After Tom Cruise once denied ‘abandoning’ Suri, she seems to get the last word

Tom Cruise’s long and evident estrangement from his daughter Suri came into sharp focus last weekend — 11 years after he filed a $50 million defamation lawsuit against a publication that reported that he had “abandoned” his daughter because his ex-wife, Katie Holmes, wouldn’t raise her in the Church of Scientology.

In a September 2013 deposition for the case, the Hollywood mega-star explained his objections to reports by In Touch that said he had cut ties with a then-7-year-old Suri after Holmes divorced him in 2012. He took issue with the publication claiming that he, a top celebrity member of Scientology, had chosen the church over his daughter “for good.”

“‘Abandoned by Daddy,’” Cruise said angrily in the deposition, referring to the headline of the story. “I mean, come on, that is absolutely disgusting. That is absolutely disgusting.”

But as Queen Elizabeth II once famously said about “recollections,” definitions of “abandonment” also may vary in this situation. In a report this week, The Sun quoted insiders who said that Cruise has not seen his daughter in 11 years.

Allegations of “abandonment” returned last weekend as Cruise let himself be photographed at one of Taylor Swift’s sold-out “Eras Tour” performances at Wembley Stadium in London. The “Top Gun” actor was seen exchanging friendship bracelets, hanging out with NFL star Travis Kelce and dancing to Swift’s music in the VIP seats.

But the night before, Cruise very publicly missed a major milestone in Suri’s life: her graduation from the Fiorello H. LaGuardia High School of Music & Art and Performing Arts in New York City.

Cruise’s absence from Suri’s graduation made headlines. And then came more headlines about the 18-year-old dropping her father’s surname for the ceremony. She instead used the name “Siri Noelle.”

Sources told Page Six that the new name was a tribute to her mother. Noelle is Katie Holmes’ middle name, and Holmes has essentially raised Suri as a single parent in New York City since her divorce from Cruise.

It’s not clear whether Suri has gone to court to make the name change official, Page Six said. A source told the publication that Suri dropped her father’s surname because she wants her “own identity” and to “start fresh at college.”

But Suri’s new name choice also could be seen as a rebuke of her famous father — a sign that she has, in her way, abandoned him.

Tony Ortega, a journalist who covers Scientology, called Cruise out this week for “abandonment,” following reports about the actor going to Swift’s concert but not his daughter’s graduation. In an email newsletter for his Underground Bunker newsletter, Ortega said that choices Cruise has made over the past 12 years show that his “abandonment” of his daughter is “even worse than most people realize.”

Cruise and Holmes began dating in 2005, became parents to Suri in the spring of 2006 and married later that year in a ceremony at an Italian castle that was  attended by a number of high-profile Scientologists, including church leader David Miscavige.

Early in the marriage, Holmes was very involved in the church, which is said to exert a cult-like control over its members, Ortega said. But her interest in building her life around Scientology teachings cooled over the next six years, Ortega said. As Holmes was raising Suri, she also was getting to know Cruise’s older children, Isabella and Connor, whose mother is Nicole Kidman. Like Holmes, Kidman was initially very involved in the organization, but the Oscar winner’s interest similarly waned before her split from Cruise in 2001.

Isabella and Connor ended up living with Cruise following the divorce, where they were home-schooled and taught that Kidman was a “suppressive person,” or an SP, someone who is viewed as hostile to Scientology, according to a 2012 investigative story by Vanity Fair.

Holmes would have become aware that Scientology’s indoctrination for Suri would begin after her sixth birthday, Ortega reported. It’s no coincidence that Holmes decided to leave Cruise in 2012, around the time Suri turned six, The Sun also reported.

Cruise admitted he “didn’t expect” Holmes to file for divorce; the divorce proceeded quickly with the ex-spouses reaching a settlement within 11 days. The Sun reported that Cruise was granted sole custody of Suri. Under the terms of the settlement, Cruise also was required to pay $400,000 a year to help with her upbringing. There’s been no reporting that Cruise didn’t fulfill this obligation.

Holmes’ decision to leave the marriage, seek primary custody of Suri and enroll their daughter in private school caused “a massive public relations disaster” for Cruise and for Scientology, according to Ortega and Vanity Fair.

Holmes’ actions “would be automatic grounds for disconnection” from the church and Scientology members “if she were married to any other Scientologist,” Vanity Fair reported. But Cruise was given the option to maintain ties with his daughter, because of his celebrity status within the church, according to Ortega and Variety Fair.

To what extent Cruise maintained a relationship with his daughter became the chief source of contention in the actor’s lawsuit against In Touch and its owner, Bauer Publishing, according to The Hollywood Reporter. In his deposition, Cruise said he never “cut Suri out of my life — whether physically, emotionally, financially or otherwise.

Cruise acknowledged that he didn’t get to see often since the divorce. He said it was difficult to arrange visits around his film shoots and Holmes’ schedule.

“Certainly what doesn’t change is the love that I have for my daughter, and that I didn’t abandon her emotionally, physically or otherwise,” Cruise said. “And in terms of how I feel about her in terms of the responsibility that I feel towards my child is not—(has) not waned in any way.”

But in his deposition, Cruise acknowledged that he only saw his daughter for 10 days between June 18 and Thanksgiving in 2012. He also faced tough questioning over the fact that he had taken a quick, 24-hour trip in the midst of a film production to fly to the U.K. from the East Coast to attend a Scientology event, but he had not found time to visit his daughter, who was living in New York City. Cruise also was pressed to acknowledge that one of the reasons that Holmes sought a divorce was to protect Suri from Scientology.

Several weeks after Cruise’s deposition became public, the actor settled his lawsuit with Bauer Publishing in December 2013, the Hollywood Reporter said. Terms of the settlement were not released, but Bauer Publishing released a joint statement with Cruise’s attorneys. The statement said that the publisher “never intended to communicate that Tom Cruise had cut off all ties and abandoned his daughter, Suri, and regret if anyone drew that inference from anything they published.”

Since then, there have been multiple reports over the years, saying that Cruise doesn’t see his daughter. The Sun’s report suggested that their visits ended around around 2013.

In his newsletter, Ortega took issue with Cruise’s alleged choice to Suri out of his life, even as he apparently enjoyed an exception in Scientology. Ortega said he could ignore rules that apply to most members, who are told to disconnect from family and friends who are non-believers,  Ortega said.

“Even if Scientology had formally declared Katie to be an enemy, Tom Cruise is not a regular Scientology member,” Ortega said. “He’s a celebrity. And in fact, the most important Scientology celebrity of all time. And as a celebrity, Tom would have the ability to ignore those rules and continue to see both Katie and Suri if he wanted to.”

“But that’s not what happened,” Ortega said. “As the years passed after that 2012 split, it became more and more obvious that Tom had completely cut Katie and Suri out of his life.”

Ortega believes that Cruise in fact chose Scientology over his own daughter, even after the actor denied doing so in 2012. Cruise did so because he’s convinced that the late Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard “is the greatest human being who ever lived” and that Hubbard’s “technology” is the only thing that will “save” this planet, Ortega said.

Cruise would therefore want to maintain his relationship with Scientology, even if it meant not having one with his daughter, Ortega said. But the journalist offered another reason that Cruise cut ties with Suri when he didn’t have to.

In Ortega’s view, Cruise is not an admirable person, not as he’s often portrayed in positive press accounts. Ortega actually used more blunt terms to describe Cruise and insisted that the media is “always too afraid” to call him out.