The Out-of-Touch Adults' Guide to Kid Culture: 100 Men vs. One Gorilla
This week, the Out-of-Touch Guide grapples with an eternal question of man vs. beast, sees Gen Z throw a hilarious right cross at millennial decorating trends, contemplates whether refusing to wash your face is a skincare routine or a cry for help, and explains why serving booze at weddings has become a generational flashpoint.
What is "100 men vs. 1 Gorilla?"
In a video posted three years ago, TikToker yuri5kpt2 was the first online to ask a seemingly simple question: who would win in a fight between 100 men and a single gorilla? It took some time for the general population to catch on to this intriguing hypothetical, but critical mass was achieved this week, and the debate has spread everywhere online.
My first thought was 100 men are taking it, without a doubt. I mean, it's a hundred guys! But then I considered the overwhelming power of an enraged gorilla, how it could literally tear off limbs and bite off faces, and the scale started tipping heavily the other way. I mean, look at this thing:
On the other hand, actual primatologist Dr. Tara Stoinski gives it to humans:
But I don't think she's considering the panic factor. If the question assumes 100 average dudes with no training, I'm guessing about 99 of them run screaming as soon as the most unlucky of the bunch has his face bitten off. I know I would. But the gorilla is going to panic when it sees a mob of 100 men screaming at the top of their lungs!
Then there's stamina to consider. According to this (self-proclaimed) animal expert, the gorilla would be gassed after killing 30 or 40 dudes, so the men would ultimately triumph, but only after taking heavy casualties.
Right now, I'm leaning slightly toward humans, based on the combined stamina of 100 people and our natural survival instinct. This is the kind of question that won't be answered until someone does it for real, and good luck making that happen with all the "laws" we have.
Because this is 2025, the question couldn't be left to quietly drift away like previous internet imponderables like "what would you do if a super intelligent, deadly snail was following you?" Instead, it's become a part of the tedious "gender wars" with people hijacking the format to ask questions like, "Can we get 100 women vs. accountability?" Responses include "how about 100 men vs. shutting the fuck up?" Can we just have one fight between a gorilla and 100 men without people ruining it?
What is "caveman skincare?"
Moving up the evolutionary ladder from gorillas, we have "caveman skincare," a minimalist approach to personal hygiene that involves not washing your face, or at least not using soap. The idea has been kicking around since at least the 1960s, but TikToker Tia Zakher brought it to the world's attention in April by documenting her experiment of not applying any products to her face, or even washing it at all. The idea is to "reset" your skin to a more natural, and presumably healthier, state. The result is not exactly pretty.
But this is temporary, at least according to Zakher. She says the uneven, bumpy skin on her face is a build-up of dead skin cells that would normally be washed away, and underneath is healthy, clear skin. Most commenters don't seem to agree, and suggest that it's actually a fungal infection, or maybe she's rage-baiting, faking it for the attention, or it's just gross.
There's a lot going on here culturally. Widespread interest in the technique seems like a backlash to the elaborate, expensive skincare routines many people feel they need, and the online trashing of Zakher is depressingly predictable, given that she's a young woman who is doing something other than presenting herself as alluringly as possible. But all that aside, is this actually a good idea? According to dermatologists, not really, but a little, maybe, kind of.
"It could temporarily help some people whose skin is extremely irritated from overuse of products, as it reduces the chances of chemical irritation," dermatologist Dr. Angela J. Lamb told Teen Vogue, but she added that if you're still wearing makeup and working out, not washing will likely clog your pores and could make acne worse or lead to fungal infections.
According to another dermatologist quoted by Teen Vogue, Dr. Asmi Berry, the caveman method is not backed by scientific evidence, and there's a better approach to dealing with strengthening your skin. "Stick to a gentle cleanser, a hydrating moisturizer, and a mineral sunscreen," Dr. Berry suggests.
What is millennial green and why is it so cringe?
Maybe it's my inner mean girl, but I can't get enough of members of Generations Z noticing lame details about millennial culture and savagely roasting them for it. First it was being overly into Harry Potter, then eating at millennial burger joints, and now it's "millennial green."
Sometimes called "sage" or "forest green," Millennial green is an evolution of the "sad beige" aesthetic from a few years ago. It hovers around here on the Pantone scale:
Once you notice it, you notice it everywhere—just as evolution eventually leads to crabs, all decorating eventually leads to millennial green.
I love this trend because millennials are still young enough to care what kids think of their decorating choices, and they're posting funny/poignant videos about discovering that they're not cool:
Wait, I just realized that Lifehacker's color is kind of a millennial green. We're not super cringe, are we? Oh my god. I'm going to rethink my life now.
Gen Z and cash bars at weddings
OK, I'm back. Our website may be millennial green, but at least Lifehacker understands the importance of free booze at weddings. With June marriage season approaching, many young people are defending the practice of charging their guests for drinks at their weddings. This is against the order of nature and should not be allowed.
Check out the discussion in this X comment section:
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On the other side of the debate are Gen Z members calling people "alcoholics" for expecting free drinks.
Seriously, people should be able to have whatever kind of wedding they'd like, but this debate highlights another cultural divide between Gen Z and We Who Have Come Before: Youngsters aren't drinking as much as previous generations, proving that the real generation gap isn’t about napkin colors; it’s whether you think vodka should come with a price tag.
Viral video of the week: I Hid in Viral YouTube Videos and Nobody Noticed…
This weeks' viral video is about viral videos. So meta. YouTuber Airrack has made a name for himself with challenge and prank videos, often involving sneaking into and hiding in unlikely places, like the Superbowl or Disneyland. This week, he decided to sneak into other YouTubers' videos.
The idea is that Airrack would disguise himself and appear in the background of videos from online celebrities like cooking YouTuber Nick Digiovanni, fitness influencer Jesse James West, filmmaker Darman, gadget-maker Mark Rober, and car destroyer Whistlin' Diesel. If the commenters spot him, they get a point. If they don't, Airrack does. I won't spoil the ending, but Airrack has promised that if he loses, he'll do whatever the most upvoted comment says. That comment is "Legally change your name to diddy," which really raises the stakes. Whether the entire project is a delightful sitcom-crossover-style experiment or an annoying influencer stunt depends on your point of view, but the kids, as they say, love it.