I’m pregnant and my mother-in-law keeps calling it ‘her baby’ – she even wants to sign off on the name, I’m fuming
WHEN you’re adapting to life with a baby, it can be undeniably helpful to have your mother-in-law close-by to lend a helping hand.
But as we’re sure any new parents will agree, you have to set boundaries – and letting them have any say over your child’s name is where most people would draw the line.
Earlier this year, one expectant mum explained how her mother-in-law is VERY excited about the arrival of her first grandchild.
Sharing her dilemma on Reddit, the woman wrote: “She keeps doing this weird thing where she refers to the baby as ‘her’ baby.”
If that wasn’t weird enough, the mother-in-law recently asked if the couple could present her with a shortlist of names they were thinking of for their daughter.
The mum-to-be continued: “I asked her why that was necessary, and she said ‘Oh, you know! Just making sure we’re on the same page.’
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“I asked for clarification to that, why we’d need to be on the same page, and she started getting a bit cagey about it.”
Understandably, the mum-to-be felt she had to put her foot down and reminded her in-laws that it wasn’t their decision to make.
After her mother-in-law referred to the child as “her baby” again, the woman replied: “She’s not your baby. Grandchild, yes. But… you don’t think you get ‘a say’ in anything involving her, do you?
“Like… you don’t think you get any say in her name, how she’s raised, what schools she goes to, how she dresses, any of it, right? You know you’re not the parent here, right?”
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Off the back of this outburst, the mother-in-law labelled her “snooty” and “snobby”.
She continued: “I just got up and said I was bored with this conversation and went to the backyard to go read in the sun while she melted down to my husband about how I’m stealing all the joy from her and that don’t I get that grandma is the most important role she’ll ever play?”
To make matters worse, the soon-to-be grandma has been plastering their argument all over social media and accusing the couple of “keeping her baby away”.
Needless to say, the majority of members in the forum sided with the expectant parents.
One replied: “It’s best to put your foot down now because this kind of thing will only get worse once the baby is born, and every phase thereafter.”
Another added: “New gramma here and STICK TO YOUR GUNS!!
“If I acted that way in front of my son, he would 1) boot me out of his house so fast my head would spin, and 2) block me from all his social media. And damn if I’d ever see my granddaughter.”
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Meanwhile, a third wrote: ” I don’t know that I would assume she’ll get over it, though.
“At least your husband recognizes this is ridiculous, but I think you’re going to have to talk to him about holding firm if she continues to try and weaponize the rest of the family against you.”