My daughter, 9, has already started puberty and my sister-in-law blames ME – the reason she gave is so ridiculous
A MUM has told of her shock after her sister-in-law blamed her for her daughter’s early development.
Writing anonymously for Kidspot the Australian-based mum explained that there is little that she and her sister-in-law don’t discuss but this particular conversation took an odd turn.
A mum has revealed that her daughter, 9, has already started puberty and that her sister-in-law is blaming her[/caption]Here we share her bizarre encounter…
She writes: “My sister-in-law, Elle*, and I were catching up one weekend as our kids all played together at my home.
Our conversations are always pretty open, and nothing is really off limits which, usually, is a great thing as we can discuss topics that are sometimes more difficult to talk about with other people, especially in regard to our own kids.
On this particular day, the topic of puberty came up and I mentioned to her that my eldest daughter, Hannah*, who is nine had already started going through it and had been for a while now.
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When I started speaking with her about the changes and what was happening, it felt really helpful because I could share my own worries and fears about puberty, how to deal with it as a parent, and make it not something to fear like it was when I went through it.
It felt comforting to have someone else to listen and also give insights on an issue that can be tricky.
As we continued our discussion, Elle asked me questions about what types of development she had begun to experience, how she was feeling about it, and her own memories of going through these things. But then something changed.
When I told her that Hannah had breast buds (the beginnings of breasts), I could see her face change from one of understanding and support to one that looked like the penny had dropped and something I’d said had put elusive pieces of a puzzle together.
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At first, I had no idea why she was reacting like this, but I wasn’t left in the dark for too long.
Elle asked, almost as if she knew the answer I was going to give, ‘do you eat a lot of chicken?’
Puzzled, I asked why she wanted to know this.
‘They pump chickens full of hormones and that can cause breast growth in humans you know,’ she replied.
While hearing this sounded absolutely ludicrous, it was crystal clear that this question and follow-up response was not a joke and that she was completely serious.
I could feel anger rise inside but I gritted my teeth in order to repress my urge to say something I’d regret. Instead, I laughed, got up and walked away, pretending I had to do something in another area of the house.
Thankfully when I returned Elle didn’t bring it up again or try to continue that conversation. Despite this, I was pretty livid about the comment because it is not the first time, she has something along these lines – alluding to our diet and lifestyle and that it is somehow problematic, which it is not.
The chicken question though was a whole new level of ridiculousness for a whole bunch of reasons.
Firstly, it implied that puberty is a bad thing, that it is unnatural to go through it at a particular age, and that my daughter’s age is abnormal. In actuality, I was the same age as her when these developments began happening to me (and no, I didn’t eat ‘too much’ chicken either).
Secondly, it suggests that what I feed my children is not healthy and worse, that it is filled with nasties that are causing their bodies to alter in a way that they shouldn’t, or at least at a time when they shouldn’t.
Thirdly, her absolute ignorance and lack of education or understanding about this subject are not only insulting, really disrespectful but just plain stupid.
I mean the fact is that Australian chickens (organic or conventional) aren’t even fed, nor do they receive hormones in any way, that is a myth. It is actually illegal for them to be fed hormones and has been for decades.
The other fact, which makes her comments ludicrous, is that we don’t eat chicken for breakfast, lunch and dinner- seven days a week; we eat it maybe three times per week for dinner because, despite her assumption, we eat a nutritionally balanced diet that caters for our family.
But as they say, you can’t pick your family, so despite this ridiculous incident and no doubt plenty more of them to come, we are all still close. Now I just ensure to cook the biggest roast chicken I can find whenever they come around for dinner… just because.”
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* Names have been changed.
This story was originally published on Kidspot and has been reproduced here with permission.