I cheated on my husband & it improved our sex life – he was upset at first but now likes the idea of me with other men
A COUPLE revealed how infidelity helped their marriage and spiced up their sex life.
After discovering his wife’s affair, one man realised he liked thinking about her with other men.
In a Reddit post, the husband explained how his wife’s actions ended up improving their sex life.
He revealed that his wife went to a work function and when she returned, they “had a wild adult night.”
However, the poster’s wife then began distancing herself from him before eventually admitting to a workplace affair.
“Apparently there is a guy at her work who she referred to as a ‘work flirt,'” he wrote.
“Well, at the happy hour, they got a little drunk and a little too flirty.
“The event was at a hotel bar and they ended up getting a room.”
While his wife attributed her actions to the alcohol, she did reveal that she “felt something missing sexually” with her husband.
She explained that “she felt something ‘electric'” when her co-worker kissed her.
The wife added that “she was feeling so wild after what happened” that she instigated “the craziest night” when she returned from the work drinks.
“I told her I needed some time and I went back to the guest room,” the man recalled.
“I kept thinking about her and another man and two things happened, I was very hurt and upset and really turned on.
“I have no idea why, but the thought of her with someone else was really working me up.”
Despite his newly discovered cheating fantasy, the husband said they still had a lot to work out.
“The betrayal I feel is real, but I can’t get over the fact that the thought of her with other men appeals to me,” he concluded.
He added that his wife has started looking for new jobs and has arranged for them to go to couple’s therapy.
Four red flags your partner is cheating
Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating.
They start to take their phone everywhere with them
In close relationships, it’s normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
Aaron says: “If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful.”
“You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don’t want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it’s an easy way to get caught out,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren’t there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify.
“To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven’t walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating,” warns Aaron.
Reddit users shared their thoughts on the situation in the comments section.
“I think you need to separate the fetish here. If you really want to pursue the fetish, you need honesty in your relationship,” pointed out one reader.
“I think it’s a cop out rationalization. He just got kicked down to rhythm guitar from lead guitar in his own band, and is saying ‘this is great,'” said another commenter.
“Being into that is fine and all that, but with your knowledge and consent. That’s what separates ethical non-monogamy and cheating,” commented a third person.
“he thought excited you because it was already over and done with, it was basically like a fantasy,” wrote another Redditor.