobe and how much cash I saved, here’s how I got on…

Day 1 and mental prep

I realised just how many layers of tanning mousse I had on my skin after visiting a spa with friends.

Despite the masseuse vigorously scrubbing it all off, I still had to follow the same routine once I hopped in the shower afterwards.

I’m 28, and for the first time in close to 15 years, I could see my real skin – and I didn’t hate it, but (spoiler alert) that changed the following day.

Underneath it all, there was this natural glow and the realisation I could jump into my bed to watch Netflix without first having to tan was bliss.

On average, it’d take me at least 15 minutes every three nights to follow my mousse regime – without the added ten minutes in the shower, desperately trying to remove the existing patchy layer.

Time saved throughout the nine days: 1 hour and 15 minutes.

Given I fake tan on average around a staggering 121 days a year and each session takes me 25 minutes, this works out to be 65 hours every year.

In total, I’ve wasted 845 hours of my life fake tanning – or just over 35 days.

The numbers are eye-opening and make me feel sick to my stomach.

Mental breakdown and tears on Day 2

I may have saved some precious time skipping the exhausting tanning routine the night before – but the next day I came to terms with just how severe my addiction really was.

Having the morning off work, I started getting ready for the gym which means jumping into my shorts and sports bra.

But none of my kit looked right – my complexion was washed out and dull no matter what I tried on.

The colours that usually made me feel like ”the baddest b” in town suddenly did nothing for me and I cried.

I so wanted to be gleaming with confidence like Emma Stone and Taylor Swift who’d given up their signature bronzed look during Golden Globes last year – but I hated everything I saw in the mirror.

‘Kate, you’re glowing’

After pulling myself together, my legs somehow dragged me to my local gym in London, and despite being convinced every one of my pals would stare at me in pure disgust, that wasn’t the case.

”Kate, what have you done? You’re absolutely glowing today!” a friend said as she approached me for a hug.

Just moments later, one of the male personal trainers said the same thing, commenting that my new fair complexion suited me better than tanned did.

Had I really been wrong all this time? Had I been wasting money on fake tan for essentially no reason?

On average, I go through a bottle of Garnier Summer Body gradual tanning lotion (£8.50 at Sainsbury’s) in two weeks.

On top of this, 200ml of St Moriz Professional Medium Tanning Mousse (£5 at Boots) will last me pretty much the same duration.

This works out to be an astronomical £324 a year – or over £4k since I first discovered how good fake tan made me feel 13 years ago.

But will I stick to it?

It’s been nine long days without my almost nightly essential – an experiment that I never thought I’d never see through.

During this time, I’ve attended social events fake tan free – another major milestone worth chucking on my CV – have discovered that pastel clothing suits me AND I’ve been able to leave my flat without make-up.

A feat I couldn’t do before before because a pale face wouldn’t match the rest of my bronzed self.

And my bank balance has improved too.

But most importantly, I’ve learnt I don’t need hide my natural skin behind something that isn’t real.