What I learned when my daughter asked me about abortion
"Mommy, what’s abortion?" my curious 6-year-old asked me.
That question was hurled at me two years ago, a couple of months before the U.S. Supreme Court gutted abortion rights. I had been writing a lot about the topic and, like most nosy children, Skye overheard my conversations. As much as I waxed about "changing the narrative" and normalizing abortion as health care, I wasn’t sure I wanted to explain it to my curious little girl. We hadn’t even discussed the birds and the bees. How could I leapfrog to abortion?
I waved my daughter off for weeks. She persisted. I caved. When I finally informed Skye that I would tell her the definition of abortion, she squealed like a child presented with a Roblox gift card. She leaned forward in anticipation. I simply told her abortion is when a woman or person doesn’t want to be pregnant anymore and terminates the pregnancy. A crestfallen Skye side-eyed me. That’s it? her expression conveyed. She expected something juicy and what I told her not only made sense but was No Big Deal. She resumed playing on her iPad.
All of my gibbering about "changing the narrative" and normalizing abortion as a medical procedure wasn’t even necessary in my own home. It already existed. In our mother-daughter exchange, I learned a lesson, too.
Malignant myths and misinformation
Since our uneventful chat, the implications of Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization continue to reverberate throughout the country. The federal, constitutional right to an abortion is over. A patchwork of state laws determines body autonomy and erodes reproductive rights.
According to the Guttmacher Institute, a pro-reproductive rights organization, within 100 days of that court decision, 66 brick-and-mortar clinics across more than a dozen states stopped providing abortions. Travel times to clinics increased nationwide, especially in southern states.
That has meant Illinois, with its strong abortion protections, is sometimes the closest state to access abortion services. In 2022, there were 56,457 abortions in Illinois; 16,849 were from out of state. The prior year, 11,307 patients were from out-of-state.
Quashing Roe isn’t enough for former President Donald Trump. He boasts about appointing the justices who voted to undo Roe. The Republican is a mascot for the anti-abortion crusade. So much so, Trump spreads misinformation. During the presidential debate earlier this month, Trump declared: "They will take the life of a child in the eighth month, the ninth month and even after birth."
Impossible.
As chief medical officer of Planned Parenthood Illinois, Dr. Amy Whitaker has this reaction to Trump: "The man is lying again and that myth is just a myth. Even the phrase "abortion after birth" is not only a lie but definitionally impossible.”
Emotion trumps truth in Trump’s playbook. Those opposing abortion tolerate misinformation; it helps fortify their movement. In Illinois, abortion is not allowed after what’s known as "fetal viability," which means the fetus could survive outside of the uterus. The exception is to protect a patient’s life or health. And that is rare. Very rare.
"Less than 1% of abortions happen even after 21 weeks. And almost 95% occur within 13 weeks. That’s not the narrative they want to spin. It’s not a benign myth. It's specifically designed to turn public opinion against abortion. When I hear those lies, I’m caught between laughing and crying at how harmful they are," Whitaker said.
She said sometimes Planned Parenthood patients come in with misconceptions about abortion. Some have been taught that abortion isn’t health care and are pleasantly surprised to be treated with humanity and dignity.
"Abortion is common, normal health care. One in four women has had an abortion — all those facts don’t fit their false narratives that abortion is wrong," Whitaker said.
Fewer rights for younger generation
In 2016, Trump ran on a platform of banning abortion and punishing women who have abortions. This time around, abortion is a key issue in the presidential race and Democratic nominee Kamala Harris is strident in her support of reproductive rights.
Abortion restrictions and misinformation end up hurting the most marginalized — low-income, rural and women of color. Access is just as important as choice. Closures of clinics force women to spend money on travel to receive reproductive services. Not to mention missing work or finding child care. These barriers are cumbersome and expensive.
My daughter lives in a country with fewer rights than I had at her age. And at this rate, she’s on track to have fewer rights than when I came of age as a young woman.
The morning after the debate, I listened to news analysis in the car. As usual, Skye was quiet yet listening.
"A nine-month abortion makes no sense," she chimed in with bewilderment.
An 8-year-old has more sense than some politicians.
Natalie Y. Moore is a senior lecturer at Northwestern University.
Send letters to letters@suntimes.com
Get Opinions content delivered to your inbox. Sign up for our weekly newsletter here.