ChatGPT is coming for Wall Street next

Welcome back! Dan DeFrancesco in NYC. 

On tap, we've got stories on how ChatGPT is being used at one PE giant, the jobs you want, and don't, during a recession, and how to get back at your ex if you're feeling petty.

But first, the robots are here. 

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1. Give them an inch and they'll take a mile.

I think it's time to talk about ChatGPT...

If you're not familiar with the buzzy chatbot that has become the latest obsession of the internet, you should start with our guide to everything you need to know about ChatGPT.

In short, ChatGPT is a really fancy chatbot. And while chatbots have been around for years, ChatGPT uses something called generative artificial intelligence that makes its answers sound a lot smarter than your average chatbot (or maybe not, depending on who you ask). 

But let's be honest. You don't care about all that. You only care about one thing:

Is this thing going to take my job?

The short answer is: No... not yet.

Insider's Paige Hagy and Bianca Chan asked industry experts how they see a tool like ChatGPT impacting all areas of Wall Street, from investment banking to financial planning to consumer banking. 

And while it's still early days, the verdict seems to be that ChatGPT can help finance employees do their job more efficiently.

It's not that ChatGPT is going to replace people's jobs. It's going to help them focus on the more valuable, important stuff! 

... Rigggggght.

It's not that I think these people are lying. I've just seen this show before.

Every new tech innovation to come to Wall Street has always been pitched as a way to help employees "work smarter not harder," and every time it's eventually led to a company looking for redundant roles as a result of the new tech.

So if your boss pitches you on using ChatGPT to help "streamline your workflow" understand that you could be training your replacement. 

Click here to read more about the types of jobs ChatGPT might upend across Wall Street.

In other news:

2. Meanwhile, one investing firm is already getting ahead of the game when it comes to using ChatGPT. Swedish PE giant EQT has already found value in using ChatGPT to help its dealmakers interface with a massive database the firm has spent nearly a decade building. More on how it's using the tech here.

3. The king of meme stocks eyes Nordstrom. Billionaire activist investor Ryan Cohen, who played a key role in the meme-stock frenzy of 2021, has targeted the luxury department-store chain. Here's more on the changes Cohen wants to see at Nordstrom.

4. Pink Floyd's "Money" takes on a whole new meaning. Wall Street trading firm GTS Securities is looking to make investing in music royalties accessible to the general public, Bloomberg reports. Read more on how it plans to do it here.

5. The safest, and riskiest, jobs amid a potential recession. Even though the unemployment rate is the lowest it's been since 1969, people are still on edge about job security. We asked economists the roles that are recession-proof and the ones on the chopping block. Here's the rundown. 

6. Is crypto back?! Don't call it a comeback! Crypto-related stocks had a BIG start to the year, with some up over 100%. These are the biggest gainers.

7. How to keep your noggin in tip-top shape. Do things seem to keep slipping your mind? Have you forgotten to call your parents recently? (Maybe that one is on purpose.) Either way, these are 6 science-backed ways to keep your memory sharp and fight off dementia.

8. She made $2 million selling her study notes from college. Stephanee Beggs made seven figures selling her study materials on TikTok and Etsy, which means she cleared more business than half the bankers on Wall Street. (Too soon?) 

9. The slow death of WFH? Offices in the US recently hit an average occupancy rate of 50.4%, its highest rate since the pandemic. More on what that means for remote-or-die workers.

10. Show your ex's true colors by turning them into an actual red flag. Now this is an AI tool we can all get behind. Picsart lets users replace photos of their ex with things like red flags or snakes. Learn more here if you're feeling petty. And while we are at it, here are 21 pairs of TV co-stars who had to keep working together after they stopped dating. 

Curated by Dan DeFrancesco in New York. Feedback or tips? Email ddefrancesco@insider.com, tweet @dandefrancesco, or connect on LinkedIn. Edited by Jeffrey Cane (tweet @jeffrey_cane) in New York and Hallam Bullock (tweet @hallam_bullock) in London.