Seven ways to guarantee great sex every time and the exact length it SHOULD last
SEX is good for you but finding the time and energy for action beneath the sheets can sometimes mean it gets slung to the bottom of the to-do list.
But breaking it down into small, manageable numbers can help get your energy for enjoyable romps back up and running.
From the minutes you should spend on foreplay to the optimum time and day of the week to get steamy, these are the numbers backed by research to guarantee pleasure in the bedroom.
3-7 MINUTE QUICKIES
Forget exhausting marathon stints, short sex sessions trigger a burst of feel-good hormones which last long after the deed is done – and between just three and seven minutes could be long enough.
A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine asked a group of sex therapists for their opinions on how long sex should last.
Results showed that “adequate” sex lasted three to seven minutes while “desirable” sex lasted seven to 13 minutes.
Sex and relationship expert Charlotte Johnson, agrees.
“Ultimately, sexual intercourse typically lasts around three to seven minutes before optimal pleasure but it’s important to consider you and your partner’s needs,” she says.
13 MINUTES ON FOREPLAY
Don’t panic men – it should take you precisely 13.41 minutes to hit the female G-spot, according to research.
“Foreplay is something that shouldn’t be rushed, as you’re warming your bodies up and intensifying your sexual chemistry before moving onto penetrative intercourse,” Charlotte says.
A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed that 13.41 minutes is the average time it takes for women to reach orgasm.
And it’s definitely worth waiting until that golden moment because the health benefits of a good orgasm are numerous.
According to a study published in the National Library of Medicine, the brain gets a workout during an orgasm because of increased blood flow.
This means, when you’re in the throes of pleasure, your brain is lighting up like a Christmas tree.
According to another study in the National Library of Medicine, a good romp can also slow down the ageing process.
This is because orgasms help to keep your blood pressure low, meaning the more orgasms you have, the more youthful you probably look.
And a study published in Harvard Health Publishing highlighted that orgasms are good for mental health too.
The best sex positions
The most searched sex positions...
- The five best sex positions for larger women
- What is the eagle sex position?
- What is the hook sex position and does it make men bigger?
- The speed bump sex position promises intense orgasms
- The snow angel sex position is the best one for winter months to heat things up
- The pumpkin spice is the best sex position to spook up your Halloween
- The pretzel-dip sex position will leave you and your partner satisfied
- These are the sex positions that will burn the most calories
- What are the best sex positions for beginners?
Follow our sex positions page for more
Orgasms release oxytocin, the “feel-good hormone,” and so having steamy sex will simply make you happier.
SET YOUR ALARM FOR 7:30 AM
Going at it in the morning – around 45 minutes after you wake up when you have the most stamina – could be the key to great sex according to research by British supplement company Forza Industries.
However, the average couple is most likely to get steamy between 9:00 PM and midnight.
“Sex at night though is typically the most common time for couples who want to have something to look forward to after a long day,” Charlotte explains.
“Plus, because orgasms release hormones oxytocin and prolactin, which aid sleep, it means you’re likely to fall asleep faster.”
However, scrap mid-morning romps – most people’s stress levels peak by 10:45 AM, meaning they’re less inclined to want or enjoy sex.
DAY SIX IS THE HOTTEST DAY
The first Saturday of the month is when couples are their horniest, says sex toy firm LoveHoney.
44% admitted Saturday was their favourite day of the week to romp.
And, although it’s a while off, circle July on the calendar because sexual activity is at its peak in the summer months as we wear fewer clothes, making us more appealing to the opposite sex.
KISS FOR FIVE MINUTES
Puckering up puts you in the mood for sex and Charlotte says kissing promotes bonding.
It can also boost immunity with an average of 80 million bacteria being transferred through saliva during a ten-second smooch.
A study published in the journal Microbiome said that couples who kissed frequently shared salivary microbiota, which forces the body to make antibodies to battle foreign bacteria.
“Kissing before sex can last anywhere from 10 seconds to five minutes and it is something that can enhance your sexual mood and bring you closer to your partner,” Charlotte says.
“Of course, this can differ depending on preference, but kissing usually continues during penetration too, strengthening your connection.”
DAY 14 FOR MIND-BLOWING ORGASMS
Ladies – for the best orgasms, have sex halfway through your monthly cycle.
“Some women find their sexual desire increases in the days leading up to ovulation and will decrease shortly after,” Charlotte says.
A 2015 review published in the National Library of Medicine explained women feel their most horny at that time because of a peak in estrogen.
And scientists believe estradiol especially – one of the three types of estrogen hormone – increases arousal in women.
After ovulation, progesterone levels overtake estrogen levels and then they both start to decline which means a woman will feel less likely to want sex.
“This would also explain why so many women feel like they want sex just before they ovulate,” Charlotte adds.
It can also be the best time for an orgasm, as you will feel more satisfaction and arousal during this time.
Charlotte Johnson
“It can also be the best time for an orgasm, as you will feel more satisfaction and arousal during this time.”
During an orgasm, your body experiences a physical release of sexual tension that has built up during the first two phases of the sexual response cycle.
Muscles in your genitals and anus rhythmically contract repeatedly, heart and breathing rate and blood pressure increase and hormones are released.
It’s these hormones that cause happiness because your body releases dopamine – the feel-good hormone – and oxytocin – sometimes also referred to as the “love drug.”
They increase feelings of happiness and counteract the “stress” hormone, cortisol.
As male hormones fluctuate much less than women’s, there is no advice on the best time of the month for men to have sex.
But research suggests to secure the best romps as a man, you should allow your testosterone levels to climb during sleep and wake up ready for sex when they’re at their peak.
ONE SEX SESSION A WEEK IS PLENTY
The eternal question for sex-active couples everywhere: How often should I be having sex?
If you’re happy with the amount of times you and your partner are having sex, then you’re having enough.
Research shown on WebMD reveals that pushing sex frequency to more than once a week may decrease your desire for, and enjoyment of, sex.
A good sex session is as vital as multiple sex sessions.
It’s important for couples to get their sex drives to sync up and to negotiate how many times a week works for both.
The secret to great sex is to avoid putting it at the bottom of your to-do list and to compromise on when to do it.
Studies show that once a week sessions are good enough to keep most marriages happy.